adj. Groo-flipping-flopping-vy.
Real citation: "ahaha that is un flipping flapping real! those kids got talent. im actually so happy that u shared that with me.
the start- love a birra asian
the middle- new chris brown in the making
the end- heartfelt as you dont want it to be over"
(Clare Pender, http://de.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=72273068)
Made-up citation: "You know what I find un-flipping-flapping-real? Women who have six visible straps. It's a mathematical puzzle. Some straps I understand: two go down to the bra, two come up from the shirt. What are the other two straps connected to? Ovary harness? It seems awkward to ask."
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
confuzzle-osity
noun. Huh?
Real citation: "My Confuzzle-osity..."
(Oct. 25, 2008, My Wonderful World of Wicketty-Wack, http://wickettywack.blogspot.com/2008/10/my-confuzzle-osity.html)
Made-up citation: "There is much confuzzle-osity in the journey of the cosmos. Hmm. That could be the concussion talking."
Real citation: "My Confuzzle-osity..."
(Oct. 25, 2008, My Wonderful World of Wicketty-Wack, http://wickettywack.blogspot.com/2008/10/my-confuzzle-osity.html)
Made-up citation: "There is much confuzzle-osity in the journey of the cosmos. Hmm. That could be the concussion talking."
Monday, March 02, 2009
supervillainistic
adj. Mwah-hah-hah-y.
Real citation: "Wanted is basically a juvenile superheroic (supervillainistic?) power fantasy for teens and 20-something hooked on comics, action movies and GTA games. Women are best advised to avoid this as the testosterone fueling the comic is in overdrive."
(Nov. 18, 2008, Being Centered, http://lyehuat1973.blogspot.com/2008/11/wanted.html)
Made-up citation: "It wasn't easy being the most supervillainistic kid in school... Everyone else is playing video games, while I'm trying to sterilize the human race or tie a damsel to the tracks. Do you know how hard it is for a kid to get his hands on a good damsel? I just hope my children will have all the damsels they need (and that Amtrak maintains a regular schedule)."
Real citation: "Wanted is basically a juvenile superheroic (supervillainistic?) power fantasy for teens and 20-something hooked on comics, action movies and GTA games. Women are best advised to avoid this as the testosterone fueling the comic is in overdrive."
(Nov. 18, 2008, Being Centered, http://lyehuat1973.blogspot.com/2008/11/wanted.html)
Made-up citation: "It wasn't easy being the most supervillainistic kid in school... Everyone else is playing video games, while I'm trying to sterilize the human race or tie a damsel to the tracks. Do you know how hard it is for a kid to get his hands on a good damsel? I just hope my children will have all the damsels they need (and that Amtrak maintains a regular schedule)."
pre-unholy-trinity
adj. Such a simpler time, before non-holy trios roamed the plains.
Real citation: "therefore no clue how the day was spent. although i think that Alicen and Kerry and i hashed out our plans for going to Firenze on saturday. i felt like i was just tagging along...crazy pre-unholy-trinity times."
(Feb. 9, 2007, Il Centro, un'anno fa, http://un-anno-fa.blogspot.com/2007/02/day-27-another.html)
Made-up citation: "Everything changed in my family, pre-unholy-trinity and post-unholy-trinity. Even the dog poo now has seven heads, but it doesn't smell, which is interesting,"
Real citation: "therefore no clue how the day was spent. although i think that Alicen and Kerry and i hashed out our plans for going to Firenze on saturday. i felt like i was just tagging along...crazy pre-unholy-trinity times."
(Feb. 9, 2007, Il Centro, un'anno fa, http://un-anno-fa.blogspot.com/2007/02/day-27-another.html)
Made-up citation: "Everything changed in my family, pre-unholy-trinity and post-unholy-trinity. Even the dog poo now has seven heads, but it doesn't smell, which is interesting,"
Sunday, March 01, 2009
FWBs (followers with benefits)
noun phrase. Hmm. I may have to rethink my atheism. Anyone need a Pope?
Real citation: "I thought this show was a clever commentary on looking at the darkest, and brightest, parts of ourselves. A look at our future and our past. All this has happened before. In my head I always finished with and could happen again if we don't figure out how to stop it. But all this talk of angels and gods and visions is like spiritual technobabble but without the really useful requirements of science or logic or collective observation or even, say, a plan. I find it particularly telling the greatest scientific mind of the colonies is merely a fake religious zealot who says pretty words and has his own visions but doesn't use that amazing scientific brain to use science to help people or even to get more FWBs (followers with benefits). For me, a great show should have an organic ending. It doesn't have to be predictable, just logical. A science fiction show should use science once in a while. And a show that promises to be a mirror should actually reflect us."
(Feb. 28, 2009, "4-17: "Someone To Watch Over Me" 2009.02.27," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3182678&view=findpost&p=11424551)
Made-up citation: "Join my new religion! It's based on a steady diet of pancakes, grain alcohol, organ harvesting, inner peace, and followers with benefits. So when can I stop paying taxes?"
Real citation: "I thought this show was a clever commentary on looking at the darkest, and brightest, parts of ourselves. A look at our future and our past. All this has happened before. In my head I always finished with and could happen again if we don't figure out how to stop it. But all this talk of angels and gods and visions is like spiritual technobabble but without the really useful requirements of science or logic or collective observation or even, say, a plan. I find it particularly telling the greatest scientific mind of the colonies is merely a fake religious zealot who says pretty words and has his own visions but doesn't use that amazing scientific brain to use science to help people or even to get more FWBs (followers with benefits). For me, a great show should have an organic ending. It doesn't have to be predictable, just logical. A science fiction show should use science once in a while. And a show that promises to be a mirror should actually reflect us."
(Feb. 28, 2009, "4-17: "Someone To Watch Over Me" 2009.02.27," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3182678&view=findpost&p=11424551)
Made-up citation: "Join my new religion! It's based on a steady diet of pancakes, grain alcohol, organ harvesting, inner peace, and followers with benefits. So when can I stop paying taxes?"
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Crapinator-in-Chief
noun. El crapidente. In this case, the Bushidente.
Real citation: "In a sadly ironic twist, the Crapinator-in-Chief wasn’t far off the mark with his joke about dictatorships being easier to govern as long as you’re the one running them. Any time you get people involved, everything goes to hell in a hand-basket…fast."
(June 29, 2008, Bring it On, http://www.teambio.org/2008/06/29/throwing-the-candidate-out-with-the-bath-water/)
Made-up citation: "I just elected myself Crapinator-in-Chief and lost ten pounds at the same time. How did I do it? By taking the Browns to the Super Bowl."
Real citation: "In a sadly ironic twist, the Crapinator-in-Chief wasn’t far off the mark with his joke about dictatorships being easier to govern as long as you’re the one running them. Any time you get people involved, everything goes to hell in a hand-basket…fast."
(June 29, 2008, Bring it On, http://www.teambio.org/2008/06/29/throwing-the-candidate-out-with-the-bath-water/)
Made-up citation: "I just elected myself Crapinator-in-Chief and lost ten pounds at the same time. How did I do it? By taking the Browns to the Super Bowl."
Friday, February 27, 2009
I-told-you-so-esque
adj. Often found in arrest reports and love letters that are also nyah-nyah-ish.
Real citation: "I don't even know what I should feel, must I feel an I-told-you-so-esque feeling? To be honest, I don't."
(June 24, 2008, http://veritaserumplease.blogspot.com/2008_06_01_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "I hate to be all I-told-you-so-esque, but there's a reason my variation of the atomic wedgie is feared up and down the eastern seaboard. Now you know, Dr. Vargas! Now you know."
Real citation: "I don't even know what I should feel, must I feel an I-told-you-so-esque feeling? To be honest, I don't."
(June 24, 2008, http://veritaserumplease.blogspot.com/2008_06_01_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "I hate to be all I-told-you-so-esque, but there's a reason my variation of the atomic wedgie is feared up and down the eastern seaboard. Now you know, Dr. Vargas! Now you know."
Thursday, February 26, 2009
three-way-o-phobe
noun. A disliker of the erotic and triadic arts.
Real citation: "Dr. Drew isn't a homophobe. He's an asshole-o-phobe—and a BDSM-o-phobe, a premarital-sex-o-phobe, a three-way-o-phobe, etc. Basically, when it comes to human sexuality, there's not a lot of daylight between Dr. Drew and Pope Benedict XVI. And I'll let you in on a little secret: Odds are good that your ass is going to leak when you're old, anyway—I'll betcha the pope's ass is leaking all over the throne of St. Peter right now—so you might as well enjoy it while you can."
(Dan Savage, Feb. 19, 2009, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=1118133)
Made-up citation: "Three-way-o-phobes have ruined this country, and they're out of touch with the founding fathers. Don't people know the original American flag was a bedsheet for a menage a awesome with George Washington, Abe Lincoln, and Mae West? USA! USA!"
Real citation: "Dr. Drew isn't a homophobe. He's an asshole-o-phobe—and a BDSM-o-phobe, a premarital-sex-o-phobe, a three-way-o-phobe, etc. Basically, when it comes to human sexuality, there's not a lot of daylight between Dr. Drew and Pope Benedict XVI. And I'll let you in on a little secret: Odds are good that your ass is going to leak when you're old, anyway—I'll betcha the pope's ass is leaking all over the throne of St. Peter right now—so you might as well enjoy it while you can."
(Dan Savage, Feb. 19, 2009, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=1118133)
Made-up citation: "Three-way-o-phobes have ruined this country, and they're out of touch with the founding fathers. Don't people know the original American flag was a bedsheet for a menage a awesome with George Washington, Abe Lincoln, and Mae West? USA! USA!"
Aquamanliness
noun. Can you command fish? Are you spandex-clad? Jealous of Batman? This could apply to you.
(Oct. 13, 2004, Octopus Overlords, http://octopusoverlords.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1247507)
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
crotchfruitian
noun. An inhabitant of the magical land of Crotchfruitistan, which outsiders know as "childhood".
Related terms: bio-crotchfruit, great-grand-crotchfruit, crotchfruitish, crotchfruity.
Real citation: "My youngest crotchfruitian, Ash, will be One Year Old in a couple of weeks; I really find it very difficult to believe that a year has passed so quickly.. After all the angst during his gestation, I'm so happy to say that I love him utterly and don't regret his participation in my life one little bit. I love him so much and thank og that he's my son. He's beautiful and happy and up on his feet and even though he enjoys slapping me and attempting to extract my eyeballs in order to use them as teething instruments I can't imagine life without him."
(April 8, 2006, Livejournal, http://hoopy.livejournal.com/12371.html)
Made-up citation: "Welcome crotchfruitians! Today we're going to strangle bunnies and crush joy--it's part of evidence-based education, and you're going to love the synergy."
