Friday, April 28, 2006


noun. Look deep into the soul or pants of an assmunch, and this ye shall find.

Related terms: buttmunchitude.

Real citation: "I have to say I'm proud of 'Jack' this week for showing much less assmunchitude during his farewell speech to Meri-De."
(myriad, "Outback Jack," July 29, 2004, Television Without Pity,

Made-up citation: "Mike Judge discovered assmunchitude, much like Darwin discovered evolution. I have discovered that I need TP for my bunghole."


adj. Mentally wacky, with a pinch of bugfuck, a whiff of batshit, and a mound of postal.

Real citation: "Although Arcanum was love, VtM:B was released with a bug that pretty much keeled the game until the patch, and ToEE was a bugshitted mess that still hasn't been fixed (although some of the blame for that can be put on the publisher)."

Made-up citation: "When my puppy is in my lap, manically chomping on a toy frog, with a bugshitted gleam in his eye, I'm a happy puppy daddy."

Thursday, April 27, 2006


noun. Jackhole plus asshole plus headhole minus three holes.

Real citation: "we ended up scalping tix for face outside, so we went in. they sounded great, except we had this jackasshead yelling the lines to every song standing right next to us. and I mean yelling."
(swetsatonic, May 20, 2004,

Made-up citation: "I'd rather be a jackasshead than an asshead. That's just the way I was raised."

toe lickage

noun. Mmm...toe-tongue-bath-fest.

Real citation: "Total Toe Lickage! All Evilrip ever want is to have his toes licked, for reasons unbeknownst to the common net addict. you should probably just ask him yourself!"

Made-up citation: "Lipstick lesbians, lipstick librarians, and latte liberals love toe lickage, Lutherans lament."

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

lady balls

noun. The seat of testicular-fortitude-y power in the female frame of mind.

Real citation: "Folks, that takes balls--lady balls. We call 'em 'Thatchers.'"
(Stephen Colbert, April 24, 2006, The Colbert Report)

Made-up citation: "According to a recent poll, a lady with lady balls is preferable to a dude with man-boobs."


adj. Or maybe it's just a naked mole rat...

Real citation: "Jay Alan Sekulow of the Pat Robertson-affiliated American Center for Law and Justice -- what's that you say? A center for law and justice? And they're American? Whatever they say must be right -- says the center "decided to enter the case after concluding that acceptance of the gay rights arguments by the court might provide a constitutional foundation for same-sex marriage." The Family Research Council -- formerly headed by Gary Bauer, the most fetusesque presidential candidate since, well, Steve Forbes, who got into the 2000 race a couple of weeks before Bauer -- says that the Texas law represents "a reasonable means of promoting and protecting marriage -- the union of a man and a woman.""
(Joe Rospars, March 21, 2003, That Other Blog,

Made-up citation: "Casual Friday has been more successful than Pagan rituals like Fetusesque Friday."

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


noun. A crime of small, adorable proportions.

Related terms: dogslaughter, catslaughter, monkeyslaughter, ratslaughter, phoneslaughter.

Real citation: "LOL, if i did it was hamsterslaughter, im sure i wont be judged!"
(malibufighty, April 21, 2005,;read=5892)

Made-up citation: "If you're a snake, I'm pretty sure hamsterslaughter is legal (though not always carried out)."


adj. Non-whitey.

Real citation: "There’s a sushi joint in St. Bubba (the town where I work) that has become a favorite among my coworkers. Even Erin has been there; in the weird little downtown that comprises St. Bubba’s feistily non-corporate shopping drag (contrasted with its evil gentrified mall), there are number of funky (and sometimes even good) ethnic joints, including Burmese, more-than-adequate Mexican, and non-honkified Chinese."
(Dave, "Wait--This is Korean?", Jan. 4, 2006,

Made-up citation: "Lately, 'diverse' has been used as a synonym for 'black' or 'man, there's a lot of minorities here.' This non-diverse sense of 'diverse' also means 'non-honkified.'"

Tuesday, April 18, 2006


adj. Brain go boom!

