adj. Call the doctor, priest, exorcist, etc.
Real citation: "From there we'd realise the Giles in the real world isn't actually the First, but a force of good, PTB?, that's using (a non-corporeal)Giles, his memories, etc, to help them - but he'll go when the First is defeated. Buffy has issues about this, later on of course she can't hug Giles to say good bye when he has to go - all sad, etc. The series ends on a similar tone it actually does, 'cause Giles is at peace and they know it (with Anya & Spike still dyingish)"
(Jamie, April 26, 2004, "Making Our Own Fun: Rewriting 'Buffy,'" Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=2806070&view=findpost&p=1326741)
Made-up citation: "Maybe I'm not in a dyingish state exactly, but this fucking cough is screwing up my sleep and KILLING ME."
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Monday, June 19, 2006
globo-downfallization
noun. World go boom. Or down the commode. Or something.
Real citation: "Like Geoff Pullum, I haven't read what Don Watson has to say about the globo-downfallization of language, because Watson's book is not available here."
(Mark Liberman, "Counting new words: is there a lexicography gap?," Dec. 23, 2003, Language Log, http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000257.html)
Made-up citation: "Disappointing though it may be, I don't believe your expanding waistline can be linked to globo-downfallization."
Real citation: "Like Geoff Pullum, I haven't read what Don Watson has to say about the globo-downfallization of language, because Watson's book is not available here."
(Mark Liberman, "Counting new words: is there a lexicography gap?," Dec. 23, 2003, Language Log, http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000257.html)
Made-up citation: "Disappointing though it may be, I don't believe your expanding waistline can be linked to globo-downfallization."
turnedonedness
noun. Fire in the pants! I think it moved.
Real citation: "Perhaps I was reading it wrong. Perhaps I wasn't supposed to read it as a story, but read one chapter at a time, as turnedonedness was required. Bullshit."
(Tessa, April 27, 2005, Silence Without, http://silence-without.blogspot.com/2005/04/sleeping-beauty-novels-anne-rice-i.html)
Made-up citation: "Yesterday, turnedonedness was in the air, as I had to drag my frothing-at-the-groin puppy away from an unspayed beagle, thus preventing the worst Father's Day ever."
Real citation: "Perhaps I was reading it wrong. Perhaps I wasn't supposed to read it as a story, but read one chapter at a time, as turnedonedness was required. Bullshit."
(Tessa, April 27, 2005, Silence Without, http://silence-without.blogspot.com/2005/04/sleeping-beauty-novels-anne-rice-i.html)
Made-up citation: "Yesterday, turnedonedness was in the air, as I had to drag my frothing-at-the-groin puppy away from an unspayed beagle, thus preventing the worst Father's Day ever."
Friday, June 09, 2006
go psycho bugnuts
idiom. Go cuckoo bananas; go slappy walnuts; go mentally wacky; go overnight postal; sprinkle crack on one's cornflakes.
Real citation: "Why leave it up to a couple of people, with no support? Especially people who are likely to go psycho bugnuts as they all apparently do?"
(Daniel, "Live Together, Die Alone," page 16, Television Without Pity, http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=136&story=9402&page=16&sort=&limit=)
Made-up citation: "Since getting a puppy, litterbugs drive me six shades of psycho bugnuts--because he eats everything and then licks me. Essentially, your trash is licking me. Why don't you just smear it directly on my face?"
Real citation: "Why leave it up to a couple of people, with no support? Especially people who are likely to go psycho bugnuts as they all apparently do?"
(Daniel, "Live Together, Die Alone," page 16, Television Without Pity, http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=136&story=9402&page=16&sort=&limit=)
Made-up citation: "Since getting a puppy, litterbugs drive me six shades of psycho bugnuts--because he eats everything and then licks me. Essentially, your trash is licking me. Why don't you just smear it directly on my face?"
spokesfuckhead
noun. A citizen with public speaking responsibilities in addition to fuckheaded backwards behavior.
Related terms: spokesbaby, spokesbat, spokeschimp, spokescrab, spokescrony, spokesdemon, spokesdipshit, spokesdoofus, spokesdude, spokes-fembot, spokesferret, spokeshottie, spokeslackey, spokesloony, spokeslunatic, spokesmaniac, spokesmartian, spokesmonkey, spokesmoron, spokesnomad, spokespuppet, spokespuppy, spokesvermin, spokesweasel, spokeswookie.
Real citation: “Roger Scheissman, official spokesfuckhead for alt.flame."
(Anonymous, Sept. 28, 2001, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.flame/msg/68baa7c6253936b7?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Hiring a man named Snow as White House press secretary was a brave step towards honesty; another step was taken yesterday when the position was renamed Spokesfuckhead-in-Chief."
Related terms: spokesbaby, spokesbat, spokeschimp, spokescrab, spokescrony, spokesdemon, spokesdipshit, spokesdoofus, spokesdude, spokes-fembot, spokesferret, spokeshottie, spokeslackey, spokesloony, spokeslunatic, spokesmaniac, spokesmartian, spokesmonkey, spokesmoron, spokesnomad, spokespuppet, spokespuppy, spokesvermin, spokesweasel, spokeswookie.
Real citation: “Roger Scheissman, official spokesfuckhead for alt.flame."
(Anonymous, Sept. 28, 2001, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.flame/msg/68baa7c6253936b7?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Hiring a man named Snow as White House press secretary was a brave step towards honesty; another step was taken yesterday when the position was renamed Spokesfuckhead-in-Chief."
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
bewiggery
noun. Heaps of hair! Take care! Beware!
Real citation: "But this production, currently filming in County Clare, is not the flouncing posh-frocked bewiggery we've come to expect."
("Serpent's Kiss Article Text (From Last Month)," Dec. 8, 2000, The REG Temple, http://www.richard-e-grant.com/News/Archives/archive-122000.html)
Made-up citation: "Now that Alias is finished, I'll miss Victor Garber and Ron Rifkin the most, but Jennifer Garner's bewiggery and other charms will always have a special place in my pants."
Real citation: "But this production, currently filming in County Clare, is not the flouncing posh-frocked bewiggery we've come to expect."
("Serpent's Kiss Article Text (From Last Month)," Dec. 8, 2000, The REG Temple, http://www.richard-e-grant.com/News/Archives/archive-122000.html)
Made-up citation: "Now that Alias is finished, I'll miss Victor Garber and Ron Rifkin the most, but Jennifer Garner's bewiggery and other charms will always have a special place in my pants."
group-grope-y
adj. Orgylicious.
Real citation: "But overall, these are a little too group-grope-y for me. I admit it, I'm a control freak... I like being able to select the recipients of my award-winning kisses, rather than have Fate (or a buncha drunk Lhoppers) do it for me."
(Atalanta, Aug. 14, 2001, http://www.yehoodi.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=166462&highlight=&sid=d098e39fd1a3d4ed0f0f4f05b12870c2)
Made-up citation: "I've only had one nearly group-grope-y sitch in my life. Amazingly, a vat of alcohol was involved."
Real citation: "But overall, these are a little too group-grope-y for me. I admit it, I'm a control freak... I like being able to select the recipients of my award-winning kisses, rather than have Fate (or a buncha drunk Lhoppers) do it for me."
(Atalanta, Aug. 14, 2001, http://www.yehoodi.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=166462&highlight=&sid=d098e39fd1a3d4ed0f0f4f05b12870c2)
Made-up citation: "I've only had one nearly group-grope-y sitch in my life. Amazingly, a vat of alcohol was involved."
Monday, June 05, 2006
nookie-mashing
noun. Not sure I can explain this one, but me likey the sound of it.
Real citation: "The L Word (Showtime) better bring back Dana Delany and fast. Playing a Senator on last night's episode, she was sharp, focused, and contained, packing more pow than all those younger actresses flopping their bodies and attitudes around. Her attempted seduction of Jennifer Beals' Bette was sexier and more insinuating than all the panting, heaving, instant-undress nookie-mashing they've been doing lately."
(James Wolcott, "The Pause that Refreshes," Jan. 30, 2006, http://jameswolcott.com/archives/2006/01/the_pause_that.php)
Made-up citation: "Since getting a puppy, I have had less energy to pursue nookie-mashing activities, though the puppy is El Chick Magneto. It's a paradox."
Real citation: "The L Word (Showtime) better bring back Dana Delany and fast. Playing a Senator on last night's episode, she was sharp, focused, and contained, packing more pow than all those younger actresses flopping their bodies and attitudes around. Her attempted seduction of Jennifer Beals' Bette was sexier and more insinuating than all the panting, heaving, instant-undress nookie-mashing they've been doing lately."
(James Wolcott, "The Pause that Refreshes," Jan. 30, 2006, http://jameswolcott.com/archives/2006/01/the_pause_that.php)
Made-up citation: "Since getting a puppy, I have had less energy to pursue nookie-mashing activities, though the puppy is El Chick Magneto. It's a paradox."
vagilina
noun. Brangelina's aptly named cha-cha, where the hoo-hoo-dilly of Mr. Pitt enjoys membership privileges.
Related terms: infangelina.
Real citation: "The naughty tongues of Hollyweird are in full 'wag' mode over recent reports that a Pitt/Jolie wedding is right around the corner, to be quickly followed by a baby hopping out of Angelina's 'vagilina.'"
(Ann Romano, "One Day at a Time," Jan. 12, The Portland Mercury, portlandmercury.com/portland/Content?category=22175&issue=35913)
Made-up citation: "If you gaze into the vagilina too long, your subscription to People will run out."
Related terms: infangelina.
Real citation: "The naughty tongues of Hollyweird are in full 'wag' mode over recent reports that a Pitt/Jolie wedding is right around the corner, to be quickly followed by a baby hopping out of Angelina's 'vagilina.'"
(Ann Romano, "One Day at a Time," Jan. 12, The Portland Mercury, portlandmercury.com/portland/Content?category=22175&issue=35913)
Made-up citation: "If you gaze into the vagilina too long, your subscription to People will run out."
Friday, June 02, 2006
pillow-fighting-esque
adj. Mmm...male fantasy overload.
Real citation: "Well, I feel better then, that I didn't miss out on any Nadia/Rachel hair-braiding, pillow-fighting-esque slumber party behavior since Rachel had moved out. You think they could have thought to tell us, oh I don't know, before tonight?"
(kariyaki, "5-16/5-17: "Reprisal"/"All the Time in the World" 2006.05.22," May 22, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3141076&view=findpost&p=5321657)
Made-up citation: "Ultimate fighting is increasing in popularity and rarely described as 'pillow-fighting-esque.'"
Real citation: "Well, I feel better then, that I didn't miss out on any Nadia/Rachel hair-braiding, pillow-fighting-esque slumber party behavior since Rachel had moved out. You think they could have thought to tell us, oh I don't know, before tonight?"
(kariyaki, "5-16/5-17: "Reprisal"/"All the Time in the World" 2006.05.22," May 22, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3141076&view=findpost&p=5321657)
Made-up citation: "Ultimate fighting is increasing in popularity and rarely described as 'pillow-fighting-esque.'"
tentaclicious
adj. Deliciously tentacled, much like a few of my relatives.