Related terms: bio-crotchfruit, great-grand-crotchfruit, crotchfruitish, crotchfruity.
Real citation: "My youngest crotchfruitian, Ash, will be One Year Old in a couple of weeks; I really find it very difficult to believe that a year has passed so quickly.. After all the angst during his gestation, I'm so happy to say that I love him utterly and don't regret his participation in my life one little bit. I love him so much and thank og that he's my son. He's beautiful and happy and up on his feet and even though he enjoys slapping me and attempting to extract my eyeballs in order to use them as teething instruments I can't imagine life without him."
(April 8, 2006, Livejournal, http://hoopy.livejournal.com/12371.html)
Made-up citation: "Welcome crotchfruitians! Today we're going to strangle bunnies and crush joy--it's part of evidence-based education, and you're going to love the synergy."
poor-human-being-itude
noun. A quality found in many human beings and a few well-trained aardvarks.
Real citation: "I had a very similar relationship with my grandfather, except the cheating on my grandmother, favoritism among children, abuse, and general poor-human-being-itude was confirmed and factual. When he died, I told my mom (his daughter in law) that I didn't feel very badly about it, because I'd always found him to be creepy. So had she. Throughout his life, I was respectful and polite to him, and that's the end of anyone's real obligation to someone with whom you spend two days a year."
(Nov. 21, 2006, Ask Metefilter, http://ask.metafilter.com/51473/What-duty-do-I-have-to-my-grandfather-or-more-generally-to-my-extended-family)
Made-up citation: "Is it an example of poor-human-being-itude if I hire orphans to work in coal mines made of nuclear waste, while forbidding puppies and mirth among my minions? Pish-posh! Some of those orphans are real assholes."
Real citation: "I had a very similar relationship with my grandfather, except the cheating on my grandmother, favoritism among children, abuse, and general poor-human-being-itude was confirmed and factual. When he died, I told my mom (his daughter in law) that I didn't feel very badly about it, because I'd always found him to be creepy. So had she. Throughout his life, I was respectful and polite to him, and that's the end of anyone's real obligation to someone with whom you spend two days a year."
(Nov. 21, 2006, Ask Metefilter, http://ask.metafilter.com/51473/What-duty-do-I-have-to-my-grandfather-or-more-generally-to-my-extended-family)
Made-up citation: "Is it an example of poor-human-being-itude if I hire orphans to work in coal mines made of nuclear waste, while forbidding puppies and mirth among my minions? Pish-posh! Some of those orphans are real assholes."
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
non-robo-head
noun. A thoroughly organic noggin that therefore conceals no laser-powered eye-blasters.
Real citation: "While walking down the street today, I saw a man with a wireless earpiece for his phone. I didn't see that at first because I was coming from his non-robo-head side. So, he just looks like a well-dressed older man standing on the sidewalk with his arms crossed and arguing with no one. I find it difficult not to laugh
at these people. I love that technology is bridging the gap between the businessman and the crazy, homeless man who talks to himself on the street."
(July 13, 2005, Livejournal, http://nicetrousers.livejournal.com/11560.html)
Made-up citation: "When you meet the William 900, please speak to his non-robo-head, but don't get too close; we haven't worked out the face-biting glitch just yet."
Real citation: "While walking down the street today, I saw a man with a wireless earpiece for his phone. I didn't see that at first because I was coming from his non-robo-head side. So, he just looks like a well-dressed older man standing on the sidewalk with his arms crossed and arguing with no one. I find it difficult not to laugh
at these people. I love that technology is bridging the gap between the businessman and the crazy, homeless man who talks to himself on the street."
(July 13, 2005, Livejournal, http://nicetrousers.livejournal.com/11560.html)
Made-up citation: "When you meet the William 900, please speak to his non-robo-head, but don't get too close; we haven't worked out the face-biting glitch just yet."
cluster-naughty word
noun. A real clustersmurf, I reckon (though less blue, in all senses).
Real citation: "Speaking of Collins, what's up with Jeff Fisher basically calling Billy Volek a liar yesterday? I still haven't figured out the whole Titans cluster-naughty word when it comes to how they went from Steve McNair to Billy Volek to Volek/Vince Young to Collins/Young."
(Sept. 21, 2006, Gene Hurst, Hurst's Fantasy Blog, http://fantasyfootballhelpers.com/blogs/2006/09/short-but-sweet.html)
Made-up citation: "Kindergarteners! What is up with the cluster-naughty word around the gerbil cage? Give that rodent some space, you little mother-firetruckers."
Real citation: "Speaking of Collins, what's up with Jeff Fisher basically calling Billy Volek a liar yesterday? I still haven't figured out the whole Titans cluster-naughty word when it comes to how they went from Steve McNair to Billy Volek to Volek/Vince Young to Collins/Young."
(Sept. 21, 2006, Gene Hurst, Hurst's Fantasy Blog, http://fantasyfootballhelpers.com/blogs/2006/09/short-but-sweet.html)
Made-up citation: "Kindergarteners! What is up with the cluster-naughty word around the gerbil cage? Give that rodent some space, you little mother-firetruckers."
Monday, February 23, 2009
bepancaked
adj. Like bedoofused, but more delicious. And flatter.
Real citation: "Oh, and Kute Kitty? I, and my army of bepancaked rabbits of pain and suffering, do hereby challenge your ninja bunny army to war and chaos! To the victor the spoils!"
(March 31, 2006, Sci-fi and fantasy mass debate, http://www.hostingphpbb.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=10&mforum=scifidiscussion&sid=611d4e8ca685e8ed42c7a1e02ab240a0)
Made-up citation: "All my dreams are bepancaked! I wonder what that means. Click here for the answer and fifty bucks and graphic nudity and free chicken."
Real citation: "Oh, and Kute Kitty? I, and my army of bepancaked rabbits of pain and suffering, do hereby challenge your ninja bunny army to war and chaos! To the victor the spoils!"
(March 31, 2006, Sci-fi and fantasy mass debate, http://www.hostingphpbb.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=10&mforum=scifidiscussion&sid=611d4e8ca685e8ed42c7a1e02ab240a0)
Made-up citation: "All my dreams are bepancaked! I wonder what that means. Click here for the answer and fifty bucks and graphic nudity and free chicken."
nad-ectomy
noun. Deballification.
Real citation: "Cooper got a 'nad-ectomy' last week. It was necessary, not only because we are responsible pet owners and there are more than enough pups running around already that need homes, but because the dog was hell bent on inappropriate sexual behavior. One day Dear Son was sitting on the floor minding his own business and I caught the dog hunched over him from the back having such intense pelvic seizures that I'm surprised he didn't throw his doggy spine out of joint. I was horrified, and I couldn't get the dog to put his stuff away quick enough. That was the last straw. The nad-ectomy was still ten days away, and I was heading for the scissors because I couldn't deal with it any longer. Fortunately I cooled down before I followed through."
(Jan. 18, 2009, Mamma's Gone Mad!, http://mommasgonemad.blogspot.com/2009/01/not-all-empty-scrotums-are-sad.html)
Made-up citation: "Today, on a very special episode of Sesame Street, Elmo is getting a nad-ectomy, because that insufferable little muppet must not be allowed to breed."
Real citation: "Cooper got a 'nad-ectomy' last week. It was necessary, not only because we are responsible pet owners and there are more than enough pups running around already that need homes, but because the dog was hell bent on inappropriate sexual behavior. One day Dear Son was sitting on the floor minding his own business and I caught the dog hunched over him from the back having such intense pelvic seizures that I'm surprised he didn't throw his doggy spine out of joint. I was horrified, and I couldn't get the dog to put his stuff away quick enough. That was the last straw. The nad-ectomy was still ten days away, and I was heading for the scissors because I couldn't deal with it any longer. Fortunately I cooled down before I followed through."
(Jan. 18, 2009, Mamma's Gone Mad!, http://mommasgonemad.blogspot.com/2009/01/not-all-empty-scrotums-are-sad.html)
Made-up citation: "Today, on a very special episode of Sesame Street, Elmo is getting a nad-ectomy, because that insufferable little muppet must not be allowed to breed."
Sunday, February 22, 2009
pet-monkey-ize
verb. To prepare a person, place, thing, or what-have-you for the arrival of domesticated primates--and I don't mean house apes (or "crib lizards", as they are known in some dialects).
Real citation: "To answer Sarah Jessica and Chris’ question, though — a monkey becomes a psychotic pet monkey when you belittle him/her/it. So do your best, if you’re debating picking up a black-market pet monkey to pet-monkey-ize your house and your psyche before he/she/it shows up. Be ready to treat your brand-new pet monkey just like your sister. Nay…better than your sister."
(March 18, 2005, Words For My Enjoyment, http://www.pauldavidson.net/2005/03/18/words-for-your-enjoyment-pet-monkeys/)
Made-up citation: "As the owner of a dog named Monkey, I know just how to pet-monkey-ize a bathroom or linen closet. In related news, I am available in the capacity of zoo consultant or gorilla chew-toy, for a small fee."
Real citation: "To answer Sarah Jessica and Chris’ question, though — a monkey becomes a psychotic pet monkey when you belittle him/her/it. So do your best, if you’re debating picking up a black-market pet monkey to pet-monkey-ize your house and your psyche before he/she/it shows up. Be ready to treat your brand-new pet monkey just like your sister. Nay…better than your sister."
(March 18, 2005, Words For My Enjoyment, http://www.pauldavidson.net/2005/03/18/words-for-your-enjoyment-pet-monkeys/)
Made-up citation: "As the owner of a dog named Monkey, I know just how to pet-monkey-ize a bathroom or linen closet. In related news, I am available in the capacity of zoo consultant or gorilla chew-toy, for a small fee."
Saturday, February 21, 2009
messiah-tastic
adj. Mmm.... Jeebus-y.
Real citation: "The worst sex I've ever had? A girl that shouted 'Hallelujah!' when she climaxed...very disturbing. Messiah-tastic!"
(June 15, 2007, http://www.b3ta.com/questions/worstsex/page4/)
Made-up citation: "Nothing makes me feel more messiah-tastic than saving lives. Or so I imagine. I get the same feeling from scratching my balls anyway."
Real citation: "The worst sex I've ever had? A girl that shouted 'Hallelujah!' when she climaxed...very disturbing. Messiah-tastic!"
(June 15, 2007, http://www.b3ta.com/questions/worstsex/page4/)
Made-up citation: "Nothing makes me feel more messiah-tastic than saving lives. Or so I imagine. I get the same feeling from scratching my balls anyway."