Real citation: "I am now officially a SHO in Care of the Neurofucked, albeit a slightly ill one. Since my hallowed instituition is a tertiary centre, everybody is intensely clever. So clever, in fact, that if they hear hooves then they just know it's gotta be a zebra. Being so terribly clever, we only deal with the really big cases. To get through our doors, it's no good just being neurofucked - no, let the plebs in the other hospitals deal with that. Baby, if you wanna hang with the wunderkinder then you gotta get yourself neurodoublefucked, and preferably in a confusing way."
(Jan. 6, 2006, Confessions of a Venial Sinner,

Made-up citation: "As the Bible says, 'The neurodoublefucked shall inherit the earth.' And it didn't even take that long."


adj. Much like the God of thunder. Actually, more like the God badasses with ravens?

Real citation: "Giles seems more 'Odin-y,' which the whole detached-from-the-fray Watcher thing, and the research / book-learnin' stuff subbing for Odin's watchful nature (having two Raven spies, Hugin and Munin, and an 'all-seeing throne' at the top of the world in Hildskialf) and knowledge of the runes, which are the keys to all things in creation."
(Set, "Making Our Own Fun: Rewriting 'Buffy,'" Sept. 15, 2005, Television Without Pity,

Made-up citation: "My new rat terrier is quite adorable, though not very Odin-y."


noun. Pork-plooker. Bacon-boinker!

Real citation: "Or they're training the new Gertie to become Safe's "special friend" here on this newsgroup. Didn't our favorite pigfornicator lose his favorite target when the cult decided that Dennis Erlich was right all along about the Co$ being evil?"
(Chris Leithiser, June 10, 1999,

Made-up citation: "The way of the pigfornicator is a salty lifestyle indeed."

Friday, April 14, 2006


noun. That's sheer lunacy!

Related terms: batshit loony, batshit whacko, batshit insane, batshit nutty, batshit nutso, super-batshit-insane, completely-fucking-batshit-insane, batshit-fucking-crazy, batshit-sounding, non-batshit, pre-batshit, anti-batshit, batshit loonball, holy batshit, batshittery, batcrap, batpoop.

Real citation: "But Galvy wins by sure badassitude. Or is it batcrapitude..."
(Malancthon, Feb. 15, 2005,

Made-up citation: "By the end of Lost, if every character is chock full o' bugfuck batcrapitude, I'll be a very happy boy."


noun. Um, not that I would know anything about that. Nope. Not me. I love all religions, even the ones that believe in leprechauns and Xenu.

Real citation: "As for undisclosed anti-jeebusness, unless a product states that it contains nothing anti-jeebus, there's no reason to sue them. If I say that a movie contains no nudity, and it contains nudity, well, then I'm a lying dork."
(Nik, May 21, 2004,

Made-up citation: "Since Christ was a cowboy, anti-jeebusness has made many a Christian say, 'Sweet jumping Jesus!'"

Wednesday, April 12, 2006


noun. A precise, metaphorical-aneurysm-detecting device.

Real citation: "Luckily, I have prepared for this eventuality, and had my science friends whip me up a handy Aneurysmometer."
("Cranium...or Lawn Sprinkler?" August 30, 2004, You Are Dumb,

Made-up citation: "How much for the smoothie-maker/aneurysmometer?"


adj. Oh, the humanity!

Real citation: "G, please don't confuse them with the people in an anal probish meeting for Area 51, the real men in black wear Hawaiian shorts, sandals and have shirts that say something like: "OMFG! I pwnz a 4d10 hammer!"."
(Amakusha, June 13, 2005,

Made-up citation: "Learn more about minimally anal-probish surgery and get a free bagel tonight!"

Tuesday, April 11, 2006


noun. Like pornography, hard to define and easy to spot.

Related terms: wackassitude.

Real citation: "Cyrus: 'Oh, good. I am not alone in the wack-assage.'"