Real citation: "The new Octopons from the 50 Fathoms line would work well. They are nicely sculpted and tentaclicious!"
(Aaron T, Feb. 20, 2004, http://theminiaturespage.com/boards/msg.mv?id=15158)
Made-up citation: "If pigmen and other animal-human hybrids eventually rule the earth, I only hope, for the sake of the children, that our unholy, porky overlords will be tentaclicious."
Real citation: "The new Octopons from the 50 Fathoms line would work well. They are nicely sculpted and tentaclicious!"
(Aaron T, Feb. 20, 2004, http://theminiaturespage.com/boards/msg.mv?id=15158)
Made-up citation: "If pigmen and other animal-human hybrids eventually rule the earth, I only hope, for the sake of the children, that our unholy, porky overlords will be tentaclicious."
bro-itude
noun. That's dude-itude--for men.
Real citation: "Next time on Exe-Jesus: Abram gets an "ah" and God tells him to cut off part of his dick as a sign of eternal bro-itude!"
(darksandal, Feb. 6, 2006, http://toiletpaperonline.typepad.com/the_blog/2006/02/
exejesus_genesi.html)
Made-up citation: "'Bros before hos' is a central tenet of French philosophy--uh, make that bro-itude."
Real citation: "Next time on Exe-Jesus: Abram gets an "ah" and God tells him to cut off part of his dick as a sign of eternal bro-itude!"
(darksandal, Feb. 6, 2006, http://toiletpaperonline.typepad.com/the_blog/2006/02/
exejesus_genesi.html)
Made-up citation: "'Bros before hos' is a central tenet of French philosophy--uh, make that bro-itude."
Monday, May 29, 2006
peckerwoodedness
noun. Look deep into the eyes of a peckerwooded, prickish penishead, and this ye shall find.
Real citation: "So legend/fact has it that Shuggie Otis was wanted for the Rolling Stones at one time or another. Listen to "Sweet Thing," and it's so clear why -- his guitar tone stiffens with the sort of brutal honesty/talent that Keith Richards hocked/'hoed over his lifetime to varying degrees, during varying degrees of peckerwoodedness."
(JW, "YR SKIVS IN A WAD," Sept. 1, 2001, Pop Cesspool, http://popcesspool.blogspot.com/archives/
2001_09_01_popcesspool_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Judge a man not by the size of his peckerwoodedness. Just lop off his weenie."
Real citation: "So legend/fact has it that Shuggie Otis was wanted for the Rolling Stones at one time or another. Listen to "Sweet Thing," and it's so clear why -- his guitar tone stiffens with the sort of brutal honesty/talent that Keith Richards hocked/'hoed over his lifetime to varying degrees, during varying degrees of peckerwoodedness."
(JW, "YR SKIVS IN A WAD," Sept. 1, 2001, Pop Cesspool, http://popcesspool.blogspot.com/archives/
2001_09_01_popcesspool_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Judge a man not by the size of his peckerwoodedness. Just lop off his weenie."
Schiavotastic
adj. Brain dead? Though the hills may be alive with the sounds of cuckoo-bananas nuttery. Or maybe this word just refers to the frenzy surrounding Terry Schiavo.
Real citation: "Schiavotastic"
(John, "Schiavotastic," March 21, 2005, Dymaxion World, http://dymaxionworld.blogspot.com/2005/03/schiavotastic.html)
Made-up citation: "If the soup is Schiavotastic, I'll skip the soup."
Real citation: "Schiavotastic"
(John, "Schiavotastic," March 21, 2005, Dymaxion World, http://dymaxionworld.blogspot.com/2005/03/schiavotastic.html)
Made-up citation: "If the soup is Schiavotastic, I'll skip the soup."
Friday, May 26, 2006
motherfuckerload
noun. Sweet mother of fucker--that's a lot.
Related terms: motherfuckload.
Real citation: "Despite the fact that the Sex Pistols are conspicuous in their absence, this 4-CD motherfuckerload of pre-hardcore punk is downright spastic with both obvious and tarnished gems."
(Marc Savlov, Dec. 12, 2003, http://www.austinchronicle.com/issues/dispatch/2003-12-12/music_string_all.html)
Made-up citation: "On a scale of zero to a motherfuckerload, how would you rate the aesthetic appeal of your toes?"
Related terms: motherfuckload.
Real citation: "Despite the fact that the Sex Pistols are conspicuous in their absence, this 4-CD motherfuckerload of pre-hardcore punk is downright spastic with both obvious and tarnished gems."
(Marc Savlov, Dec. 12, 2003, http://www.austinchronicle.com/issues/dispatch/2003-12-12/music_string_all.html)
Made-up citation: "On a scale of zero to a motherfuckerload, how would you rate the aesthetic appeal of your toes?"
non-thongish
adj. Tasteful, genteel, and not in any way wedged in an ass.
Real citation: "Trish pulls Molly's pants down to reveal very non-thongish 'granny panties'!"
(Adam Kohen, July 4, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.pro-wrestling.wwf/msg/81a99def8bb67443?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Even in non-thongish attire, I am quite fetching, according to nine out of ten dentists."
Real citation: "Trish pulls Molly's pants down to reveal very non-thongish 'granny panties'!"
(Adam Kohen, July 4, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.pro-wrestling.wwf/msg/81a99def8bb67443?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Even in non-thongish attire, I am quite fetching, according to nine out of ten dentists."
pseudo-facty
adj. Truthy?
Real citation: "Secret societies that revere Mary Magdalene, Renaissance artists who doodle blasphemous in-jokes in the corners of their paintings, tubby cardinals desperate to make sure the general public doesn't find out that women really are the center of the universe: "The Da Vinci Code," a blend of pseudo-facty information and mischievous, provocative invention, is a flying meringue pie headed straight for the church's kisser."
(Stephanie Zacharek, "The Da Vinci Code," May 18, 2006, http://www.salon.com/ent/movies/review/2006/05/18/da_vinci/)
Made-up citation: "My knowledge of history is pseudo-facty at best. Hamlet was a Moop, right?"
Real citation: "Secret societies that revere Mary Magdalene, Renaissance artists who doodle blasphemous in-jokes in the corners of their paintings, tubby cardinals desperate to make sure the general public doesn't find out that women really are the center of the universe: "The Da Vinci Code," a blend of pseudo-facty information and mischievous, provocative invention, is a flying meringue pie headed straight for the church's kisser."
(Stephanie Zacharek, "The Da Vinci Code," May 18, 2006, http://www.salon.com/ent/movies/review/2006/05/18/da_vinci/)
Made-up citation: "My knowledge of history is pseudo-facty at best. Hamlet was a Moop, right?"
Friday, May 19, 2006
crap-diddly-yappy
adj. A flavor of crappy that would make Ned Flanders proud as a diddly doodly something or other.
Related terms: crap-diddly-yap, crap-diddly-ap, crap-diddly-dap, crap-diddly-crap-crap, crap-diddly-doo, crap-diddly-tastic.
Real citation: "I was in the shade when I took the pictures which is why they look so crap-diddly-yappy. I lightened them the best I could, but you get the gist of her glee."
(July 17, 2005, The Kidlet Chronicles, http://kidlet.typepad.com/the_kidlet_chronicles/2005/07/
what_a_weekend.html)
Made-up citation: "God doesn't make crap, but he does make a shitload of crap-diddly-yappy turd-like stuff."
Related terms: crap-diddly-yap, crap-diddly-ap, crap-diddly-dap, crap-diddly-crap-crap, crap-diddly-doo, crap-diddly-tastic.
Real citation: "I was in the shade when I took the pictures which is why they look so crap-diddly-yappy. I lightened them the best I could, but you get the gist of her glee."
(July 17, 2005, The Kidlet Chronicles, http://kidlet.typepad.com/the_kidlet_chronicles/2005/07/
what_a_weekend.html)
Made-up citation: "God doesn't make crap, but he does make a shitload of crap-diddly-yappy turd-like stuff."
social-issuey
adj. Serious business, my friends.
Real citation: "They aren't meant to be like Bollywood; they are American and British movies made by Indian immigrants or sons/daughters of immigrants. They are usually more social-issuey, less melodramatic, and more about the immigrant experience, which I can relate to a lot even as a non-desi. (The one exception is Bollywood/Hollywood, which totally is trying to mix Bollywood with Hollywood.)"
(jfung79, "Desi movies," Jan. 1, 2004, http://www.chatarea.com/BollyWHAT.m1802802-1)
Made-up citation: "It just doesn't seem right to describe Gandhi as a svelte, social-issuey studmeister."
Real citation: "They aren't meant to be like Bollywood; they are American and British movies made by Indian immigrants or sons/daughters of immigrants. They are usually more social-issuey, less melodramatic, and more about the immigrant experience, which I can relate to a lot even as a non-desi. (The one exception is Bollywood/Hollywood, which totally is trying to mix Bollywood with Hollywood.)"
(jfung79, "Desi movies," Jan. 1, 2004, http://www.chatarea.com/BollyWHAT.m1802802-1)
Made-up citation: "It just doesn't seem right to describe Gandhi as a svelte, social-issuey studmeister."
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
coconut-testicled
adj. Endowed with primitive, prodigious, Pope-worthy ballitude.
Real citation: "And a coconut-testicled, 15-foot tall Locke throwing knives at a sentient cloud of black smoke? Oh, I'd keep watching, but I think I'd feel really dirty afterwards."
(Super, May 7, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3119603&view=findpost&p=5186968)
Made-up citation: "According to the OED, 'coconut-testicled' can first be found in a letter of Jane Austen's, though the related 'melon-balled' is much older."
Real citation: "And a coconut-testicled, 15-foot tall Locke throwing knives at a sentient cloud of black smoke? Oh, I'd keep watching, but I think I'd feel really dirty afterwards."
(Super, May 7, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3119603&view=findpost&p=5186968)
Made-up citation: "According to the OED, 'coconut-testicled' can first be found in a letter of Jane Austen's, though the related 'melon-balled' is much older."
spokeslunatic
noun. A batshit loonball with postal tendencies and public relations responsibilities.
Related terms: spokesbaby, spokesbat, spokeschimp, spokescrab, spokescrony, spokesdemon, spokesdipshit, spokesdoofus, spokesdude, spokes-fembot, spokesferret, spokeshottie, spokeslackey, spokesloony, spokesmaniac, spokesmartian, spokesmonkey, spokesmoron, spokesnomad, spokespuppet, spokespuppy, spokesvermin, spokesweasel, spokeswookie.
Real citation: "And who better to help her through this awkward phase than Canadian madman-turned-MTV spokeslunatic, Tom Green, her husband as of April."
(Cynthia Amsden, Oct. 18, 2001, http://www.seemagazine.com/Issues/2001/1018/screen1.htm)
Made-up citation: "If a spokeslunatic only drooled and barked, would he lose his job or get a promotion?"