Friday, February 20, 2009
pizzazz-a-majiggy
noun. A hard to identify quality that laypeople often confuse with pizzazz.
Real citation: "I know, I know! You think spelling bees are boring and I keep writing about them, but this post has some pizzazz-a-majiggy!!! Today was an Angus Glen Community Centre's first annual spelling bee. I kinda lost somewhere in the second or third round! I got a lot of hard words. First word, caterpillar!!!!! First words are always the easiest! Man, I can't believe thst was my first word!!! The first person had to spell afraid and I get caterpillar?????!!!! People are crazy these days! That includes me!!!! SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!"
(Oct. 25, 2008, Monica's Sparkles of Fun, http://monicastar.blogspot.com/2008/10/spelling-bees-2.html)
Made-up citation: "I misplaced the pizzazz-a-majiggy... Do you think anyone will notice if I use my green-glowing-nano-slime-ammo-pack instead?"
Real citation: "I know, I know! You think spelling bees are boring and I keep writing about them, but this post has some pizzazz-a-majiggy!!! Today was an Angus Glen Community Centre's first annual spelling bee. I kinda lost somewhere in the second or third round! I got a lot of hard words. First word, caterpillar!!!!! First words are always the easiest! Man, I can't believe thst was my first word!!! The first person had to spell afraid and I get caterpillar?????!!!! People are crazy these days! That includes me!!!! SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!"
(Oct. 25, 2008, Monica's Sparkles of Fun, http://monicastar.blogspot.com/2008/10/spelling-bees-2.html)
Made-up citation: "I misplaced the pizzazz-a-majiggy... Do you think anyone will notice if I use my green-glowing-nano-slime-ammo-pack instead?"
sub-atomic wedgie
noun. A painful maneuver that can make even the micro-butted feel like a fat-ass.
Real citation: "It's ironic really, since it's believed that Baakar and Drolos were once agents of the Synod. Their gruesome sub-atomic wedgie spree crisscrossed the galaxies with no end in sight. Of course, they are not really on trial for those abominable acts but rather for the crimes of leaving Synod Books in the chamber pots of comfort stations along the way. Suffice it to say, the water was not pristine."
(July 31, 2007, John Cox Art, http://www.johncoxart.com/2007/07/introducing_3.html)
Made-up citation: "I went into particle physics so I could learn the secrets of the sub-atomic wedgie and the dreaded nano-noogie. Now I will bring this precious knowledge back to my people, who I shall then torture mercilessly."
Real citation: "It's ironic really, since it's believed that Baakar and Drolos were once agents of the Synod. Their gruesome sub-atomic wedgie spree crisscrossed the galaxies with no end in sight. Of course, they are not really on trial for those abominable acts but rather for the crimes of leaving Synod Books in the chamber pots of comfort stations along the way. Suffice it to say, the water was not pristine."
(July 31, 2007, John Cox Art, http://www.johncoxart.com/2007/07/introducing_3.html)
Made-up citation: "I went into particle physics so I could learn the secrets of the sub-atomic wedgie and the dreaded nano-noogie. Now I will bring this precious knowledge back to my people, who I shall then torture mercilessly."
Thursday, February 19, 2009
schmouch
interjection. A Yiddish ouch. Oy aaaaaiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee!
Real citation: "Ouch schmouch....check yours...I'll bet ya' it's the same!!!"
(Oct. 19, 2008, Totoya FJ Cruiser Forum, http://www.fjcruiserforums.com/forums/1165100-post109.html)
Made-up citation: "That's just a little schmouch--no need to worry. Nurse, hand me the drill with lox..."
Real citation: "Ouch schmouch....check yours...I'll bet ya' it's the same!!!"
(Oct. 19, 2008, Totoya FJ Cruiser Forum, http://www.fjcruiserforums.com/forums/1165100-post109.html)
Made-up citation: "That's just a little schmouch--no need to worry. Nurse, hand me the drill with lox..."
prosti-kitty
noun. That's a bad, bad kitty! Who taught Mister Snugglesworth to sell his body on the street?
Real citation: "Awesome kitten video. Mail kitty, trolley kitties, construction kitties, the kitty that jumps off that car when it's not supposed to, homeless kitty, prosti-kitty, dealer-kitty, fucked-up kitties, jay-walker kitty, club kitties, dj kitty... just awesome."
(May 18, 2006, The Locals Homepage, http://media.locals.ca/localsconf/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=70356&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=300)
Made-up citation: "When I was a kid in Buffalo, the big insult was 'Your mother works on Chippewa Street'. Now, Chippewa is gentrified and whore-free, except for a few prosti-kitties and two of my cousins."
Real citation: "Awesome kitten video. Mail kitty, trolley kitties, construction kitties, the kitty that jumps off that car when it's not supposed to, homeless kitty, prosti-kitty, dealer-kitty, fucked-up kitties, jay-walker kitty, club kitties, dj kitty... just awesome."
(May 18, 2006, The Locals Homepage, http://media.locals.ca/localsconf/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=70356&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=300)
Made-up citation: "When I was a kid in Buffalo, the big insult was 'Your mother works on Chippewa Street'. Now, Chippewa is gentrified and whore-free, except for a few prosti-kitties and two of my cousins."
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
mutineeringishly
adverb. Not a word anyone wants to see on their military record or first grade report card.
Real citation: "And I totally take back my rapisting of Kelly -- and am glad, because I like that actor. I knew he'd done something shady, but am delighted that he's not totally crap. Just slightly. Mutineeringishly."
(Feb. 6, 2009, "4-14: "Blood on the Scales" 2009.02.06," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3181936&view=findpost&p=11335958)
Made-up citation: "Sweet Veronica, if we were to get married again, I'd listen more. I'd make time for us. I'd comb my hair, even my back hair. And I would take 'mutineeringishly' out of our wedding vows, just for you."
Real citation: "And I totally take back my rapisting of Kelly -- and am glad, because I like that actor. I knew he'd done something shady, but am delighted that he's not totally crap. Just slightly. Mutineeringishly."
(Feb. 6, 2009, "4-14: "Blood on the Scales" 2009.02.06," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3181936&view=findpost&p=11335958)
Made-up citation: "Sweet Veronica, if we were to get married again, I'd listen more. I'd make time for us. I'd comb my hair, even my back hair. And I would take 'mutineeringishly' out of our wedding vows, just for you."
massage-gasm
noun. Mmm... Happy ending-ish.
Real citation: "So old crazy rich Frances Conroy calls up the country club and gets Carlos fired for giving her a massage-gasm."
(Nov. 20, 2008, The Children of St. Claire, http://childrenofsaintclare.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/desperate-housewives-57-and-58-what-more-do-i-need-and-city-on-fire/)
Made-up citation: "In massage school, I learned that massage-gasms are awkward for the massager, the massagee, and my cousin who cleans the tables."
Real citation: "So old crazy rich Frances Conroy calls up the country club and gets Carlos fired for giving her a massage-gasm."
(Nov. 20, 2008, The Children of St. Claire, http://childrenofsaintclare.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/desperate-housewives-57-and-58-what-more-do-i-need-and-city-on-fire/)
Made-up citation: "In massage school, I learned that massage-gasms are awkward for the massager, the massagee, and my cousin who cleans the tables."
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
the 20-tentacle tango
noun phrase. An exclusive form of sex.
Real citation: "Ah, February, that special time of the year when love is in the air and the heart turns toward romance. Or, in the case of the Southern California population of the market squid, that special time of year when giant underwater orgies are followed by immediate death. Never mind the stress of Valentine's Day gift shopping—what about the stress of fitting in the 20-tentacle tango before your inevitable demise?"
(Feb. 13, 2009, Miriam Goldstein, Slate, http://www.slate.com/id/2211343/)
Made-up citation: "I'm looking for a nice girl who values family and friends and experimentation. I'd love to try the dirty pancake or the 20-tentacle tango--or maybe a meal of food in a restaurant. No weird girls please."
Real citation: "Ah, February, that special time of the year when love is in the air and the heart turns toward romance. Or, in the case of the Southern California population of the market squid, that special time of year when giant underwater orgies are followed by immediate death. Never mind the stress of Valentine's Day gift shopping—what about the stress of fitting in the 20-tentacle tango before your inevitable demise?"
(Feb. 13, 2009, Miriam Goldstein, Slate, http://www.slate.com/id/2211343/)
Made-up citation: "I'm looking for a nice girl who values family and friends and experimentation. I'd love to try the dirty pancake or the 20-tentacle tango--or maybe a meal of food in a restaurant. No weird girls please."
false prophety
adj. Offensive to the will of God, the ethics of journalism, and the edicts of kindergarten teachers everywhere.
Real citation: "Now, stop yelling at your computer screen, don't give me that Angel didn't do an evil deed bullshnit. He did what we seem to do every election year, chose between two evils. On one hand you have perfect happiness, utopia, with the down sides of possibly being eaten by your savior and losing free will, on the other you have chaos, people going back to hating their lives and feeling empty and unfufilled, but oh yeah they get to choose that, and they may still be eaten by a beastie but just not a false prophety one."
(May 1, 2003, PeterDavid.net, http://www.malibulist.com/mt/mt-commentsantispam.cgi?entry_id=1081)
Made-up citation: "I sometimes come across a little false prophety, but I really think that rain of toads is coming today. My apocalypse sense is tingling."
Real citation: "Now, stop yelling at your computer screen, don't give me that Angel didn't do an evil deed bullshnit. He did what we seem to do every election year, chose between two evils. On one hand you have perfect happiness, utopia, with the down sides of possibly being eaten by your savior and losing free will, on the other you have chaos, people going back to hating their lives and feeling empty and unfufilled, but oh yeah they get to choose that, and they may still be eaten by a beastie but just not a false prophety one."
(May 1, 2003, PeterDavid.net, http://www.malibulist.com/mt/mt-commentsantispam.cgi?entry_id=1081)
Made-up citation: "I sometimes come across a little false prophety, but I really think that rain of toads is coming today. My apocalypse sense is tingling."
Monday, February 16, 2009
breastitudinous
adj. Boobitudinous, as they say in my culture.
Real citation: “I swear, Monday night was simply teaming with bodacious breastitudinous boobocity.”
(Bayani Domingo, Feb. 3, 2006, http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/columns/37479/Truth-B-Told-2.2.06:--To-Be-Continued....htm)
Made-up citation: "All earthly art can be divided into breastitudinous and non-breastitudinous, said the tenured art professor to a rapt audience of Martian elites."
Real citation: “I swear, Monday night was simply teaming with bodacious breastitudinous boobocity.”