Made-up citation: "Warning: consumption of alcohol during pregnancy may result in wack-assage and crack-babyage."


adverb. Loinly

Real citation: "My next big injury didn't happen until 5 years later. Since no names are being mentioned, I could be quite candid about it. It was an inexperienced tea-bagging incident. Meant to be an awesome night, but ended up in a ball of awkwardness and groinly displeasure."
(Aug. 9, 2005,

Made-up citation: "'Groinly' is not a perfect substitute for 'crotchly,' as many Robert Frost poems unfortunately demonstrate."

Monday, April 10, 2006


noun. A fighting word, sure to impugn a nicknamee's character, face, and bippy.

Real citation: "I was seriously concerned when you mentioned you had a lump on your cock, although as Mildo mentioned that cancerous lumps typically grow on the nutsack. I'm glad it's not a serious lump, but thanks for the scare, jerkbuttface."
(Walid Khouretsoli, Sept. 8, 2005,

Made-up citation: "As Billy Corgan wrote, 'The jerkbuttface in you is the jerkbuttface in me.'"


adverb. For fans of Battlestar Galactica, an affirmative word.

Related terms: absodiddly, absoforking, absofreaking, absofricking, absofucking.

Real citation: "I absofracking love Gentoo..and linux as a whole. I just don't know what to do with the system."
(crab, June 27, 2004,

Made-up citation: "Without the Seinfeld terms 'low talker,' 'high talker,' and 'close talker,' I absofracking don't know how I'd make fun of others' yakking deficiencies."

Friday, April 07, 2006

extraordinary equestrian

noun. A horsefucker.

Real citation: "Brushing them, caressing them, feeding them, riding them—these people are always with horses, and horses are always with them. So what truly differentiates an average equestrian from an extraordinary equestrian? One way or the other, both derive pleasure from horses."
(Charles Munde, "The Animal in You," Feb. 23, 2006, The Stranger,

Made-up citation: "Being an extraordinary equestrian comes with extraordinary responsibilities. Whoops, he died, never mind."


noun. A very dudely quality.

Real citation: "Hee hee. I've had it for a while now. XD I'm all sneaky with the stalkerifficness, ne?"
(Chanie, Nov. 3, 2005,

Made-up citation: "Stalkerifficness is next to Godliness--if your God is a fucking psycho."

Thursday, April 06, 2006


noun. Look deep into the soul of Satan, a Satanic cult, or a plate of Satanically hot chicken wings, and this ye shall find.

Real citation: "No other takers, eh? Well, you were close, sort of. No satanosity is involved, however. The obscure reference of the week is to the revised year of X-day, which for the uninformed in all things Yeti is the day the pleasure saucers come to take away those who have sufficient slack and have sent in their $30."
(May 30, 2002,

Made-up citation: "Neither my labradoodle Betty nor my cockerpoo Veronica has much satanosity."


adj. Possessing a veritable kerblooey of sexy, sexual, sexalicious qualities.

Real citation: "Ev, meanwhile, was played by Leslie Parrish. Ms. Parrish played a number of sexbombish roles in the ‘50s through the ‘70s. Her most famous role was as the fiancĂ©e of the Laurence Harvey character in the paranoid classic The Manchurian Candidate. Following this film she acted in two more crappy B-movies before retiring from the screen."
(Kem Begg, "Video Cheese,"

Made-up citation: "Like the jackass penguin, the sexbombish aardvark is misnamed."

Wednesday, April 05, 2006


adj. With lots o' explosions and extra butter.

Real citation: "Good to see so many Wire fans. I love both shows. The Shield is a little popcorn-action-flick-y next to The Wire, but at the same time it is so much better than just about every thing else on tv."
(orion choachly, "The Shield," Feb. 11, 2006, Television Without Pity,

Made-up citation: "My life is neither popcorn-action-flick-y nor amateur-porny. It is somewhat minty."


noun. Usually, a metaphorical wankfest.

Related terms: days-offitude, lay-offitude, pissed-offitude, peel-offitude, rip-offitude, show-offitude.

Real citation: "Exhausting jerkoffitude? Lots."
(Steely Rob, "EPIC GLOBAL ORGIES," March 30, 2004,

Made-up citation: "I thought I understood jerkoffitude well...then I went to grad school."