Related terms: spokesbaby, spokesbat, spokeschimp, spokescrab, spokescrony, spokesdemon, spokesdipshit, spokesdoofus, spokesdude, spokes-fembot, spokesferret, spokeshottie, spokeslackey, spokesloony, spokesmaniac, spokesmartian, spokesmonkey, spokesmoron, spokesnomad, spokespuppet, spokespuppy, spokesvermin, spokesweasel, spokeswookie.
Real citation: "And who better to help her through this awkward phase than Canadian madman-turned-MTV spokeslunatic, Tom Green, her husband as of April."
(Cynthia Amsden, Oct. 18, 2001, http://www.seemagazine.com/Issues/2001/1018/screen1.htm)
Made-up citation: "If a spokeslunatic only drooled and barked, would he lose his job or get a promotion?"
Monday, May 15, 2006
meh-itude
noun. A state of apathy where residents would remove their eyeballs with sporks, if they weren't so stupefied.
Real citation: "Back again and no longer feeling the effects. Woke up early for the geology lab which was absurdly easy again, this was promptly followed by the geology lecture of meh-itude."
(Jan. 23, 2004, http://students.washington.edu/tkt84/blog_jan_23_2004.htm)
Made-up citation: "I finally started watching 24, but the first two episodes filled me with meh-itude. Every single character was boring, and the stereotypical teenage characters made me lose the will to live. Plus, the Palmer guy makes me think of car insurance, car insurance, car insurance, and taking a nap."
Real citation: "Back again and no longer feeling the effects. Woke up early for the geology lab which was absurdly easy again, this was promptly followed by the geology lecture of meh-itude."
(Jan. 23, 2004, http://students.washington.edu/tkt84/blog_jan_23_2004.htm)
Made-up citation: "I finally started watching 24, but the first two episodes filled me with meh-itude. Every single character was boring, and the stereotypical teenage characters made me lose the will to live. Plus, the Palmer guy makes me think of car insurance, car insurance, car insurance, and taking a nap."
ass-pullage
noun. A metaphorical parlor trick involving a proctological wonder.
Related terms: asspull, ass-pullery.
Real citation: "Decipher's Starships handbook, perhaps? IIRC, the T'Kumbra was reused footage of the Prometheus from "Second Sight" (also reused as the Lexington from "Explorers") and the rest of those numbers were never seen onscreen, either. I smell me some ass-pullage!"
(MMoM, June 19, 2005, http://flare.solareclipse.net/cgi2/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=print_topic;f=6;t=002568)
Made-up citation: "As a writing teacher, I instruct students in the fine arts of rhetoric, ass-pullage, and spelling.”
Related terms: asspull, ass-pullery.
Real citation: "Decipher's Starships handbook, perhaps? IIRC, the T'Kumbra was reused footage of the Prometheus from "Second Sight" (also reused as the Lexington from "Explorers") and the rest of those numbers were never seen onscreen, either. I smell me some ass-pullage!"
(MMoM, June 19, 2005, http://flare.solareclipse.net/cgi2/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=print_topic;f=6;t=002568)
Made-up citation: "As a writing teacher, I instruct students in the fine arts of rhetoric, ass-pullage, and spelling.”
Friday, May 12, 2006
not-dead-ness
noun. It's alive! Aaaiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Real citation: "CRAP (see this post for the CRAP 411): And by 'Barney', I mean either the dinosaur or the 'Miller'; neither one raises my tent in the slightest... though Abe Vigoda is impressive in maintaining his not-dead-ness for so long."
(Charlie, June 26, 2003, http://www.wherethehellwasi.com/categories/potty-talk-yes-im-a-pig/mans_new_best_friend.html)
Made-up citation: "Just as wellness centers replaced health centers, soon not-dead-ness facilities will be mega-mega-hip."
Real citation: "CRAP (see this post for the CRAP 411): And by 'Barney', I mean either the dinosaur or the 'Miller'; neither one raises my tent in the slightest... though Abe Vigoda is impressive in maintaining his not-dead-ness for so long."
(Charlie, June 26, 2003, http://www.wherethehellwasi.com/categories/potty-talk-yes-im-a-pig/mans_new_best_friend.html)
Made-up citation: "Just as wellness centers replaced health centers, soon not-dead-ness facilities will be mega-mega-hip."
fuckingtacular
adj. Pretty much, specfuckingtacular.
Related words: fuckingtastic.
Real citation: "We then went to Allans Music store. They had so many fuckingtacular guitars & drum kits *drools…"
(clot_blood, Jan. 24, 2006, http://clot-blood.livejournal.com/1356.html)
Made-up citation: "On a scale of fuckingtacular to zilch, how would you rate your hair product?"
Related words: fuckingtastic.
Real citation: "We then went to Allans Music store. They had so many fuckingtacular guitars & drum kits *drools…"
(clot_blood, Jan. 24, 2006, http://clot-blood.livejournal.com/1356.html)
Made-up citation: "On a scale of fuckingtacular to zilch, how would you rate your hair product?"
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
poopfacebutt
noun. A childish insult or anatomical curiosity.
Real citation: "hey sombrero, how are you doing? I'm gonna try to make this a good comment ok? hmmm.....yea so thats about all I can think of to say :( man I'm pathetic but at least you love me!!!! ok well umm poopfacebutt, pwned"
(Brian, April 2, 2006, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=4231810)
Made-up citation: "I'm proud to be a poopfacebutt, yet ashamed to be an asswipehead. Identity is complex and problematic."
Real citation: "hey sombrero, how are you doing? I'm gonna try to make this a good comment ok? hmmm.....yea so thats about all I can think of to say :( man I'm pathetic but at least you love me!!!! ok well umm poopfacebutt, pwned"
(Brian, April 2, 2006, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=4231810)
Made-up citation: "I'm proud to be a poopfacebutt, yet ashamed to be an asswipehead. Identity is complex and problematic."
dentistette
noun. A medical professional with feminine wiles and horrifying drills.
Related terms: dentistess.
Real citation: "Allllllrighty then...today, at 109:45 this morning...i was sitting in a dentist chair getting 2 cavities filled!!!! OH my mouth hurts soooooo much right now...and why??? OK...my mouth is sooooo gay...The dentist lady (dentistette??) gave me novacaine and after a while tested the spot to see how numb it was...well...it wasnt!!!"
(Janah, July 29, 2005, http://www.xanga.com/worsHIP_HOP4eva?nextdate=9%2F13%2F2005+22%3A44%3A30.403&direction=n)
Made-up citation: "My daughter the dentistette will dominate your ex-wife the exorcist."
Related terms: dentistess.
Real citation: "Allllllrighty then...today, at 109:45 this morning...i was sitting in a dentist chair getting 2 cavities filled!!!! OH my mouth hurts soooooo much right now...and why??? OK...my mouth is sooooo gay...The dentist lady (dentistette??) gave me novacaine and after a while tested the spot to see how numb it was...well...it wasnt!!!"
(Janah, July 29, 2005, http://www.xanga.com/worsHIP_HOP4eva?nextdate=9%2F13%2F2005+22%3A44%3A30.403&direction=n)
Made-up citation: "My daughter the dentistette will dominate your ex-wife the exorcist."
Monday, May 08, 2006
girly-bits-related
adj. Groinocological.
Real citation: "In other girly-bits-related news, my left ovary (... I just typed 'uterus'. Yes, my left uterus. I am a Martian, you see. We have six. Back/front/top/bottom/left/right.) Anyway. My left ovary, it hates me. Quite a lot. And so does ol' Utey. CURSE YOU UTEY. But the latter hasn't been playing up too much, just its little accomplice. CURSE YOU."
("Chomp.," May 8, 2005, http://hereisadiary.diaryland.com/050508_34.html)
Made-up citation: "A girly-girl and a girly-man were discussing girly-bits-related stuff, until Wonder Woman dropped them like a bag of dirt."
Real citation: "In other girly-bits-related news, my left ovary (... I just typed 'uterus'. Yes, my left uterus. I am a Martian, you see. We have six. Back/front/top/bottom/left/right.) Anyway. My left ovary, it hates me. Quite a lot. And so does ol' Utey. CURSE YOU UTEY. But the latter hasn't been playing up too much, just its little accomplice. CURSE YOU."
("Chomp.," May 8, 2005, http://hereisadiary.diaryland.com/050508_34.html)
Made-up citation: "A girly-girl and a girly-man were discussing girly-bits-related stuff, until Wonder Woman dropped them like a bag of dirt."
unbiggify
verb. To teeny-weeny-ize.
Real citation: "Vivien, I like them all. Aren't you kind. When Rosie is being a scaredy cat, you tell her it's okay. When Mikey's being a scaredy cat, I call him a chickenshit and tell him to "unbiggify" his tail."
(Roberta, Feb. 3, 2004, http://www.able2know.com/forums/about3090-0-asc-220.html)
Made-up citation: "Hello Aries. According to the cosmic portents, nothing unbiggifies a boner like your face."
Real citation: "Vivien, I like them all. Aren't you kind. When Rosie is being a scaredy cat, you tell her it's okay. When Mikey's being a scaredy cat, I call him a chickenshit and tell him to "unbiggify" his tail."
(Roberta, Feb. 3, 2004, http://www.able2know.com/forums/about3090-0-asc-220.html)
Made-up citation: "Hello Aries. According to the cosmic portents, nothing unbiggifies a boner like your face."
Friday, May 05, 2006
mini-Rasta-y
adj. Like a teeny-weeny Bob Marley.
Real citation: "And now for a brief word on Dixon's hair. I think it's fab. It's longer and kind of mini-Rasta-y, but it's great. It's totally not very CIA-ish, mind you, but it makes Dixon look cool, so I'm all for it. A lot of people on the boards were like, stinky! Stinky poo! But I like it. So shut up."
(Erin Dailey, "Maternal Instinct," page 1, Television Without Pity, http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=75&story=9188)
Made-up citation: "With my thick, mangy locks, I could go mini-Rasta-y, mega-Rasta-y, or holy-god-check-out-that-hair."
Real citation: "And now for a brief word on Dixon's hair. I think it's fab. It's longer and kind of mini-Rasta-y, but it's great. It's totally not very CIA-ish, mind you, but it makes Dixon look cool, so I'm all for it. A lot of people on the boards were like, stinky! Stinky poo! But I like it. So shut up."
(Erin Dailey, "Maternal Instinct," page 1, Television Without Pity, http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=75&story=9188)
Made-up citation: "With my thick, mangy locks, I could go mini-Rasta-y, mega-Rasta-y, or holy-god-check-out-that-hair."
come-dump-o-rama
noun. This may involve a strumpet.
Related terms: come-dump, cum-dump.
Real citation: "Come-Dump-O-Rama!"
(Adrian Ryan, "Celebrity I Saw U," March 23, 2006, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=31243)
Made-up citation: "I haven't read this Da Vinci Code thing. What does it suggest, that Mary motherhumpin' Magdalene wasn't a come-dump-o-rama?"
Related terms: come-dump, cum-dump.
Real citation: "Come-Dump-O-Rama!"
(Adrian Ryan, "Celebrity I Saw U," March 23, 2006, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=31243)
Made-up citation: "I haven't read this Da Vinci Code thing. What does it suggest, that Mary motherhumpin' Magdalene wasn't a come-dump-o-rama?"
non-turdly
adverb. Non-excrementally.