(Bayani Domingo, Feb. 3, 2006, http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/columns/37479/Truth-B-Told-2.2.06:--To-Be-Continued....htm)
Made-up citation: "All earthly art can be divided into breastitudinous and non-breastitudinous, said the tenured art professor to a rapt audience of Martian elites."
octo-grandpa
noun. An older, maler counterpart to the octo-mom who's been inspiring so many families and maniacs.
Real citation: "Octo Mom's own mother has spoken out against her daughter and that she and her father were very against their daughter's decision to get implanted with her 6 remaining IVF embryos. Any sensible mother would be. I'm not sure if this is true but apparently Octo Grandpa has to go back to work to support his 14 grandkids since his daughter hasn't finished school to become a counselor (no that is not a joke, she wants to counsel other people!) I forget exactly what Octo Grandpa does (a mechanic maybe?) but it involves heading back to IRAQ of all places. That is the last place I'd want my dad to go!"
(Feb. 11, 2009, Amelie's European Adventures, http://amelieineurope.blogspot.com/2009/02/octo-mom.html)
Made-up citation: "I'd love to be an octo-grandpa when I get old. Or a firetruck."
Real citation: "Octo Mom's own mother has spoken out against her daughter and that she and her father were very against their daughter's decision to get implanted with her 6 remaining IVF embryos. Any sensible mother would be. I'm not sure if this is true but apparently Octo Grandpa has to go back to work to support his 14 grandkids since his daughter hasn't finished school to become a counselor (no that is not a joke, she wants to counsel other people!) I forget exactly what Octo Grandpa does (a mechanic maybe?) but it involves heading back to IRAQ of all places. That is the last place I'd want my dad to go!"
(Feb. 11, 2009, Amelie's European Adventures, http://amelieineurope.blogspot.com/2009/02/octo-mom.html)
Made-up citation: "I'd love to be an octo-grandpa when I get old. Or a firetruck."
Sunday, February 15, 2009
cy-kid
noun. A Cylon baby. Awwww, look at the little toaster...
Real citation: "I really hope the Saul/Caprica cy-kid is not some sort of Jesus/savior baby. The One-True-God and all that. Por favor. I also wondered why the frak Cavil couldn't download himself/create a machine body if he was so desperate to rid himself of his troublesome body."
(Feb. 14, 2009, "4-15: "No Exit" 2009.02.13," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3182208&view=findpost&p=11366526)
Made-up citation: "I'm not ready to have children, but maybe I could handle a cy-kid, especially if the little robo-tyke would walk my dog and brew coffee (hopefully, not in that order)."
Real citation: "I really hope the Saul/Caprica cy-kid is not some sort of Jesus/savior baby. The One-True-God and all that. Por favor. I also wondered why the frak Cavil couldn't download himself/create a machine body if he was so desperate to rid himself of his troublesome body."
(Feb. 14, 2009, "4-15: "No Exit" 2009.02.13," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3182208&view=findpost&p=11366526)
Made-up citation: "I'm not ready to have children, but maybe I could handle a cy-kid, especially if the little robo-tyke would walk my dog and brew coffee (hopefully, not in that order)."
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Phelpsianistic
adj. God-like! Or bong-water-soaked.
Real citation: "My favorite is phelpsian. I want to be phelpsianistic about my goals in life! 2009 will be a year of phelpsian strides. Write like you are phelpsian and you will succeed. (I wonder--do we have to capitalize phelpsian?)"
(Jan. 9, 2009, Cindy Scinto, Heart Felt News, http://cindyscinto.blogspot.com/)
Made-up citation: "When it comes to organ harvesting, I am downright Phelpsianistic. Eight kidneys in one night! Can Tiger Woods do that?"
Real citation: "My favorite is phelpsian. I want to be phelpsianistic about my goals in life! 2009 will be a year of phelpsian strides. Write like you are phelpsian and you will succeed. (I wonder--do we have to capitalize phelpsian?)"
(Jan. 9, 2009, Cindy Scinto, Heart Felt News, http://cindyscinto.blogspot.com/)
Made-up citation: "When it comes to organ harvesting, I am downright Phelpsianistic. Eight kidneys in one night! Can Tiger Woods do that?"
Friday, February 13, 2009
dorkamatron
noun. A dork's dork. Bork bork bork! Hey, how did the Swedish chef get in here?
Real citation: "Hello Dorkamatron! Im going to come over to your computer and correct your grammer!~!"
(Aug. 21, 2007, ABC Message Board, http://www2b.abc.net.au/tmb/Client/Message.aspx?b=59&t=3&a=0&ps=20&m=31755&dm=1)
Made-up citation: "When my love started calling me a damnable dorkamatron instead of her sugar-coated sex poodle, I knew we had a language problem that can't be solved by medication and word lists alone."
Real citation: "Hello Dorkamatron! Im going to come over to your computer and correct your grammer!~!"
(Aug. 21, 2007, ABC Message Board, http://www2b.abc.net.au/tmb/Client/Message.aspx?b=59&t=3&a=0&ps=20&m=31755&dm=1)
Made-up citation: "When my love started calling me a damnable dorkamatron instead of her sugar-coated sex poodle, I knew we had a language problem that can't be solved by medication and word lists alone."
OMGWTFBBQPOLARBEAR
exclamation. May accompany the WTFOMGTMDTLAARGBBQ?! face.
Real citation: "OMGWTFBBQPOLARBEAR!
That was pretty awesome. It felt very action packed, and there were some great moments. I loved the Frenchies. Hanging out with them was like being back in season 1."
(Feb. 11, 2009, "5-5: "This Place Is Death" 2009.02.11," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3182103&view=findpost&p=11355896)
Made-up citation: "My first word wasn't 'Mama' or 'Dad'. It was 'OMGWTFBBQPOLARBEAR'. I'm just kidding. My first word was actually a couple of sentences: 'Organ harvesting is my destiny. So it is written, and so it shall be. Got any candy?'"
Real citation: "OMGWTFBBQPOLARBEAR!
That was pretty awesome. It felt very action packed, and there were some great moments. I loved the Frenchies. Hanging out with them was like being back in season 1."
(Feb. 11, 2009, "5-5: "This Place Is Death" 2009.02.11," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3182103&view=findpost&p=11355896)
Made-up citation: "My first word wasn't 'Mama' or 'Dad'. It was 'OMGWTFBBQPOLARBEAR'. I'm just kidding. My first word was actually a couple of sentences: 'Organ harvesting is my destiny. So it is written, and so it shall be. Got any candy?'"
Thursday, February 12, 2009
de-pooifying
verb. It must be done, sometimes by a scooping technician.
Real citation: "It's not MY poo (I feel compelled to share) but it stinks very much, despite the soap and scrubbing I did the moment I discovered the smear on my thigh. You would think, perhaps, "Hey Dani? You work from home. Go downstairs to the laundry and get a new pair of jeans to put on, then you won't stink." And of course, nobody would argue that that makes the MOST sense....however, here I sit blogging about poo rather than de-pooifying myself."
(Dec. 3, 2008, Dani and the Naked Truth, http://daniandcrew.blogspot.com/2008/12/i-have-poo-on-my-jeans.html)
Made-up citation: "I'm tired of your whining and de-pooifying! I don't think you respect the boom-booms I make."
Real citation: "It's not MY poo (I feel compelled to share) but it stinks very much, despite the soap and scrubbing I did the moment I discovered the smear on my thigh. You would think, perhaps, "Hey Dani? You work from home. Go downstairs to the laundry and get a new pair of jeans to put on, then you won't stink." And of course, nobody would argue that that makes the MOST sense....however, here I sit blogging about poo rather than de-pooifying myself."
(Dec. 3, 2008, Dani and the Naked Truth, http://daniandcrew.blogspot.com/2008/12/i-have-poo-on-my-jeans.html)
Made-up citation: "I'm tired of your whining and de-pooifying! I don't think you respect the boom-booms I make."
Fiona Apple-of-the-month club
noun phrase. A club I'm unlikely to join without a talent infusion and a surgical intervention.
Real citation: "With her singer-songwriter pretensions grounded by trip-hop beats, Taja Sevelle comes off like a charter member of the Fiona Apple-of-the-month club."
(Nov. 21, 2007, Matt Diehl, Entertainment Weekly, http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,290387,00.html)
Made-up citation: "There are worse things than joining the Fiona Apple-of-the-month club. I've been in the Celine-Dion-of-the-week club since high school, and it's a terrible burden. Also, that South Park song is very hurtful."
Real citation: "With her singer-songwriter pretensions grounded by trip-hop beats, Taja Sevelle comes off like a charter member of the Fiona Apple-of-the-month club."
(Nov. 21, 2007, Matt Diehl, Entertainment Weekly, http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,290387,00.html)
Made-up citation: "There are worse things than joining the Fiona Apple-of-the-month club. I've been in the Celine-Dion-of-the-week club since high school, and it's a terrible burden. Also, that South Park song is very hurtful."
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
ann-coulterin'
verb. A sexual act that is only imaginary, thanks be to Zeus.
Real citation: "You mean straight people haven't heard of ear-holin' and nose-bangin' and socket-fuckin' and piss-slittin' and ann-coulterin'? You gotta get out more, DAWG."
(Dan Savage, Jan. 28, 2009, A.V. Club, http://www.avclub.com/articles/savage-love-january-28-2009,23114/)
Made-up citation: "Who's up for some ann-coulterin' this Valentine's Day? Put your hand down, Pop-pop! That's ishy."
Real citation: "You mean straight people haven't heard of ear-holin' and nose-bangin' and socket-fuckin' and piss-slittin' and ann-coulterin'? You gotta get out more, DAWG."
(Dan Savage, Jan. 28, 2009, A.V. Club, http://www.avclub.com/articles/savage-love-january-28-2009,23114/)
Made-up citation: "Who's up for some ann-coulterin' this Valentine's Day? Put your hand down, Pop-pop! That's ishy."
non-crapsack
adj. Noble, stalwart, and not at all crapsacky.
Real citation: "I must say, also having Gaile pop in so often to give input on what we have to say about the game is a large boost as well. I think we just have a great staff here and a non-crapsack community (not saying that all others are, but you know...GW Guru is the best)."
(March 15, 2005, Guild Wars Forums, http://www.guildwarsguru.com/forum/showthread.php?t=891)
Made-up: "I'm never going to qualify as a pillar of the community. But if I can make a name for myself as a non-crapsack ninny, my heart will burst with pride."
Real citation: "I must say, also having Gaile pop in so often to give input on what we have to say about the game is a large boost as well. I think we just have a great staff here and a non-crapsack community (not saying that all others are, but you know...GW Guru is the best)."
(March 15, 2005, Guild Wars Forums, http://www.guildwarsguru.com/forum/showthread.php?t=891)
Made-up: "I'm never going to qualify as a pillar of the community. But if I can make a name for myself as a non-crapsack ninny, my heart will burst with pride."
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
parental eunuch
noun. A parental unit that (evidently) became parental through petri dishes, witchcraft, or old-fashioned legos.
Real citation: "She's not fat, and she's not skinny--she's right inbetween and perfect, I'll let you have that much. But in return, you give me her mind. It's in there, let me reassure you--you have to take my word for it, because that's your payment to me. You have to believe that right now she's pondering what the fuck's going on in her life, just like you do. She wants to know why guys treat her like dirt, or whether that guy's married, or how much more bullshit she can take from the job, the school, the parental eunuchs. She's just like you--but UNLIKE you she's beating herself over the head because of it."
(Sept. 21, 2005, http://users.frii.com/bmozart/noise/girlmoza.txt)
Made-up citation: "In my culture, we respect our parental eunuchs by splitting the take on our meth labs with them. I wouldn't even be in this meth lab if not for my parents, so it just seems right."
Real citation: "She's not fat, and she's not skinny--she's right inbetween and perfect, I'll let you have that much. But in return, you give me her mind. It's in there, let me reassure you--you have to take my word for it, because that's your payment to me. You have to believe that right now she's pondering what the fuck's going on in her life, just like you do. She wants to know why guys treat her like dirt, or whether that guy's married, or how much more bullshit she can take from the job, the school, the parental eunuchs. She's just like you--but UNLIKE you she's beating herself over the head because of it."
(Sept. 21, 2005, http://users.frii.com/bmozart/noise/girlmoza.txt)
Made-up citation: "In my culture, we respect our parental eunuchs by splitting the take on our meth labs with them. I wouldn't even be in this meth lab if not for my parents, so it just seems right."
ginormously fugged out crevice cleavage syndrome
noun phrase. I'm no doctor, but that almost sounds insulting.
Real citation: "Upon further inspection it appears you are suffering from the same affliction that has plagued Star Jones and Vivica A. Fox. 'Ginormously Fugged Out Crevice Cleavage Syndrome' is no joke Janet. You will receive a score of 3. If you show some improvement and get those hard masses you pretend to be boobs fixed, I may increase your score. Please consult Dr. Ray from 'Dr. 90210.' Until then you are on probabtion!"
(June 9, 2006, DC Pussycat Doll, http://dcpcdoll.blogspot.com/2006/06/friday-boobies-ms-dior-if-youre-nasty.html)
Made-up citation: "The argument of my new book is simple: ginormously fugged out crevice cleavage syndrome is the only thing standing between us and peace on earth. Some say I am cuckoo for world peace puffs, but I haven't eaten cereal since 1954."
Real citation: "Upon further inspection it appears you are suffering from the same affliction that has plagued Star Jones and Vivica A. Fox. 'Ginormously Fugged Out Crevice Cleavage Syndrome' is no joke Janet. You will receive a score of 3. If you show some improvement and get those hard masses you pretend to be boobs fixed, I may increase your score. Please consult Dr. Ray from 'Dr. 90210.' Until then you are on probabtion!"
(June 9, 2006, DC Pussycat Doll, http://dcpcdoll.blogspot.com/2006/06/friday-boobies-ms-dior-if-youre-nasty.html)
Made-up citation: "The argument of my new book is simple: ginormously fugged out crevice cleavage syndrome is the only thing standing between us and peace on earth. Some say I am cuckoo for world peace puffs, but I haven't eaten cereal since 1954."
Monday, February 09, 2009
Elmer Fuddistic
adj. If your white whale is a wascally wabbit, this could apply to you.
"I see we're already getting expatriates from Da Bear's Forum reappearing back here on DR. Does
that mean that we'll go back to getting endless threads about: 1) How Jews cause all world
badness, 2) What caliber rifle we should have for Mad Max World, 3) The Fibonacci numbers
of the gold chart, 4) Why 'statists' should all be shot, 5) Why education is 'worthless', and other Elmer Fuddistic doo-doo? "
(Oct. 5, 2008, The Daily Reckoning, http://2cents.dailyreckoning.com/viewtopic.php?p=415193&sid=3c73c94ad78faa35d1b1e3a3e100fc6a)
Made-up citation: "Of all the handsome crimefighters in the tri-state area, I am, regretfully, the most Elmer Fuddistic. It's because I keep shooting innocents--instead of evildoers and dastardly ducks--in the face."
"I see we're already getting expatriates from Da Bear's Forum reappearing back here on DR. Does
that mean that we'll go back to getting endless threads about: 1) How Jews cause all world
badness, 2) What caliber rifle we should have for Mad Max World, 3) The Fibonacci numbers
of the gold chart, 4) Why 'statists' should all be shot, 5) Why education is 'worthless', and other Elmer Fuddistic doo-doo? "
(Oct. 5, 2008, The Daily Reckoning, http://2cents.dailyreckoning.com/viewtopic.php?p=415193&sid=3c73c94ad78faa35d1b1e3a3e100fc6a)
Made-up citation: "Of all the handsome crimefighters in the tri-state area, I am, regretfully, the most Elmer Fuddistic. It's because I keep shooting innocents--instead of evildoers and dastardly ducks--in the face."
Dejavu-istan
noun. I think I've been here before...
Real citation: "Dejavu-istan"
(Aug. 30, 2008, Speak, Peppery, http://www.speakpeppery.com/?p=796)
Made-up citation: "For me, Mars will always be Dejavu-istan... I spent so many summers there killing warlords and blowing up moons. Also, the red planet has the best bed and breakfasts."
Real citation: "Dejavu-istan"
(Aug. 30, 2008, Speak, Peppery, http://www.speakpeppery.com/?p=796)
Made-up citation: "For me, Mars will always be Dejavu-istan... I spent so many summers there killing warlords and blowing up moons. Also, the red planet has the best bed and breakfasts."
Sunday, February 08, 2009
dungeon-doom-apocalypseness
noun. Not exactly a puppy-and-rainbow-fest, I reckon.
Real citation: "By the way why should every uber-symphonic metal I ever encountered always themed on the same old same oldness of dungeon-doom-apocalypseness?? What about other mundane concept? Going to the park; Going fishing; a visit to your gramps; bills, etc."
(Sept. 15, 2008, Mew, http://forums.mewsite.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=7005&p=304701)
Made-up citation: "You may think it's my hair and reputation that attract the ladies, but think again: It's the soulful dungeon-doom-apocalypseness that all women and some female wombats can see in my eyes."
Real citation: "By the way why should every uber-symphonic metal I ever encountered always themed on the same old same oldness of dungeon-doom-apocalypseness?? What about other mundane concept? Going to the park; Going fishing; a visit to your gramps; bills, etc."
(Sept. 15, 2008, Mew, http://forums.mewsite.com/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=7005&p=304701)
Made-up citation: "You may think it's my hair and reputation that attract the ladies, but think again: It's the soulful dungeon-doom-apocalypseness that all women and some female wombats can see in my eyes."
Saturday, February 07, 2009
re-diddly-damn-diculous
adj. Pre-diddly-doodly-posterous.
Real citation: "Kalok: Don't Get all EMO. You say stupid Shit when you're Emo. And you don't Want to Put words in their Mouths. Warren Does think it's Funny because you are Being Re-diddly-damn-Diculous! You and your Fucking 'I am a Monster' issues."
(Nov. 3, 2006, Livejournal, http://amenoch.livejournal.com/3762.html)
Made-up citation: "Many elements of Battlestar Galactica are re-diddly-damn-diculous, but...man. I feel like I need a cigarette after watching an episode. Did I type that out loud?"
Real citation: "Kalok: Don't Get all EMO. You say stupid Shit when you're Emo. And you don't Want to Put words in their Mouths. Warren Does think it's Funny because you are Being Re-diddly-damn-Diculous! You and your Fucking 'I am a Monster' issues."
(Nov. 3, 2006, Livejournal, http://amenoch.livejournal.com/3762.html)
Made-up citation: "Many elements of Battlestar Galactica are re-diddly-damn-diculous, but...man. I feel like I need a cigarette after watching an episode. Did I type that out loud?"
Friday, February 06, 2009
testosto-bot
noun. A robot with balls. Or at least what biologists call "ball juice".
"In grade school in the 60s, we had only one male teacher. Except for the gym teachers. They had the weakling-terrifying names of Mr. Dick and Mr. Harold Garilla – yes, Hairy Gorilla – but you expected the phys-ed teachers to be barking testosto-bots. All the other teachers, except for fifth grade, were women."
(Sept. 27, 2007, buzz.mn, http://www.buzz.mn/?q=node/2620)
Made-up citation: "I'm taking my testosto-bot back to Target. It took my lunch money, stole my wife, and provided a role model for my sons. That's unacceptable."
"In grade school in the 60s, we had only one male teacher. Except for the gym teachers. They had the weakling-terrifying names of Mr. Dick and Mr. Harold Garilla – yes, Hairy Gorilla – but you expected the phys-ed teachers to be barking testosto-bots. All the other teachers, except for fifth grade, were women."
(Sept. 27, 2007, buzz.mn, http://www.buzz.mn/?q=node/2620)
Made-up citation: "I'm taking my testosto-bot back to Target. It took my lunch money, stole my wife, and provided a role model for my sons. That's unacceptable."
Thursday, February 05, 2009
Snuggie-ological
adj. In my day, we called it "straitjacket-ish".
Real citation: "Snuggie-ological Implications
So far, 4 million 'blankets with sleeves' have been sold. Perhaps this is a sign that the comfortable backward-robe has been brilliantly marketed to perfection -- to college students, hipsters and others who love its kitsch factor."
(Feb. 2, 2009, Laura Gilbert, Lemondrop, http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/02/02/snuggie-love-reaches-saturation-point/)
Made-up citation: "I know little of the Snuggie-ological arts. When I was a swaddling infant, blankets didn't have sleeves or tentacles or CIA chips implanted in the tag, and we made do anyway."
Real citation: "Snuggie-ological Implications
So far, 4 million 'blankets with sleeves' have been sold. Perhaps this is a sign that the comfortable backward-robe has been brilliantly marketed to perfection -- to college students, hipsters and others who love its kitsch factor."
(Feb. 2, 2009, Laura Gilbert, Lemondrop, http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/02/02/snuggie-love-reaches-saturation-point/)
Made-up citation: "I know little of the Snuggie-ological arts. When I was a swaddling infant, blankets didn't have sleeves or tentacles or CIA chips implanted in the tag, and we made do anyway."
spokes-werewolf
noun. A terrifying man-wolf (or woman-wolf) with professional speaking responsibilities. Everyone has two jobs these days.