Real citation: "This is one of the reasons why the stock-configured Mustang suspension is a turd. You can polish that turd by greatly increasing spring rates and only moderately lowering the car. Then, you can buff the turd out and add some perfume by replacing the rear suspension with a torque arm, losing the UCAs, and adding a proper lateral link such as a Panhard bar. This will allow you to put the rear RC where you want it. Finally, you can flush the turd and buy a Vette or NSX or some such car with a non-turdly suspension."
(Msquared, March 5, 2001, http://forums.corner-carvers.com/showpost.php?p=537&postcount=12)
Made-up citation: "Introducing my puppy to a non-turdly indoor lifestyle is more than a job; it's a frackin' adventure."
Real citation: "This is one of the reasons why the stock-configured Mustang suspension is a turd. You can polish that turd by greatly increasing spring rates and only moderately lowering the car. Then, you can buff the turd out and add some perfume by replacing the rear suspension with a torque arm, losing the UCAs, and adding a proper lateral link such as a Panhard bar. This will allow you to put the rear RC where you want it. Finally, you can flush the turd and buy a Vette or NSX or some such car with a non-turdly suspension."
(Msquared, March 5, 2001, http://forums.corner-carvers.com/showpost.php?p=537&postcount=12)
Made-up citation: "Introducing my puppy to a non-turdly indoor lifestyle is more than a job; it's a frackin' adventure."
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
arch-nemesisness
noun. The essence possessed by all arch-nemesises, from Lex Luthor to Sideshow Bob.
Related terms: nemesisness, nemesisless.
Real citation: "since you’ve exchanged now greetings, he can no longer pretend he’s not aware of your arch-nemesisness. i’d proceed with caution if i were you."
(Patricia, March 2, 2005, http://wiw.org/~jess/archives/2005/03/02/fedora-and-cigar/)
Made-up citation: "Commander Cuckoo-Bananas has been so successful because no one in the Democratic party or the press has more arch-nemesisness than a dishrag soaked in milk and tears."
Related terms: nemesisness, nemesisless.
Real citation: "since you’ve exchanged now greetings, he can no longer pretend he’s not aware of your arch-nemesisness. i’d proceed with caution if i were you."
(Patricia, March 2, 2005, http://wiw.org/~jess/archives/2005/03/02/fedora-and-cigar/)
Made-up citation: "Commander Cuckoo-Bananas has been so successful because no one in the Democratic party or the press has more arch-nemesisness than a dishrag soaked in milk and tears."
fucktardistic
adj. Not fucking scoring in the highest percentile of the SAT.
Real citation: "Ok, now that´s just fucktardistic to the third degree. And, yes, the posters for the original Saw had the exact same gimmick, so, I dunno why they didn´t say anything when the first one came out."
(Mr. Grouchy, Aug. 23, 2005, http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/comments/?entryid=232889)
Made-up citation: "I am not a God-fearing man, but I am a Goddamn fucktardistic dude."
Real citation: "Ok, now that´s just fucktardistic to the third degree. And, yes, the posters for the original Saw had the exact same gimmick, so, I dunno why they didn´t say anything when the first one came out."
(Mr. Grouchy, Aug. 23, 2005, http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/comments/?entryid=232889)
Made-up citation: "I am not a God-fearing man, but I am a Goddamn fucktardistic dude."
Friday, April 28, 2006
assmunchitude
noun. Look deep into the soul or pants of an assmunch, and this ye shall find.
Related terms: buttmunchitude.
Real citation: "I have to say I'm proud of 'Jack' this week for showing much less assmunchitude during his farewell speech to Meri-De."
(myriad, "Outback Jack," July 29, 2004, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3117193&view=findpost&p=1738444)
Made-up citation: "Mike Judge discovered assmunchitude, much like Darwin discovered evolution. I have discovered that I need TP for my bunghole."
Related terms: buttmunchitude.
Real citation: "I have to say I'm proud of 'Jack' this week for showing much less assmunchitude during his farewell speech to Meri-De."
(myriad, "Outback Jack," July 29, 2004, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=3117193&view=findpost&p=1738444)
Made-up citation: "Mike Judge discovered assmunchitude, much like Darwin discovered evolution. I have discovered that I need TP for my bunghole."
bugshitted
adj. Mentally wacky, with a pinch of bugfuck, a whiff of batshit, and a mound of postal.
Real citation: "Although Arcanum was love, VtM:B was released with a bug that pretty much keeled the game until the patch, and ToEE was a bugshitted mess that still hasn't been fixed (although some of the blame for that can be put on the publisher)."
(http://72.14.203.104/search?q=cache:uAQPYBx0HQ0J:www.cell-phones-info.us/pc-icons.html+bugshitted&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1)
Made-up citation: "When my puppy is in my lap, manically chomping on a toy frog, with a bugshitted gleam in his eye, I'm a happy puppy daddy."
Real citation: "Although Arcanum was love, VtM:B was released with a bug that pretty much keeled the game until the patch, and ToEE was a bugshitted mess that still hasn't been fixed (although some of the blame for that can be put on the publisher)."
(http://72.14.203.104/search?q=cache:uAQPYBx0HQ0J:www.cell-phones-info.us/pc-icons.html+bugshitted&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1)
Made-up citation: "When my puppy is in my lap, manically chomping on a toy frog, with a bugshitted gleam in his eye, I'm a happy puppy daddy."
Thursday, April 27, 2006
jackasshead
noun. Jackhole plus asshole plus headhole minus three holes.
Real citation: "we ended up scalping tix for face outside, so we went in. they sounded great, except we had this jackasshead yelling the lines to every song standing right next to us. and I mean yelling."
(swetsatonic, May 20, 2004, http://poltz.com/vbulletin/printthread.php?s=9141f18c4d7e00c141ac741641a1d2e8&threadid=5557)
Made-up citation: "I'd rather be a jackasshead than an asshead. That's just the way I was raised."
Real citation: "we ended up scalping tix for face outside, so we went in. they sounded great, except we had this jackasshead yelling the lines to every song standing right next to us. and I mean yelling."
(swetsatonic, May 20, 2004, http://poltz.com/vbulletin/printthread.php?s=9141f18c4d7e00c141ac741641a1d2e8&threadid=5557)
Made-up citation: "I'd rather be a jackasshead than an asshead. That's just the way I was raised."
toe lickage
noun. Mmm...toe-tongue-bath-fest.
Real citation: "Total Toe Lickage! All Evilrip ever want is to have his toes licked, for reasons unbeknownst to the common net addict. you should probably just ask him yourself!"
(http://www.feenyx.net/pplz.html)
Made-up citation: "Lipstick lesbians, lipstick librarians, and latte liberals love toe lickage, Lutherans lament."
Real citation: "Total Toe Lickage! All Evilrip ever want is to have his toes licked, for reasons unbeknownst to the common net addict. you should probably just ask him yourself!"
(http://www.feenyx.net/pplz.html)
Made-up citation: "Lipstick lesbians, lipstick librarians, and latte liberals love toe lickage, Lutherans lament."
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
lady balls
noun. The seat of testicular-fortitude-y power in the female frame of mind.
Real citation: "Folks, that takes balls--lady balls. We call 'em 'Thatchers.'"
(Stephen Colbert, April 24, 2006, The Colbert Report)
Made-up citation: "According to a recent poll, a lady with lady balls is preferable to a dude with man-boobs."
Real citation: "Folks, that takes balls--lady balls. We call 'em 'Thatchers.'"
(Stephen Colbert, April 24, 2006, The Colbert Report)
Made-up citation: "According to a recent poll, a lady with lady balls is preferable to a dude with man-boobs."
fetusesque
adj. Or maybe it's just a naked mole rat...
Real citation: "Jay Alan Sekulow of the Pat Robertson-affiliated American Center for Law and Justice -- what's that you say? A center for law and justice? And they're American? Whatever they say must be right -- says the center "decided to enter the case after concluding that acceptance of the gay rights arguments by the court might provide a constitutional foundation for same-sex marriage." The Family Research Council -- formerly headed by Gary Bauer, the most fetusesque presidential candidate since, well, Steve Forbes, who got into the 2000 race a couple of weeks before Bauer -- says that the Texas law represents "a reasonable means of promoting and protecting marriage -- the union of a man and a woman.""
(Joe Rospars, March 21, 2003, That Other Blog, http://thatother.blogspot.com/2003_03_01_thatother_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Casual Friday has been more successful than Pagan rituals like Fetusesque Friday."
Real citation: "Jay Alan Sekulow of the Pat Robertson-affiliated American Center for Law and Justice -- what's that you say? A center for law and justice? And they're American? Whatever they say must be right -- says the center "decided to enter the case after concluding that acceptance of the gay rights arguments by the court might provide a constitutional foundation for same-sex marriage." The Family Research Council -- formerly headed by Gary Bauer, the most fetusesque presidential candidate since, well, Steve Forbes, who got into the 2000 race a couple of weeks before Bauer -- says that the Texas law represents "a reasonable means of promoting and protecting marriage -- the union of a man and a woman.""
(Joe Rospars, March 21, 2003, That Other Blog, http://thatother.blogspot.com/2003_03_01_thatother_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Casual Friday has been more successful than Pagan rituals like Fetusesque Friday."
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
hamsterslaughter
noun. A crime of small, adorable proportions.
Related terms: dogslaughter, catslaughter, monkeyslaughter, ratslaughter, phoneslaughter.
Real citation: "LOL, if i did it was hamsterslaughter, im sure i wont be judged!"
(malibufighty, April 21, 2005, http://www.malibustacey.com/cgi-bin/bbs/webbbs_config.pl?noframes;read=5892)
Made-up citation: "If you're a snake, I'm pretty sure hamsterslaughter is legal (though not always carried out)."
Related terms: dogslaughter, catslaughter, monkeyslaughter, ratslaughter, phoneslaughter.
Real citation: "LOL, if i did it was hamsterslaughter, im sure i wont be judged!"
(malibufighty, April 21, 2005, http://www.malibustacey.com/cgi-bin/bbs/webbbs_config.pl?noframes;read=5892)
Made-up citation: "If you're a snake, I'm pretty sure hamsterslaughter is legal (though not always carried out)."
non-honkified
adj. Non-whitey.
Real citation: "There’s a sushi joint in St. Bubba (the town where I work) that has become a favorite among my coworkers. Even Erin has been there; in the weird little downtown that comprises St. Bubba’s feistily non-corporate shopping drag (contrasted with its evil gentrified mall), there are number of funky (and sometimes even good) ethnic joints, including Burmese, more-than-adequate Mexican, and non-honkified Chinese."
(Dave, "Wait--This is Korean?", Jan. 4, 2006, http://www.chickenorbeef.net/wordpress/archives/2006/01/04/wait-this-is-korean/)
Made-up citation: "Lately, 'diverse' has been used as a synonym for 'black' or 'man, there's a lot of minorities here.' This non-diverse sense of 'diverse' also means 'non-honkified.'"
Real citation: "There’s a sushi joint in St. Bubba (the town where I work) that has become a favorite among my coworkers. Even Erin has been there; in the weird little downtown that comprises St. Bubba’s feistily non-corporate shopping drag (contrasted with its evil gentrified mall), there are number of funky (and sometimes even good) ethnic joints, including Burmese, more-than-adequate Mexican, and non-honkified Chinese."
(Dave, "Wait--This is Korean?", Jan. 4, 2006, http://www.chickenorbeef.net/wordpress/archives/2006/01/04/wait-this-is-korean/)
Made-up citation: "Lately, 'diverse' has been used as a synonym for 'black' or 'man, there's a lot of minorities here.' This non-diverse sense of 'diverse' also means 'non-honkified.'"
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
neurodoublefucked
adj. Brain go boom!
Real citation: "I am now officially a SHO in Care of the Neurofucked, albeit a slightly ill one. Since my hallowed instituition is a tertiary centre, everybody is intensely clever. So clever, in fact, that if they hear hooves then they just know it's gotta be a zebra. Being so terribly clever, we only deal with the really big cases. To get through our doors, it's no good just being neurofucked - no, let the plebs in the other hospitals deal with that. Baby, if you wanna hang with the wunderkinder then you gotta get yourself neurodoublefucked, and preferably in a confusing way."
(Jan. 6, 2006, Confessions of a Venial Sinner, http://venialsinner.blogspot.com/2006/01/arbeit-macht-frei.html)
Made-up citation: "As the Bible says, 'The neurodoublefucked shall inherit the earth.' And it didn't even take that long."
Real citation: "I am now officially a SHO in Care of the Neurofucked, albeit a slightly ill one. Since my hallowed instituition is a tertiary centre, everybody is intensely clever. So clever, in fact, that if they hear hooves then they just know it's gotta be a zebra. Being so terribly clever, we only deal with the really big cases. To get through our doors, it's no good just being neurofucked - no, let the plebs in the other hospitals deal with that. Baby, if you wanna hang with the wunderkinder then you gotta get yourself neurodoublefucked, and preferably in a confusing way."
(Jan. 6, 2006, Confessions of a Venial Sinner, http://venialsinner.blogspot.com/2006/01/arbeit-macht-frei.html)
Made-up citation: "As the Bible says, 'The neurodoublefucked shall inherit the earth.' And it didn't even take that long."
Odin-y
adj. Much like the God of thunder. Actually, more like the God of...one-eyed badasses with ravens?
Real citation: "Giles seems more 'Odin-y,' which the whole detached-from-the-fray Watcher thing, and the research / book-learnin' stuff subbing for Odin's watchful nature (having two Raven spies, Hugin and Munin, and an 'all-seeing throne' at the top of the world in Hildskialf) and knowledge of the runes, which are the keys to all things in creation."
(Set, "Making Our Own Fun: Rewriting 'Buffy,'" Sept. 15, 2005, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=2806070&view=findpost&p=3596340)
Made-up citation: "My new rat terrier is quite adorable, though not very Odin-y."
Real citation: "Giles seems more 'Odin-y,' which the whole detached-from-the-fray Watcher thing, and the research / book-learnin' stuff subbing for Odin's watchful nature (having two Raven spies, Hugin and Munin, and an 'all-seeing throne' at the top of the world in Hildskialf) and knowledge of the runes, which are the keys to all things in creation."
(Set, "Making Our Own Fun: Rewriting 'Buffy,'" Sept. 15, 2005, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=2806070&view=findpost&p=3596340)
Made-up citation: "My new rat terrier is quite adorable, though not very Odin-y."
pigfornicator
noun. Pork-plooker. Bacon-boinker!
Real citation: "Or they're training the new Gertie to become Safe's "special friend" here on this newsgroup. Didn't our favorite pigfornicator lose his favorite target when the cult decided that Dennis Erlich was right all along about the Co$ being evil?"
(Chris Leithiser, June 10, 1999, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.religion.scientology/
msg/539735b1eecc235f)
Made-up citation: "The way of the pigfornicator is a salty lifestyle indeed."
Real citation: "Or they're training the new Gertie to become Safe's "special friend" here on this newsgroup. Didn't our favorite pigfornicator lose his favorite target when the cult decided that Dennis Erlich was right all along about the Co$ being evil?"
(Chris Leithiser, June 10, 1999, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.religion.scientology/
msg/539735b1eecc235f)
Made-up citation: "The way of the pigfornicator is a salty lifestyle indeed."
Friday, April 14, 2006
batcrapitude
noun. That's sheer lunacy!
Related terms: batshit loony, batshit whacko, batshit insane, batshit nutty, batshit nutso, super-batshit-insane, completely-fucking-batshit-insane, batshit-fucking-crazy, batshit-sounding, non-batshit, pre-batshit, anti-batshit, batshit loonball, holy batshit, batshittery, batcrap, batpoop.
Real citation: "But Galvy wins by sure badassitude. Or is it batcrapitude..."
(Malancthon, Feb. 15, 2005, http://forums.transfandom.com/invboard/index.php?showtopic=25479&st=20)
Made-up citation: "By the end of Lost, if every character is chock full o' bugfuck batcrapitude, I'll be a very happy boy."
Related terms: batshit loony, batshit whacko, batshit insane, batshit nutty, batshit nutso, super-batshit-insane, completely-fucking-batshit-insane, batshit-fucking-crazy, batshit-sounding, non-batshit, pre-batshit, anti-batshit, batshit loonball, holy batshit, batshittery, batcrap, batpoop.
Real citation: "But Galvy wins by sure badassitude. Or is it batcrapitude..."
(Malancthon, Feb. 15, 2005, http://forums.transfandom.com/invboard/index.php?showtopic=25479&st=20)
Made-up citation: "By the end of Lost, if every character is chock full o' bugfuck batcrapitude, I'll be a very happy boy."
anti-jeebusness
noun. Um, not that I would know anything about that. Nope. Not me. I love all religions, even the ones that believe in leprechauns and Xenu.
Real citation: "As for undisclosed anti-jeebusness, unless a product states that it contains nothing anti-jeebus, there's no reason to sue them. If I say that a movie contains no nudity, and it contains nudity, well, then I'm a lying dork."
(Nik, May 21, 2004, http://www.brosenbex.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=2135&view=previous&sid=40771e7b707561f66d9b004d41f2fd5e)
Made-up citation: "Since Christ was a cowboy, anti-jeebusness has made many a Christian say, 'Sweet jumping Jesus!'"
Real citation: "As for undisclosed anti-jeebusness, unless a product states that it contains nothing anti-jeebus, there's no reason to sue them. If I say that a movie contains no nudity, and it contains nudity, well, then I'm a lying dork."
(Nik, May 21, 2004, http://www.brosenbex.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=2135&view=previous&sid=40771e7b707561f66d9b004d41f2fd5e)
Made-up citation: "Since Christ was a cowboy, anti-jeebusness has made many a Christian say, 'Sweet jumping Jesus!'"
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
aneurysmometer
noun. A precise, metaphorical-aneurysm-detecting device.
Real citation: "Luckily, I have prepared for this eventuality, and had my science friends whip me up a handy Aneurysmometer."
("Cranium...or Lawn Sprinkler?" August 30, 2004, You Are Dumb, http://www.youaredumb.net/archive/2005/11/08)
Made-up citation: "How much for the smoothie-maker/aneurysmometer?"
Real citation: "Luckily, I have prepared for this eventuality, and had my science friends whip me up a handy Aneurysmometer."
("Cranium...or Lawn Sprinkler?" August 30, 2004, You Are Dumb, http://www.youaredumb.net/archive/2005/11/08)
Made-up citation: "How much for the smoothie-maker/aneurysmometer?"
anal-probish
adj. Oh, the humanity!
Real citation: "G, please don't confuse them with the people in an anal probish meeting for Area 51, the real men in black wear Hawaiian shorts, sandals and have shirts that say something like: "OMFG! I pwnz a 4d10 hammer!"."
(Amakusha, June 13, 2005, http://www.barracksnetwork.com/forum/printthread.php?t=2098)
Made-up citation: "Learn more about minimally anal-probish surgery and get a free bagel tonight!"
Real citation: "G, please don't confuse them with the people in an anal probish meeting for Area 51, the real men in black wear Hawaiian shorts, sandals and have shirts that say something like: "OMFG! I pwnz a 4d10 hammer!"."
(Amakusha, June 13, 2005, http://www.barracksnetwork.com/forum/printthread.php?t=2098)
Made-up citation: "Learn more about minimally anal-probish surgery and get a free bagel tonight!"
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
wack-assage
noun. Like pornography, hard to define and easy to spot.
Related terms: wackassitude.
Real citation: "Cyrus: 'Oh, good. I am not alone in the wack-assage.'"
(http://www.iago.net/amber/kings/sessions/001_quotes.html)
Made-up citation: "Warning: consumption of alcohol during pregnancy may result in wack-assage and crack-babyage."
Related terms: wackassitude.
Real citation: "Cyrus: 'Oh, good. I am not alone in the wack-assage.'"
(http://www.iago.net/amber/kings/sessions/001_quotes.html)
Made-up citation: "Warning: consumption of alcohol during pregnancy may result in wack-assage and crack-babyage."
groinly
adverb. Loinly
Real citation: "My next big injury didn't happen until 5 years later. Since no names are being mentioned, I could be quite candid about it. It was an inexperienced tea-bagging incident. Meant to be an awesome night, but ended up in a ball of awkwardness and groinly displeasure."
(Aug. 9, 2005, http://www.tabulas.com/~ghost_tree/954278.html)
Made-up citation: "'Groinly' is not a perfect substitute for 'crotchly,' as many Robert Frost poems unfortunately demonstrate."
Real citation: "My next big injury didn't happen until 5 years later. Since no names are being mentioned, I could be quite candid about it. It was an inexperienced tea-bagging incident. Meant to be an awesome night, but ended up in a ball of awkwardness and groinly displeasure."
(Aug. 9, 2005, http://www.tabulas.com/~ghost_tree/954278.html)
Made-up citation: "'Groinly' is not a perfect substitute for 'crotchly,' as many Robert Frost poems unfortunately demonstrate."
Monday, April 10, 2006
jerkbuttface
noun. A fighting word, sure to impugn a nicknamee's character, face, and bippy.
Real citation: "I was seriously concerned when you mentioned you had a lump on your cock, although as Mildo mentioned that cancerous lumps typically grow on the nutsack. I'm glad it's not a serious lump, but thanks for the scare, jerkbuttface."
(Walid Khouretsoli, Sept. 8, 2005, http://groups.google.com/group/KILROY/msg/a535ccedcfe49292?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "As Billy Corgan wrote, 'The jerkbuttface in you is the jerkbuttface in me.'"
Real citation: "I was seriously concerned when you mentioned you had a lump on your cock, although as Mildo mentioned that cancerous lumps typically grow on the nutsack. I'm glad it's not a serious lump, but thanks for the scare, jerkbuttface."