Real citation: "'What in hell are you?' the spokes-werewolf was taken aback.
'The tail is new,' Roxas noted at the same time."
(July 6, 2008, FanFiction.net, http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4374473/2/Serenade_of_Sunlight)
Made-up citation: "The search committee would like to hire a spokes-werewolf, but we'll settle for a pit bull that can sit pretty. Times are tough."
Real citation: "'What in hell are you?' the spokes-werewolf was taken aback.
'The tail is new,' Roxas noted at the same time."
(July 6, 2008, FanFiction.net, http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4374473/2/Serenade_of_Sunlight)
Made-up citation: "The search committee would like to hire a spokes-werewolf, but we'll settle for a pit bull that can sit pretty. Times are tough."
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
scum-bucket-head
noun. A close relative of the scumbucketface.
Real citation: "So I just got off the phone with Mrs. Crowe, who... I miss... SOOO MUCH, and she called to give me a hard time about the fact she was supposed to be called by a bunch of girls Friday night but wasn't (looong story) and I completely feel like a scum-bucket-head!!! Not just for that, but also becuase I haven't spoken to her for the past 3 days!!! Am I awful, or what?! =O I KNOW! That aside, the two of them are doing well in their new appartment in Minnesota, yay, and I'm hoping Mrs. Crowe will start her own Blogger while she's there, only... she doesn't have inernet... LOL."
(July 21, 2008, The Randomness of Me, http://sammie-therandomnessofme.blogspot.com/2008/07/crowes-say-hi.html)
Made-up citation: "Inside every scum-bucket-head is a scum-rainbow-head, according to my life coach."
Real citation: "So I just got off the phone with Mrs. Crowe, who... I miss... SOOO MUCH, and she called to give me a hard time about the fact she was supposed to be called by a bunch of girls Friday night but wasn't (looong story) and I completely feel like a scum-bucket-head!!! Not just for that, but also becuase I haven't spoken to her for the past 3 days!!! Am I awful, or what?! =O I KNOW! That aside, the two of them are doing well in their new appartment in Minnesota, yay, and I'm hoping Mrs. Crowe will start her own Blogger while she's there, only... she doesn't have inernet... LOL."
(July 21, 2008, The Randomness of Me, http://sammie-therandomnessofme.blogspot.com/2008/07/crowes-say-hi.html)
Made-up citation: "Inside every scum-bucket-head is a scum-rainbow-head, according to my life coach."
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
Empire Strikes Back-itis
noun. Considering that this movie was the highlight of my childhood, I can't imagine a more wonderful disease, except maybe catastrophic chocolate mint cookie dough ice cream trauma.
Real citation: "By the way, is anyone else feeling a case of the 'Empire Strikes Back-itis'?oh and McG ripped on TF1 lol"
(Feb. 1, 2009, FirstShowing,net, http://www.firstshowing.net/2009/01/31/it-has-arrived-transformers-revenge-of-the-fallen-super-bowl-trailer/)
Made-up citation: "As a doctor, I often diagnose Empire Strikes Back-itis in patients, only to find out through a colleague or lawsuit it was herpes. This is why national healthcare will never work."
Made-up citation: "As a doctor, I often diagnose Empire Strikes Back-itis in patients, only to find out through a colleague or lawsuit it was herpes. This is why national healthcare will never work."
Monday, February 02, 2009
ear-flap-based
adj. Entirely distinct from the ear-wax-based arts and sciences.
Real citation: “To echo Laplace, in fact, I would say that there are many, many persauasive arguments against Stalin worship, but that the anti-Stalin case is fully valid without Mr. Chambers’s ear-flap-based assumption.”
(Christopher Hitchens, God is not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything, page 79)
Made-up citation: "My ear-flap-based nachos were not a hit during the Super Bowl. I think I need to find a new cult."
Real citation: “To echo Laplace, in fact, I would say that there are many, many persauasive arguments against Stalin worship, but that the anti-Stalin case is fully valid without Mr. Chambers’s ear-flap-based assumption.”
(Christopher Hitchens, God is not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything, page 79)
Made-up citation: "My ear-flap-based nachos were not a hit during the Super Bowl. I think I need to find a new cult."
motherexpletiver
noun. Caution: May not refer to a mother-help-across-the-street-er.
Real citation: "i had a small one done to me, but it was good though. me and one of the tech's are always at war with each other. he didnt waste anytime. he comes into work at 8, and immediately comes up to me and says did frank talk to you yet(my boss, and i was off yesterday). so i said no what goin on. he tells me that they're gonna transfer me to another store, one that sees noooooooooooo kind of business what so ever. im flat rate so thats a nightmare. so im walking around the next half hour just saying stuff like expletive this and expletive that, im gonna quit. he lets me mope for about a half hour and with a smirk asks me what day is it. i say its april 1st, its april foo.......you motherexpletiver! you couldn't even say good morning first."
(April 2, 2008, TunerFriends, http://www.tunerfriends.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-12138.html)
Made-up citation: "I am a bad motherexpletiver. Not everyone knows that. Under this professorial cardigan beats the heart of a Viking crossed with a wombat hopped up on steroids and pixie sticks, with tremendous street cred."
Real citation: "i had a small one done to me, but it was good though. me and one of the tech's are always at war with each other. he didnt waste anytime. he comes into work at 8, and immediately comes up to me and says did frank talk to you yet(my boss, and i was off yesterday). so i said no what goin on. he tells me that they're gonna transfer me to another store, one that sees noooooooooooo kind of business what so ever. im flat rate so thats a nightmare. so im walking around the next half hour just saying stuff like expletive this and expletive that, im gonna quit. he lets me mope for about a half hour and with a smirk asks me what day is it. i say its april 1st, its april foo.......you motherexpletiver! you couldn't even say good morning first."
(April 2, 2008, TunerFriends, http://www.tunerfriends.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-12138.html)
Made-up citation: "I am a bad motherexpletiver. Not everyone knows that. Under this professorial cardigan beats the heart of a Viking crossed with a wombat hopped up on steroids and pixie sticks, with tremendous street cred."
Sunday, February 01, 2009
reverse-psycho-babble-ology-ish
adj. I am too psyched out to define this one. *backs out of room slowly*
Real citation: "He gulped. 'Yeah... every word. What about you? I mean, is your sister right about reverse-psycho-bable-ology-ish stuff and whatnot?'"
(Nov. 5, 2002, FanFiction.net, http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1051198/2/Maybe_thats_the_problem_then)
Made-up citation: "I like my therapists like I like my polar bears: reverse-psycho-babble-ology-ish and heavily sedated."
Real citation: "He gulped. 'Yeah... every word. What about you? I mean, is your sister right about reverse-psycho-bable-ology-ish stuff and whatnot?'"
(Nov. 5, 2002, FanFiction.net, http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1051198/2/Maybe_thats_the_problem_then)
Made-up citation: "I like my therapists like I like my polar bears: reverse-psycho-babble-ology-ish and heavily sedated."
Saturday, January 31, 2009
kaboomlessness
noun. A non-kaboomy condition that will likely never be universal, because of those two-legged varmints called "people" you may have noticed around these parts.
Real citation: "Kaboomlessness
Thank goodness the baserunner in this photograph is not A-Rod. Otherwise, we'd probably never hear the end of it:"
(June 2, 2007, Catfish Stew, http://catfishstew.baseballtoaster.com/archives/681475.html)
Made-up citation: "When the Martians represent humanity in their finest museum, they will erect a statue of an earthwad praying for kaboomlessness while setting off a suitcase nuke. Martian warlord children on field trips will love it."
Real citation: "Kaboomlessness
Thank goodness the baserunner in this photograph is not A-Rod. Otherwise, we'd probably never hear the end of it:"
(June 2, 2007, Catfish Stew, http://catfishstew.baseballtoaster.com/archives/681475.html)
Made-up citation: "When the Martians represent humanity in their finest museum, they will erect a statue of an earthwad praying for kaboomlessness while setting off a suitcase nuke. Martian warlord children on field trips will love it."
Friday, January 30, 2009
on-crack-itude
noun. Someone's cuckoo for crack puffs...
Real citation: "Instead of sleeping, spent several hours panicking about...well, everything in the world, pretty much. Mostly just the usual ('Am I nebbish and spineless? No, wait, am I an overbearing and horrible person? Or is it possible that several people whose opinions I once trusted are actually just on crack, and maybe I'm just a good and flawed and normal person who should accept their basic on-crack-itude?')"
(Sept. 7, 2005, Sarah NotTheDishes, http://sarahpi.livejournal.com/209104.html)
Made-up citation: "It is so nice to have a President with such a small on-crack-itude quotient... After having the coyotes running the road runner preserve for so long, it's refreshing."
Real citation: "Instead of sleeping, spent several hours panicking about...well, everything in the world, pretty much. Mostly just the usual ('Am I nebbish and spineless? No, wait, am I an overbearing and horrible person? Or is it possible that several people whose opinions I once trusted are actually just on crack, and maybe I'm just a good and flawed and normal person who should accept their basic on-crack-itude?')"
(Sept. 7, 2005, Sarah NotTheDishes, http://sarahpi.livejournal.com/209104.html)
Made-up citation: "It is so nice to have a President with such a small on-crack-itude quotient... After having the coyotes running the road runner preserve for so long, it's refreshing."
Thursday, January 29, 2009
suckassability
noun. Verily, 'tis a pestilence, though more slangy.
Real citation: "So, I know I thought summer was going to blow and it kind of still will have a bit of blow-esque-ness to it, but I am looking forward to it. I think its suckassability will be vastly dampened by my undying urge to get the fuck of out school. Finally getting rid of that sophomore attitude will make every day beautiful in its own right."
(April 22, 2008, Livejournal, http://spiltfromme.livejournal.com/)
Made-up citation: "This is my fourth winter in Chicago, and it has had the most snow, cold, and general suckassability--three things I have a high tolerance for, being from Buffalo."
Real citation: "So, I know I thought summer was going to blow and it kind of still will have a bit of blow-esque-ness to it, but I am looking forward to it. I think its suckassability will be vastly dampened by my undying urge to get the fuck of out school. Finally getting rid of that sophomore attitude will make every day beautiful in its own right."
(April 22, 2008, Livejournal, http://spiltfromme.livejournal.com/)
Made-up citation: "This is my fourth winter in Chicago, and it has had the most snow, cold, and general suckassability--three things I have a high tolerance for, being from Buffalo."
non-diddly-squat-doing
adj. Inactive, ineffective, in-diddly-etc.
Real citation: "first off, i'd like to raise a virtual glass to my friend rich who FINALLY got the rights to happyrobot.com. you see, he's owned the dot org and the dot net addresses for a while now but has had to deal with non-diddly-squat-doing squatters on the dot net address."