(Walid Khouretsoli, Sept. 8, 2005, http://groups.google.com/group/KILROY/msg/a535ccedcfe49292?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "As Billy Corgan wrote, 'The jerkbuttface in you is the jerkbuttface in me.'"
absofracking
adverb. For fans of Battlestar Galactica, an affirmative word.
Related terms: absodiddly, absoforking, absofreaking, absofricking, absofucking.
Real citation: "I absofracking love Gentoo..and linux as a whole. I just don't know what to do with the system."
(crab, June 27, 2004, http://www.spamjeebus.com/forum/printthread.php?t=1475)
Made-up citation: "Without the Seinfeld terms 'low talker,' 'high talker,' and 'close talker,' I absofracking don't know how I'd make fun of others' yakking deficiencies."
Related terms: absodiddly, absoforking, absofreaking, absofricking, absofucking.
Real citation: "I absofracking love Gentoo..and linux as a whole. I just don't know what to do with the system."
(crab, June 27, 2004, http://www.spamjeebus.com/forum/printthread.php?t=1475)
Made-up citation: "Without the Seinfeld terms 'low talker,' 'high talker,' and 'close talker,' I absofracking don't know how I'd make fun of others' yakking deficiencies."
Friday, April 07, 2006
extraordinary equestrian
noun. A horsefucker.
Real citation: "Brushing them, caressing them, feeding them, riding them—these people are always with horses, and horses are always with them. So what truly differentiates an average equestrian from an extraordinary equestrian? One way or the other, both derive pleasure from horses."
(Charles Munde, "The Animal in You," Feb. 23, 2006, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=30811)
Made-up citation: "Being an extraordinary equestrian comes with extraordinary responsibilities. Whoops, he died, never mind."
Real citation: "Brushing them, caressing them, feeding them, riding them—these people are always with horses, and horses are always with them. So what truly differentiates an average equestrian from an extraordinary equestrian? One way or the other, both derive pleasure from horses."
(Charles Munde, "The Animal in You," Feb. 23, 2006, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=30811)
Made-up citation: "Being an extraordinary equestrian comes with extraordinary responsibilities. Whoops, he died, never mind."
stalkerifficness
noun. A very dudely quality.
Real citation: "Hee hee. I've had it for a while now. XD I'm all sneaky with the stalkerifficness, ne?"
(Chanie, Nov. 3, 2005, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=2978963)
Made-up citation: "Stalkerifficness is next to Godliness--if your God is a fucking psycho."
Real citation: "Hee hee. I've had it for a while now. XD I'm all sneaky with the stalkerifficness, ne?"
(Chanie, Nov. 3, 2005, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=2978963)
Made-up citation: "Stalkerifficness is next to Godliness--if your God is a fucking psycho."
Thursday, April 06, 2006
satanosity
noun. Look deep into the soul of Satan, a Satanic cult, or a plate of Satanically hot chicken wings, and this ye shall find.
Real citation: "No other takers, eh? Well, you were close, sort of. No satanosity is involved, however. The obscure reference of the week is to the revised year of X-day, which for the uninformed in all things Yeti is the day the pleasure saucers come to take away those who have sufficient slack and have sent in their $30."
(May 30, 2002, groups.google.com/group/alt.religion.kibology/msg/2b4c1e76a184e095?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Neither my labradoodle Betty nor my cockerpoo Veronica has much satanosity."
Real citation: "No other takers, eh? Well, you were close, sort of. No satanosity is involved, however. The obscure reference of the week is to the revised year of X-day, which for the uninformed in all things Yeti is the day the pleasure saucers come to take away those who have sufficient slack and have sent in their $30."
(May 30, 2002, groups.google.com/group/alt.religion.kibology/msg/2b4c1e76a184e095?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Neither my labradoodle Betty nor my cockerpoo Veronica has much satanosity."
sexbombish
adj. Possessing a veritable kerblooey of sexy, sexual, sexalicious qualities.
Real citation: "Ev, meanwhile, was played by Leslie Parrish. Ms. Parrish played a number of sexbombish roles in the ‘50s through the ‘70s. Her most famous role was as the fiancée of the Laurence Harvey character in the paranoid classic The Manchurian Candidate. Following this film she acted in two more crappy B-movies before retiring from the screen."
(Kem Begg, "Video Cheese," http://www.jabootu.com/vcnovohthree.htm)
Made-up citation: "Like the jackass penguin, the sexbombish aardvark is misnamed."
Real citation: "Ev, meanwhile, was played by Leslie Parrish. Ms. Parrish played a number of sexbombish roles in the ‘50s through the ‘70s. Her most famous role was as the fiancée of the Laurence Harvey character in the paranoid classic The Manchurian Candidate. Following this film she acted in two more crappy B-movies before retiring from the screen."
(Kem Begg, "Video Cheese," http://www.jabootu.com/vcnovohthree.htm)
Made-up citation: "Like the jackass penguin, the sexbombish aardvark is misnamed."
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
popcorn-action-flick-y
adj. With lots o' explosions and extra butter.
Real citation: "Good to see so many Wire fans. I love both shows. The Shield is a little popcorn-action-flick-y next to The Wire, but at the same time it is so much better than just about every thing else on tv."
(orion choachly, "The Shield," Feb. 11, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=1569855&view=findpost&p=4510752)
Made-up citation: "My life is neither popcorn-action-flick-y nor amateur-porny. It is somewhat minty."
Real citation: "Good to see so many Wire fans. I love both shows. The Shield is a little popcorn-action-flick-y next to The Wire, but at the same time it is so much better than just about every thing else on tv."
(orion choachly, "The Shield," Feb. 11, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=1569855&view=findpost&p=4510752)
Made-up citation: "My life is neither popcorn-action-flick-y nor amateur-porny. It is somewhat minty."
jerkoffitude
noun. Usually, a metaphorical wankfest.
Related terms: days-offitude, lay-offitude, pissed-offitude, peel-offitude, rip-offitude, show-offitude.
Real citation: "Exhausting jerkoffitude? Lots."
(Steely Rob, "EPIC GLOBAL ORGIES," March 30, 2004, http://www.skullgame.com/archives/000640.html)
Made-up citation: "I thought I understood jerkoffitude well...then I went to grad school."
Related terms: days-offitude, lay-offitude, pissed-offitude, peel-offitude, rip-offitude, show-offitude.
Real citation: "Exhausting jerkoffitude? Lots."
(Steely Rob, "EPIC GLOBAL ORGIES," March 30, 2004, http://www.skullgame.com/archives/000640.html)
Made-up citation: "I thought I understood jerkoffitude well...then I went to grad school."
Friday, March 31, 2006
I-really-couldn't-give-a-fuckness
noun. Apathy. Zen. Whatev.
Related terms: could-give-a-fuckness, couldn't-give-a-fuckness, don’t-give-a-fuckness, give-a-fuckness, I-don't-give-a-fuckness, non-give-a-fuckness.
Real citation: "So, best usage goes to Snoop Dogg for the sheer I-really-couldn't-give-a-fuckness of it, second to Green Day for being cheeky but sincere, third place goes to elderly blonde Madonna who at least gets sympathy points for getting caught up in the Dogg/Razorlight roll."
(Rowan, "Soil the Beeb," July 3, 2002, Jet Set Web Blog, http://www.jetsetweblog.com/_ablog.php?month=7&year=2005&neuron=4)
Made-up citation: "When you feel someone is heaven-on-a-biscuit, but you feel like crap-on-cracker, it's hard to project a suave aura of I-really-couldn't-give-a-fuckness."
Related terms: could-give-a-fuckness, couldn't-give-a-fuckness, don’t-give-a-fuckness, give-a-fuckness, I-don't-give-a-fuckness, non-give-a-fuckness.
Real citation: "So, best usage goes to Snoop Dogg for the sheer I-really-couldn't-give-a-fuckness of it, second to Green Day for being cheeky but sincere, third place goes to elderly blonde Madonna who at least gets sympathy points for getting caught up in the Dogg/Razorlight roll."
(Rowan, "Soil the Beeb," July 3, 2002, Jet Set Web Blog, http://www.jetsetweblog.com/_ablog.php?month=7&year=2005&neuron=4)
Made-up citation: "When you feel someone is heaven-on-a-biscuit, but you feel like crap-on-cracker, it's hard to project a suave aura of I-really-couldn't-give-a-fuckness."
non-quailtard-shaped
adj. Not even slightly resembling a bird with low SAT scores and a poorly constructed nest.
Real citation: "Yes, there's plenty of non-quailtard-shaped targets to blast at. You got your cartoon riots, your winter Olympics with not enough brothers in it, your Filipino mudslide (which, despite what you might have heard, is neither a sex act NOR a dessert at TGI McScratchy's). People are even stealing prosthetic legs. Oh, and Dick Cheney shot some geezer in the fucking face!"
(CK, "About Time," Feb. 17, 2006, tubesocket, http://tubesocket.tv/archive/2006_02_12_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Whether designing birthday cakes or dildoes, non-quailtard-shaped is a good way to go."
Real citation: "Yes, there's plenty of non-quailtard-shaped targets to blast at. You got your cartoon riots, your winter Olympics with not enough brothers in it, your Filipino mudslide (which, despite what you might have heard, is neither a sex act NOR a dessert at TGI McScratchy's). People are even stealing prosthetic legs. Oh, and Dick Cheney shot some geezer in the fucking face!"
(CK, "About Time," Feb. 17, 2006, tubesocket, http://tubesocket.tv/archive/2006_02_12_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Whether designing birthday cakes or dildoes, non-quailtard-shaped is a good way to go."
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
emotional fuckbuddy
noun. A near and dear lustbunny of a non-groiny nature.
Real citation: "I'm kind of glad McDreamy and Meredith are trying the friendship angle. They've been physical fuckbuddies and emotional fuckbuddies, but they haven't just been there with one another. It could be very telling as to where their relationship goes."
(jopatura, "2-20: "What Have I Done To Deserve This" 2006.02.26," Feb. 26, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=3136209&view=findpost&p=4617282)
Made-up citation: "Like saber-toothed rabbits, emotional fuckbuddies are seldom seen in the wild. But they do exist, dear readers."
Real citation: "I'm kind of glad McDreamy and Meredith are trying the friendship angle. They've been physical fuckbuddies and emotional fuckbuddies, but they haven't just been there with one another. It could be very telling as to where their relationship goes."
(jopatura, "2-20: "What Have I Done To Deserve This" 2006.02.26," Feb. 26, 2006, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=3136209&view=findpost&p=4617282)
Made-up citation: "Like saber-toothed rabbits, emotional fuckbuddies are seldom seen in the wild. But they do exist, dear readers."
buttockial region
noun. Smells like ass. Tastes like ass. It's ass.
Related terms: buttockal region.
Real citation: "Kiss my Buttockial region. Love, Rahn"
(http://www.anomalies-unlimited.com/Odd%20Pics%202/BugReplies.html)
Made-up citation: "For proctologists, a deep and abiding love of the buttockial region begins in childhood."
Related terms: buttockal region.