(Oct. 16, 2003, House Arrest, http://www.ashidome.com/blogger/housearrest_link.asp?c=531)
Made-up citation: "Who's better? A non-diddly-squat-doing nun or a post-Janet-Jackson’s-breast priest? Only the Pope knows for sure, and he's not talking."
Real citation: "first off, i'd like to raise a virtual glass to my friend rich who FINALLY got the rights to happyrobot.com. you see, he's owned the dot org and the dot net addresses for a while now but has had to deal with non-diddly-squat-doing squatters on the dot net address."
(Oct. 16, 2003, House Arrest, http://www.ashidome.com/blogger/housearrest_link.asp?c=531)
Made-up citation: "Who's better? A non-diddly-squat-doing nun or a post-Janet-Jackson’s-breast priest? Only the Pope knows for sure, and he's not talking."
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
celebu-crotch
noun. Oh famous groin. Oh happy day!
Real citation: "So here's the upshot. We have been trying to overcome our unhealthy obsession with famous sin-zones. After Sharon Stone assailed us with her vaginal tsunami and her cat-woman anatomy lesson, we sought therapy. When Agent Scully was stricken with a bizarre case of uterine worm-hole, we found solace in Jesus and vodka. And when Adrian Grenier went commando in his spandex Richard Simmons Jazzercise pants, we consulted the I Ching and sacrificed a goat to beelzebub. In short, we are doing our damnedest to heal our unnatural preoccupation with celebu-crotch. So why are you doing this to us?"
(Jan. 26, 2009, Can O' Whup-Ass, http://canofwhupass.typepad.com/my_weblog/2009/01/a-brief-note-of-friendly-concern-dear-sigourney-weaver.html)
Made-up citation: "My crotch is so sad. It will never be a celebu-crotch. Except to your mom."
Real citation: "So here's the upshot. We have been trying to overcome our unhealthy obsession with famous sin-zones. After Sharon Stone assailed us with her vaginal tsunami and her cat-woman anatomy lesson, we sought therapy. When Agent Scully was stricken with a bizarre case of uterine worm-hole, we found solace in Jesus and vodka. And when Adrian Grenier went commando in his spandex Richard Simmons Jazzercise pants, we consulted the I Ching and sacrificed a goat to beelzebub. In short, we are doing our damnedest to heal our unnatural preoccupation with celebu-crotch. So why are you doing this to us?"
(Jan. 26, 2009, Can O' Whup-Ass, http://canofwhupass.typepad.com/my_weblog/2009/01/a-brief-note-of-friendly-concern-dear-sigourney-weaver.html)
Made-up citation: "My crotch is so sad. It will never be a celebu-crotch. Except to your mom."
techno-dweebistic
adj. Far less delicious than choco-dweebistic.
Real citation: "Sorry about that. I feel better now. I just had a nice piece of chocolate with a glass of red wine. Mmmmmm. That hit the spot. A big, tannic California Cab and a bit of dark chocolate... Ahhhhhhhhhh... It doesn't get much better than that... Wine and chocolate combine to form a nearly erotic taste sensation that is almost indescribable. I could eat chocolate with wine every night. Wait, I do eat chocolate with wine nearly every night. That would explain a few things... like my evolving XXL wardrobe... Anyway, as the journalistic and techno-dweebistic foundation behind this site, you know that I'm going to give you my take on the whole wine and chocolate phenomenon. After all, it's not like THE BOB is going to explain it to you !!! NO!!! NOT MR. V.I.P. BIGSHOT WINOBOB!!! NOOOO!!! (Sorry... .must have... more... chocolate...)"
(March 15, 2003, What's New, http://www.winostuff.com/whats_new.htm)
Made-up citation: "I'm minimally techno-dweebistic when it comes to recreation... Ms. Pacman is still my favorite video game, maybe because it's such a perfect allegory for the middle east."
Real citation: "Sorry about that. I feel better now. I just had a nice piece of chocolate with a glass of red wine. Mmmmmm. That hit the spot. A big, tannic California Cab and a bit of dark chocolate... Ahhhhhhhhhh... It doesn't get much better than that... Wine and chocolate combine to form a nearly erotic taste sensation that is almost indescribable. I could eat chocolate with wine every night. Wait, I do eat chocolate with wine nearly every night. That would explain a few things... like my evolving XXL wardrobe... Anyway, as the journalistic and techno-dweebistic foundation behind this site, you know that I'm going to give you my take on the whole wine and chocolate phenomenon. After all, it's not like THE BOB is going to explain it to you !!! NO!!! NOT MR. V.I.P. BIGSHOT WINOBOB!!! NOOOO!!! (Sorry... .must have... more... chocolate...)"
(March 15, 2003, What's New, http://www.winostuff.com/whats_new.htm)
Made-up citation: "I'm minimally techno-dweebistic when it comes to recreation... Ms. Pacman is still my favorite video game, maybe because it's such a perfect allegory for the middle east."
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
womanpanzee
noun. A chimp with feminine charms. And wiles!
Real citation: "If you are an undercover human and meet Antonio Santana, tell him you are a
member of the Watchtower's secret police looking for people to excommunicate.
Turn him in anyways. Works best if you are an undercover Womanpanzee(tm)."
(Sept. 1, 2000, Yahoo Groups, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/creationevolutiondebate/message/190)
Made-up citation: "Studies show women are aroused by the sight of sexual relations between two men, two women, three men, four meerkats, or a womanpanzee and a caveman. Men are aroused by space battles and lugnuts. So what is it that brings men and women together? About nine beers, researchers say."
Real citation: "If you are an undercover human and meet Antonio Santana, tell him you are a
member of the Watchtower's secret police looking for people to excommunicate.
Turn him in anyways. Works best if you are an undercover Womanpanzee(tm)."
(Sept. 1, 2000, Yahoo Groups, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/creationevolutiondebate/message/190)
Made-up citation: "Studies show women are aroused by the sight of sexual relations between two men, two women, three men, four meerkats, or a womanpanzee and a caveman. Men are aroused by space battles and lugnuts. So what is it that brings men and women together? About nine beers, researchers say."
Monday, January 26, 2009
meat-splosive
adj. Highly correlated with subsequent heart-splosive events.
Real citation: "One of my favorite sandwiches is the meat-splosive Spicy Rizzak made of 50% sliced turkey, 25% crispy bacon, and 25% tomato and onion coated in melted cheddar and hot chipotle mayo, all neatly tucked in a soft and crusty, toasted sesame semolina hero roll. It only comes in a large size, unlike most of their other hot sandwiches that come in small or large. While I always get a small for any sandwich that has that option—it's the perfect size, not too big or small—I never have a problem polishing off a large Spicy Rizzak."
(Jan. 13, 2009, Serious Eats: New York, http://newyork.seriouseats.com/2009/01/tinys-giant-sandwich-shop-lower-east-side-nyc-spicy-rizzak-veggies.html)
Made-up citation: "I'm switching to a meat-splosive diet. True, the constant, caveman-esque consumption of meat does pack on a few pounds, but the quarterly combustive kabooms take it right off."
Real citation: "One of my favorite sandwiches is the meat-splosive Spicy Rizzak made of 50% sliced turkey, 25% crispy bacon, and 25% tomato and onion coated in melted cheddar and hot chipotle mayo, all neatly tucked in a soft and crusty, toasted sesame semolina hero roll. It only comes in a large size, unlike most of their other hot sandwiches that come in small or large. While I always get a small for any sandwich that has that option—it's the perfect size, not too big or small—I never have a problem polishing off a large Spicy Rizzak."
(Jan. 13, 2009, Serious Eats: New York, http://newyork.seriouseats.com/2009/01/tinys-giant-sandwich-shop-lower-east-side-nyc-spicy-rizzak-veggies.html)
Made-up citation: "I'm switching to a meat-splosive diet. True, the constant, caveman-esque consumption of meat does pack on a few pounds, but the quarterly combustive kabooms take it right off."
robo-gams
noun. These legs go all the way down to the floor, where they crush the head of a disobedient human swine!
Real citation: "Get a load of those robo-gams!"
(March 1, 2007, CNET, http://news.cnet.com/8301-17938_105-9692855-1.html?tag=mncol;title)
Made-up citation: "At the robotics institute, I learned than only fembots have robo-gams, and they are always 'nice'--even on a femkillbot."
Real citation: "Get a load of those robo-gams!"
(March 1, 2007, CNET, http://news.cnet.com/8301-17938_105-9692855-1.html?tag=mncol;title)
Made-up citation: "At the robotics institute, I learned than only fembots have robo-gams, and they are always 'nice'--even on a femkillbot."
Sunday, January 25, 2009
synergy-y
adj. This word's stock is sure to go up. Can't you feel the synergy?
Real citation: "yes? no? maybe? should i not fill all my slots with weird stuff, or do yall think makin a weird hybrid could work? i thought the mindslaver went good, but im not sure if its overkill. it seemed all synergy-y with time vault tho. thoughts appreciated. :)"
(Oct. 24, 2005, Wizards Community, http://forums.gleemax.com/wotc_archive/index.php/t-524320.html)
Made-up citation: "I have known people with a synergy-y vocabulary, just like Alec Baldwin on 30 Rock. It is frightening. Last time I met one of these folks, I cried and wet myself, two moist responses to pressure that produced no synergy at all."
Real citation: "yes? no? maybe? should i not fill all my slots with weird stuff, or do yall think makin a weird hybrid could work? i thought the mindslaver went good, but im not sure if its overkill. it seemed all synergy-y with time vault tho. thoughts appreciated. :)"
(Oct. 24, 2005, Wizards Community, http://forums.gleemax.com/wotc_archive/index.php/t-524320.html)
Made-up citation: "I have known people with a synergy-y vocabulary, just like Alec Baldwin on 30 Rock. It is frightening. Last time I met one of these folks, I cried and wet myself, two moist responses to pressure that produced no synergy at all."
Saturday, January 24, 2009
dad-blower-upper
noun. An ingrate who means business.
Real citation: "Kate: 'What kind of a person do you think I am?'
Sun: 'Umm, a dad-blower-upper?'"
(Jan. 22, 2009, "5-2: "The Lie" 2009.01.21," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3181218&view=findpost&p=11272347)
Made-up citation: "I pitched a movie about dads vs. dad-blower-uppers, but I lost out to a script pitting vampire robots against zombie pirates. In my revision, I think I'll make the dads into gay terrorists and the blow-uppy crowd can be pregnant aliens. That should spice things up."
Real citation: "Kate: 'What kind of a person do you think I am?'
Sun: 'Umm, a dad-blower-upper?'"