Real citation: "Kiss my Buttockial region. Love, Rahn"
(http://www.anomalies-unlimited.com/Odd%20Pics%202/BugReplies.html)
Made-up citation: "For proctologists, a deep and abiding love of the buttockial region begins in childhood."
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
stroke one's schooner
idiom. Mmm...one's schooner.
Real citation: "Oh, hi! You caught me stroking my schooner."
(Stephen Colbert, March 20, 2006, The Colbert Report)
Made-up citation: "Stroking the schooner, like waxing the dolphin, is a fine naval activity."
Real citation: "Oh, hi! You caught me stroking my schooner."
(Stephen Colbert, March 20, 2006, The Colbert Report)
Made-up citation: "Stroking the schooner, like waxing the dolphin, is a fine naval activity."
make a naughty
idiom. Defe-fuckin'-cation, folks.
Related terms: make a no-no.
Real citation: "Yes, it is a bit much for Don Imus to have a sudden attack of Emily Post and start grouching about the political comments chestily flown at Coretta Scott King's funeral service in the presence of President Bush and his lovely wife Rita. Racial enlightment has never been a shining hallmark of the Imus show, from the verbal blackface of their Sambo caricatures of black celebrities to Sid Rosenberg's infamous dig at the Williams sisters to Imus's own use of the 'n' word, which he first denied, then admitted sheepishly, as if he had been caught making a naughty.*"
(James Wolcott, Feb. 8, 2006, http://jameswolcott.com/archives/2006/02/appeasing_the_g.php)
Made-up citation: "I'm planning on getting a puppy, so I'd better prepare myself--mentally and cleaning-product-wise--for the first time he makes a naughty on the carpet."
Related terms: make a no-no.
Real citation: "Yes, it is a bit much for Don Imus to have a sudden attack of Emily Post and start grouching about the political comments chestily flown at Coretta Scott King's funeral service in the presence of President Bush and his lovely wife Rita. Racial enlightment has never been a shining hallmark of the Imus show, from the verbal blackface of their Sambo caricatures of black celebrities to Sid Rosenberg's infamous dig at the Williams sisters to Imus's own use of the 'n' word, which he first denied, then admitted sheepishly, as if he had been caught making a naughty.*"
(James Wolcott, Feb. 8, 2006, http://jameswolcott.com/archives/2006/02/appeasing_the_g.php)
Made-up citation: "I'm planning on getting a puppy, so I'd better prepare myself--mentally and cleaning-product-wise--for the first time he makes a naughty on the carpet."
Monday, March 27, 2006
evilholic
noun. Evil is so addictive. And minty.
Real citation: "Another analogy is that he's like a evilholic, he has an addiction to evil."
(Ken, Feb. 12, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.tv.buffy-v-slayer/msg/4bff9a3373a4e2e8)
Made-up citation: "Not every evildoer is an evil genius, just as not every evil genius is an evilholic. Not even every bowl of pea soup is evil, according to paleontologists at a local research university."
Real citation: "Another analogy is that he's like a evilholic, he has an addiction to evil."
(Ken, Feb. 12, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.tv.buffy-v-slayer/msg/4bff9a3373a4e2e8)
Made-up citation: "Not every evildoer is an evil genius, just as not every evil genius is an evilholic. Not even every bowl of pea soup is evil, according to paleontologists at a local research university."
boohooage
noun. Wah. Waaaaaaaahhh! Waah.
Real citation: "Hootie and the Blowjob drowned in their own tears after a dolphin made them cry. According to police reports, the aquatic mammal's bottlenose was mistaken for a penis and the impending "Eek eek!" scared the bejesus out of the band, setting off a deluge of boohooage. The porpoise of the sudden outburst is still unknown, but it is thought that lead vocalist Darius Rucker may have failed to cover his teeth."
(coldpizza, Feb. 6, 2006, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=16239904)
Made-up citation: "Did the demise of South Park's Chef or The Shield's Lemonhead cause more boohooage in your diocese, Father?"
Real citation: "Hootie and the Blowjob drowned in their own tears after a dolphin made them cry. According to police reports, the aquatic mammal's bottlenose was mistaken for a penis and the impending "Eek eek!" scared the bejesus out of the band, setting off a deluge of boohooage. The porpoise of the sudden outburst is still unknown, but it is thought that lead vocalist Darius Rucker may have failed to cover his teeth."
(coldpizza, Feb. 6, 2006, http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=16239904)
Made-up citation: "Did the demise of South Park's Chef or The Shield's Lemonhead cause more boohooage in your diocese, Father?"
Friday, March 24, 2006
dooky-wipe
noun. A close (possibly inbred) relative of the shitstain.
Related terms: asswipe, buttwipe, fuckwipe, shitwipe.
Real citation: "Will they kill each other? PROBABLY. And it's all because YOU can't be satisfied with a bunch of nice people talking about nice things, or TV columnists who don't use the word "dooky-wipes." YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED."
(William Steven Humphrey, "I Love TV," March 16, 2006, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=31153)
Made-up citation: "The upcoming biography Dooky-Wipe-in-Chief: Portrait of President Short Bus will be made into a movie featuring Will Ferrell. In my dreams."
Related terms: asswipe, buttwipe, fuckwipe, shitwipe.
Real citation: "Will they kill each other? PROBABLY. And it's all because YOU can't be satisfied with a bunch of nice people talking about nice things, or TV columnists who don't use the word "dooky-wipes." YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED."
(William Steven Humphrey, "I Love TV," March 16, 2006, The Stranger, http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Content?oid=31153)
Made-up citation: "The upcoming biography Dooky-Wipe-in-Chief: Portrait of President Short Bus will be made into a movie featuring Will Ferrell. In my dreams."
pregitude
noun. Somebody got knocked up.
Real citation: "Update on various pop cultural impressions. (I'm still encountering incidences of pregitude with alarming regularity.)"
(belsum, April 4, 2005, Knocked Up, http://belsum.blogspot.com/2005_04_01_belsum_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Do the perils of pregitude outweigh the joys of childbirth? Depends how much you want some crotchfruit."
Real citation: "Update on various pop cultural impressions. (I'm still encountering incidences of pregitude with alarming regularity.)"
(belsum, April 4, 2005, Knocked Up, http://belsum.blogspot.com/2005_04_01_belsum_archive.html)
Made-up citation: "Do the perils of pregitude outweigh the joys of childbirth? Depends how much you want some crotchfruit."
Thursday, March 23, 2006
geishariffic
adj. Terrifically teeming with geisha-y goodness.
Real citation: "The day my geisha arrives on my doorstep I feel, in a word, geishariffic!"
(Rock Stoeckel, "My Memoirs of a Geisha," March 9, 2006, McSweeney's, http://mcsweeneys.net/2006/3/9stoeckel.html)
Made-up citation: "Gazillions of geishariffic girls get government grants! Golly!"
Real citation: "The day my geisha arrives on my doorstep I feel, in a word, geishariffic!"
(Rock Stoeckel, "My Memoirs of a Geisha," March 9, 2006, McSweeney's, http://mcsweeneys.net/2006/3/9stoeckel.html)
Made-up citation: "Gazillions of geishariffic girls get government grants! Golly!"
boneresque
adj. All boners are equal in the va-jay-jay of the Lord. They're all equally boneresque too.
Real citation: "Here is the boneresque Washington Monument."
(abhorrancethrash.com/abhorrance/images/tour/2003SUM/DC-WashMon1.html)
Made-up citation: "Zoologists agree that the animal kingdom can be divided into boneresque and non-boneresque creatures. Naked mole rats are prominent members of the first category."
Real citation: "Here is the boneresque Washington Monument."
(abhorrancethrash.com/abhorrance/images/tour/2003SUM/DC-WashMon1.html)
Made-up citation: "Zoologists agree that the animal kingdom can be divided into boneresque and non-boneresque creatures. Naked mole rats are prominent members of the first category."
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
defribrohooziewhatsit
noun. A cardiologist's handy thingy.
Real citation: "Room of Magical Heart Patients and the Doctors Who Love Them. Denny's heart is beating too fast; they have to slow it down. Alex and Izzie attend to Denny as Burke calls out orders. He wants them to try a synchronized defribrohooziewhatsit."
(Erin Dailey, "What Have I Done to Deserve This?," page 6, Television Without Pity, http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=162&story=8904&page=6&sort=&limit=)
Made-up citation: "I had heart surgery for an atrial septic defect when I was 8, but I've blocked out memories of any defribrohooziewhatsit action."
Real citation: "Room of Magical Heart Patients and the Doctors Who Love Them. Denny's heart is beating too fast; they have to slow it down. Alex and Izzie attend to Denny as Burke calls out orders. He wants them to try a synchronized defribrohooziewhatsit."
(Erin Dailey, "What Have I Done to Deserve This?," page 6, Television Without Pity, http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=162&story=8904&page=6&sort=&limit=)
Made-up citation: "I had heart surgery for an atrial septic defect when I was 8, but I've blocked out memories of any defribrohooziewhatsit action."
non-stalky-creepy
adj. Totally not deserving of having nuts chopped off.
Real citation: "I love the idea of looking at a bookstore; if you could do it in a non-stalky-creepy way"
(Pomeranian, March 15, 2001, http://surveycentral.org/?x=x&V=7420)
Made-up citation: "My mother always said, 'Non-stalky-creepy doesn't mean non-prosecutable.'"
Real citation: "I love the idea of looking at a bookstore; if you could do it in a non-stalky-creepy way"
(Pomeranian, March 15, 2001, http://surveycentral.org/?x=x&V=7420)
Made-up citation: "My mother always said, 'Non-stalky-creepy doesn't mean non-prosecutable.'"
Friday, March 17, 2006
fishmongerette
noun. A fishmonger with feminine charms, wiles, and fish.
Real citation: “I met G while out shopping this morning, at an upmarket food emporium where he often shops (I was buying coffee beans). We chatted a while, eventually arriving at the fresh-fish counter where the fishmongerette greeted him by name. G ordered a dozen oysters.”
(Udge, “On buying oysters,” Sept. 18, 2004, http://udgewink.blogspot.com/2004/09/on-buying-oysters.html)
Made-up citations: "Can a fishmongerette be a vegan? Further research is needed."
Real citation: “I met G while out shopping this morning, at an upmarket food emporium where he often shops (I was buying coffee beans). We chatted a while, eventually arriving at the fresh-fish counter where the fishmongerette greeted him by name. G ordered a dozen oysters.”
(Udge, “On buying oysters,” Sept. 18, 2004, http://udgewink.blogspot.com/2004/09/on-buying-oysters.html)
Made-up citations: "Can a fishmongerette be a vegan? Further research is needed."
horsecest
noun. Conjugalicious relations with a horse, resulting in romance or death.
Related terms: cousincest, dormcest, dogcest, floorcest, horsecest, housecest, momcest, siblingcest.
Real citation: "eww, horsecest."
(Lyvianus, June 6, 2005, http://yaoi.y-gallery.net/comment/164119/)
Made-up citation: "As the Bible says, 'The snorting of his horsecest was heard from Dan: the whole land trembled at the sound of the neighing of his strong ones; for they are come, and have devoured the land, and all that is in it; the city, and those that dwell therein.'"