(Jan. 22, 2009, "5-2: "The Lie" 2009.01.21," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3181218&view=findpost&p=11272347)
Made-up citation: "I pitched a movie about dads vs. dad-blower-uppers, but I lost out to a script pitting vampire robots against zombie pirates. In my revision, I think I'll make the dads into gay terrorists and the blow-uppy crowd can be pregnant aliens. That should spice things up."
Friday, January 23, 2009
crapstitute
noun. 1. An institute of poor quality. 2. A sex worker who is just ew.
Real citation: "Currently at the crapstitute. About to embark upon a summer of hard work as the ultimate apprentice according to Miss O'Kane. "
(Nikki Armstrong, http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=481435240)
Made-up citation: "I attended the finest crapstitutes of higher education, but I learned everything I know about business on the streets, where I fought for my life every day, like a sea kitten out of water."
Real citation: "Currently at the crapstitute. About to embark upon a summer of hard work as the ultimate apprentice according to Miss O'Kane. "
(Nikki Armstrong, http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=481435240)
Made-up citation: "I attended the finest crapstitutes of higher education, but I learned everything I know about business on the streets, where I fought for my life every day, like a sea kitten out of water."
that-guy-palooza
noun. Sweet mother Mary on a motorboat, it's that guy!
Real citation: "Valkyrie's That-Guy-Palooza
War movies are That-Guy magnets. (That Guys or Gals are those ubiquitous character actors whose faces you always recognize in bit parts--'oh, it's That Guy!'--but whose names you rarely remember.) It's not surprising--when you have large casts of folks in uniform with the same haircuts, it's important to cast faces with instant character."
(Jan. 8, 2009, Red Blog, http://blog.redbox.com/redblog/2009/01/valkyries-that.html)
Made-up citation: "Everyone is in this movie. I haven't seen such a that-guy-palooza since I left your mom's last night. Did I say that out loud?"
Real citation: "Valkyrie's That-Guy-Palooza
War movies are That-Guy magnets. (That Guys or Gals are those ubiquitous character actors whose faces you always recognize in bit parts--'oh, it's That Guy!'--but whose names you rarely remember.) It's not surprising--when you have large casts of folks in uniform with the same haircuts, it's important to cast faces with instant character."
(Jan. 8, 2009, Red Blog, http://blog.redbox.com/redblog/2009/01/valkyries-that.html)
Made-up citation: "Everyone is in this movie. I haven't seen such a that-guy-palooza since I left your mom's last night. Did I say that out loud?"
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Batman-Begins-ification
noun. The kind of reboot every life needs periodically, like when I went through my own mauve-yet-gritty spandex rebirth in 2001.
Real citation: "I think Tomb Raider really needs a Batman-Begins-ification. Reset the story, show how Lara came to be and give us a story arch about her that is grounded a little more in reality with less magic, monsters and dinosaurs. The stuff that they started to do with Tomb Raider: Legend was good, but could be better. And put some damn clothes on!"
(Jan. 9, 2009, GameCyte, http://www.gamecyte.com/eidos-considering-tomb-raider-reboot-may-make-lara-more-female-friendly)
Made-up citation: "As a doctor, I'm often torn between giving flu shots and performing a complete Batman-Begins-ification on patients. Frankly, in terms of flu prevention, I don't think there's a difference."
Real citation: "I think Tomb Raider really needs a Batman-Begins-ification. Reset the story, show how Lara came to be and give us a story arch about her that is grounded a little more in reality with less magic, monsters and dinosaurs. The stuff that they started to do with Tomb Raider: Legend was good, but could be better. And put some damn clothes on!"
(Jan. 9, 2009, GameCyte, http://www.gamecyte.com/eidos-considering-tomb-raider-reboot-may-make-lara-more-female-friendly)
Made-up citation: "As a doctor, I'm often torn between giving flu shots and performing a complete Batman-Begins-ification on patients. Frankly, in terms of flu prevention, I don't think there's a difference."
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
emo-admiral
noun. A powerful military leader with hilarious emotional problems.
Real citation: "7)And finally, I really wish EJO would dial it down. His scenery chewing in Saul's quarters was both laughable and cringe-worthy. Way, way, way over the top. MM was getting there. I'm tired of Adama, the emo-admiral and Roslin, the misguided, self-loathing victim. People still need them to do their damn jobs--especially now."
(Jan. 18, 2009, "4-11: "Sometimes A Great Notion" 2009.01.16," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3181094&view=findpost&p=11257798)
Made-up citation: "At admiral school, all the kids used to call me an emo-admiral, just because the changing of the seasons is so beautiful, it makes me sob... And every grain of sand is so precious, it makes me weep... And every marmot is so pungent, it makes me sneeze..."
Real citation: "7)And finally, I really wish EJO would dial it down. His scenery chewing in Saul's quarters was both laughable and cringe-worthy. Way, way, way over the top. MM was getting there. I'm tired of Adama, the emo-admiral and Roslin, the misguided, self-loathing victim. People still need them to do their damn jobs--especially now."
(Jan. 18, 2009, "4-11: "Sometimes A Great Notion" 2009.01.16," Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3181094&view=findpost&p=11257798)
Made-up citation: "At admiral school, all the kids used to call me an emo-admiral, just because the changing of the seasons is so beautiful, it makes me sob... And every grain of sand is so precious, it makes me weep... And every marmot is so pungent, it makes me sneeze..."
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Dr. Pepper-ocracy
noun. And you thought today was an electoral sugar rush.
Real citation: "Chinese Dr. Pepper-ocracy
Check out Chuck Klosterman's review of Chinese Democracy. I can't believe Chinese Democracy actually came out. I honestly thought Axl Rose would die either at the hands of one of his many celebrity enemies (My dark horse pick? A tag team of David Keith and Keith David, working together like Dexter and Miguel Prado), or in some sort of cornrow-induced brain aneurysm. Axl's dying words would have been some combination of the words 'backing,' 'track,' 're-dub,' and 'fucker.'"
(Nov. 23, 2008, Polivision, http://polivision.blogspot.com/2008/11/chinese-dr-pepper-ocracy.html)
Made-up citation: "Political scientists predicting a Dr. Pepper-ocracy by 2020 have been relieved of their duties and urged to lay off the caffeine, for their own sake and that of their children."
Real citation: "Chinese Dr. Pepper-ocracy
Check out Chuck Klosterman's review of Chinese Democracy. I can't believe Chinese Democracy actually came out. I honestly thought Axl Rose would die either at the hands of one of his many celebrity enemies (My dark horse pick? A tag team of David Keith and Keith David, working together like Dexter and Miguel Prado), or in some sort of cornrow-induced brain aneurysm. Axl's dying words would have been some combination of the words 'backing,' 'track,' 're-dub,' and 'fucker.'"
(Nov. 23, 2008, Polivision, http://polivision.blogspot.com/2008/11/chinese-dr-pepper-ocracy.html)
Made-up citation: "Political scientists predicting a Dr. Pepper-ocracy by 2020 have been relieved of their duties and urged to lay off the caffeine, for their own sake and that of their children."
impending-doomy-sounding
adj. Duh-duh-DUH!
Real citation: "Battle Scars – The Chemical Brothers - who’d have thought the Chemical Brothers had another decent album in them? It’s their best one for ages, and I love this impending-doomy-sounding tune in particular, sung by Willy Mason."
(Dec. 17, 2007, http://www.last.fm/user/georgethe23rd/journal/2007/12/17/b63cp_my_top_14_tunes_of_07_and_why)
Made-up citation: "I hate to be all impending-doomy-sounding, but are you sure you remembered to throw those virgins in the volcano? Mount Hot Death looks angry."
Real citation: "Battle Scars – The Chemical Brothers - who’d have thought the Chemical Brothers had another decent album in them? It’s their best one for ages, and I love this impending-doomy-sounding tune in particular, sung by Willy Mason."
(Dec. 17, 2007, http://www.last.fm/user/georgethe23rd/journal/2007/12/17/b63cp_my_top_14_tunes_of_07_and_why)
Made-up citation: "I hate to be all impending-doomy-sounding, but are you sure you remembered to throw those virgins in the volcano? Mount Hot Death looks angry."
Monday, January 19, 2009
vegetable-travaganza
noun. One of the healthiest travaganzas imaginable.
Real citation: "Vegetable-travaganza!
Nothing like a fridge full of fresh vegetables to make one eat more of them! I joined a Community Supported Agriculture farm near my home for the summer and each week I get a share of the farm's current harvest. I did this not only to support a local small organic farm but to ensure that I would EAT MORE VEGETABLES. I admit I have a hard time getting those veggies in."
(May 28, 2008, Livejournal, http://community.livejournal.com/_weightwatchers/2008/05/28/)
Made-up citation: "I don't know what's a bigger vegetable-travaganza: the delicious salad I'm scarfing or the brain-dead bozos I'm scarfing it with. I need to find a new death cult..."
Real citation: "Vegetable-travaganza!
Nothing like a fridge full of fresh vegetables to make one eat more of them! I joined a Community Supported Agriculture farm near my home for the summer and each week I get a share of the farm's current harvest. I did this not only to support a local small organic farm but to ensure that I would EAT MORE VEGETABLES. I admit I have a hard time getting those veggies in."
(May 28, 2008, Livejournal, http://community.livejournal.com/_weightwatchers/2008/05/28/)
Made-up citation: "I don't know what's a bigger vegetable-travaganza: the delicious salad I'm scarfing or the brain-dead bozos I'm scarfing it with. I need to find a new death cult..."
catastrophic underwear failure
noun phrase. An affliction of the undernasties that is too terrible or titillating to behold.
Real citation: "An homage to, or rip-off of, Art Frahm’s pinups of the 1940’s, in this scene our fair maiden has experienced a catastrophic underwear failure. 'Whoops!' she declares, as her failure is made plain to see. Should have fixed that waist band a little tighter…"
(Sept. 1, 2005, Flickr, http://flickr.com/photos/dklo/39408496/)
Made-up citation: "I used to suffer from catastrophic underwear failure. Now I don no less than six pairs of underthings, underthongs, nethergarments, and underoos before getting up in the morning. I like to feel safe."
Real citation: "An homage to, or rip-off of, Art Frahm’s pinups of the 1940’s, in this scene our fair maiden has experienced a catastrophic underwear failure. 'Whoops!' she declares, as her failure is made plain to see. Should have fixed that waist band a little tighter…"
(Sept. 1, 2005, Flickr, http://flickr.com/photos/dklo/39408496/)
Made-up citation: "I used to suffer from catastrophic underwear failure. Now I don no less than six pairs of underthings, underthongs, nethergarments, and underoos before getting up in the morning. I like to feel safe."
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