Related terms: cousincest, dormcest, dogcest, floorcest, horsecest, housecest, momcest, siblingcest.
Real citation: "eww, horsecest."
(Lyvianus, June 6, 2005, http://yaoi.y-gallery.net/comment/164119/)
Made-up citation: "As the Bible says, 'The snorting of his horsecest was heard from Dan: the whole land trembled at the sound of the neighing of his strong ones; for they are come, and have devoured the land, and all that is in it; the city, and those that dwell therein.'"
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
pole-up-buttedness
noun. This involves no pole of romance--only an intrusive javelin of high-strung, uptight priggery.
Related terms: bad-buttedness, bare-buttedness, big-buttedness, blubber-buttedness, broad-buttedness, bubble-buttedness, cake-buttedness, cute-buttedness, dumb-buttedness, fat-buttedness, fuzzy-buttedness, his-royal-monkey-buttedness, iron-buttedness, kick-buttedness, large-buttedness, non-fuzzy-buttedness, pain-in-the-buttedness, pig-buttedness, pucker-buttedness, stick-up-the-buttedness, suck-buttedness, tight-buttedness, whiny-buttedness.
Real citation: "i was probably laughing as a reaction and statement about the pole-up-buttedness of the proceedings, but perhaps that's mostly knee-jerk and adolescent."
(March 30, 1998, http://www.links.net/daze/98/03/30/)
Made-up citation: "Though not listed in the DMS-IV, pole-up-buttedness is all too real and painful."
Related terms: bad-buttedness, bare-buttedness, big-buttedness, blubber-buttedness, broad-buttedness, bubble-buttedness, cake-buttedness, cute-buttedness, dumb-buttedness, fat-buttedness, fuzzy-buttedness, his-royal-monkey-buttedness, iron-buttedness, kick-buttedness, large-buttedness, non-fuzzy-buttedness, pain-in-the-buttedness, pig-buttedness, pucker-buttedness, stick-up-the-buttedness, suck-buttedness, tight-buttedness, whiny-buttedness.
Real citation: "i was probably laughing as a reaction and statement about the pole-up-buttedness of the proceedings, but perhaps that's mostly knee-jerk and adolescent."
(March 30, 1998, http://www.links.net/daze/98/03/30/)
Made-up citation: "Though not listed in the DMS-IV, pole-up-buttedness is all too real and painful."
bedpanish
adj. Bedpan-y; bedpanesque; semi-bedpan-like.
Real citation: "Not really, most helmets don't have that wrap-around portion at the cheeks; that's what makes it truly look bedpanish..."
(Snake, Jan. 7, 2004, http://www.tfarchive.com/community/showthread.php?s=a46647661be1d6d953d8b180b12fcafc&threadid=
20281&perpage=30&pagenumber=3)
Made-up citation: "Now it is I who have the advantage, my bedpanish friend!"
Real citation: "Not really, most helmets don't have that wrap-around portion at the cheeks; that's what makes it truly look bedpanish..."
(Snake, Jan. 7, 2004, http://www.tfarchive.com/community/showthread.php?s=a46647661be1d6d953d8b180b12fcafc&threadid=
20281&perpage=30&pagenumber=3)
Made-up citation: "Now it is I who have the advantage, my bedpanish friend!"
Monday, March 13, 2006
fucknut magnet
noun. Someone with a powerful and frustrating fucknut-attracting quality.
Related terms: nutjob magnet, wingnut magnet, loser magnet, asshat magnet, asshole magnet, doofus magnet, dork magnet, dumbass magnet, skank magnet, ho magnet, bad kisser magnet, neanderthal magnet.
Real citation: "Yes, I'm a fucknut magnet. (Pssst...must be pissing tilUgetLaid off again. LMFAO!)"
(Debbie, Nov. 26, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/z-netz.alt.wichtig/msg/513eae90f0cc8aa6?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "If I were a fucknut magnet, I'd have to carry a crowbar or big can of Raid at all times. I have little tolerance for fucknuttery."
Related terms: nutjob magnet, wingnut magnet, loser magnet, asshat magnet, asshole magnet, doofus magnet, dork magnet, dumbass magnet, skank magnet, ho magnet, bad kisser magnet, neanderthal magnet.
Real citation: "Yes, I'm a fucknut magnet. (Pssst...must be pissing tilUgetLaid off again. LMFAO!)"
(Debbie, Nov. 26, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/z-netz.alt.wichtig/msg/513eae90f0cc8aa6?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "If I were a fucknut magnet, I'd have to carry a crowbar or big can of Raid at all times. I have little tolerance for fucknuttery."
wanna-matricide
noun. A mommy-murder that is soooo sub-par and probably takes place on the FX network, where dirty plastic surgeons and dirty cops frolic and play dirty reindeer games.
Real citation: "What extra-special irked me about Julia's wanna-matricide is that while yes, I do agree that in many ways, it could be an act of mercy (someone so appearance-oriented as her mum would NEVER want to live life as a krispy kritter), Julia seemed to be deciding Erica's worth in the world was totally based on her own need/non-need for her."
(kattart, "Nip/Tuck," Dec. 7, 2005, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=2864952&view=findpost&p=4117822)
Made-up citation: "According to the Bible, even a wanna-matricide is a no-no."
Real citation: "What extra-special irked me about Julia's wanna-matricide is that while yes, I do agree that in many ways, it could be an act of mercy (someone so appearance-oriented as her mum would NEVER want to live life as a krispy kritter), Julia seemed to be deciding Erica's worth in the world was totally based on her own need/non-need for her."
(kattart, "Nip/Tuck," Dec. 7, 2005, Television Without Pity, http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php?showtopic=2864952&view=findpost&p=4117822)
Made-up citation: "According to the Bible, even a wanna-matricide is a no-no."
Friday, March 10, 2006
mistakertunity
noun. Not a real Bushism. As far as we know.
Real citation: "Touts the 'success' story of the Coast Guard’s evacuations. I suppose if you don’t consider the need for emergency evacuations themselves as a problem… Katrina: The Mother Of All Mistakertunities."
(Ana Marie Cox, "Chatology: Passing the Buck," Feb. 20, 2006, Wonkette, http://www.wonkette.com/politics/maureeen-dowd/chatology-passing-the-buck-155869.phpwonkette.com/politics/maureeen-dowd/chatology-passing-the-buck-155869.php)
Made-up citation: "Every time a mistakertunity is misunderestimated, an English teacher stabs herself with a fork."
Real citation: "Touts the 'success' story of the Coast Guard’s evacuations. I suppose if you don’t consider the need for emergency evacuations themselves as a problem… Katrina: The Mother Of All Mistakertunities."
(Ana Marie Cox, "Chatology: Passing the Buck," Feb. 20, 2006, Wonkette, http://www.wonkette.com/politics/maureeen-dowd/chatology-passing-the-buck-155869.phpwonkette.com/politics/maureeen-dowd/chatology-passing-the-buck-155869.php)
Made-up citation: "Every time a mistakertunity is misunderestimated, an English teacher stabs herself with a fork."
brokebackitude
noun. No chiropractor necessary--unless he looks cute in chaps.
Related terms: Much linguistic brokebackery can be found here.
Real citation: "As for Ken's brokebackitude, let's not forget the notorious Earring Magic Ken, designed in the early '90s based on their observations of the guys who hung out in all-night clubs in NYC. A lot of those clubs have names like 'The Manhole'."
(Townleybomb, Feb. 9, 2006, Althouse, http://althouse.blogspot.com/2006/02/new-ken-doll.html)
Made-up citation: "I don't object to the brokebackitude of Brokeback Mountain, but I won't go see it 'cause it looks like one of the most wretched and cornbally chick flicks of the millennium. Gag me with a branding iron."
Related terms: Much linguistic brokebackery can be found here.
Real citation: "As for Ken's brokebackitude, let's not forget the notorious Earring Magic Ken, designed in the early '90s based on their observations of the guys who hung out in all-night clubs in NYC. A lot of those clubs have names like 'The Manhole'."
(Townleybomb, Feb. 9, 2006, Althouse, http://althouse.blogspot.com/2006/02/new-ken-doll.html)
Made-up citation: "I don't object to the brokebackitude of Brokeback Mountain, but I won't go see it 'cause it looks like one of the most wretched and cornbally chick flicks of the millennium. Gag me with a branding iron."
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
jackholey
adj. Kind of like a jackass plus an asshole minus two asses.
Related terms: jackhole, jackholish, jackholery.
Real citation: "first off, i've had a lot of inquiries as to how bad that one comment was that i deleted it on the last post. for the record, it was a spam comment with a link to who knows what, so i deleted it because i don't want people contracting viruses and accidentally getting on spam servers from my blog. no matter how jackholey ol' anon e mouse gets, i won't delete him. maybe. probably. :-)"
(Alice, "tales of farm school," August 12, 2005, Alice's Wonderland, http://aliceblogs.blogspot.com/2005/08/tales-of-farm-school.html)
Made-up citation: "For the new essay section of the SAT, students will need to carefully define 'jackholey,' 'assholey,' and 'buttholey' using specific examples from their neighborhoods and gene pools."
Related terms: jackhole, jackholish, jackholery.
Real citation: "first off, i've had a lot of inquiries as to how bad that one comment was that i deleted it on the last post. for the record, it was a spam comment with a link to who knows what, so i deleted it because i don't want people contracting viruses and accidentally getting on spam servers from my blog. no matter how jackholey ol' anon e mouse gets, i won't delete him. maybe. probably. :-)"
(Alice, "tales of farm school," August 12, 2005, Alice's Wonderland, http://aliceblogs.blogspot.com/2005/08/tales-of-farm-school.html)
Made-up citation: "For the new essay section of the SAT, students will need to carefully define 'jackholey,' 'assholey,' and 'buttholey' using specific examples from their neighborhoods and gene pools."
nadtastic
adj. Once more with balls.
Related terms: nadtacular.
Real citation: “Why do dudes love Bruce Dickinson so much? Is it his operatic stylings? Could it be his chameleonlike ability to effortlessly change his career midstream? Or is it his Nadtastic outfits? No one knows for sure, not even Bruce!”
(Steben Wintle, Nov. 14, 2004, http://www.ottawaxpress.ca/books/books.aspx?iIDArticle=4724)
Made-up citation: "If testicular cancer were renamed 'nadtastic cancer,' scientists agree that very little grooviness would be added."
Related terms: nadtacular.
Real citation: “Why do dudes love Bruce Dickinson so much? Is it his operatic stylings? Could it be his chameleonlike ability to effortlessly change his career midstream? Or is it his Nadtastic outfits? No one knows for sure, not even Bruce!”
(Steben Wintle, Nov. 14, 2004, http://www.ottawaxpress.ca/books/books.aspx?iIDArticle=4724)
Made-up citation: "If testicular cancer were renamed 'nadtastic cancer,' scientists agree that very little grooviness would be added."
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
date-iest
adj. There's a lot of dating going on here, people. You might want to avert your eyes.
Real citation: "Without a doubt, Lindsay is the "date-iest" gal in Hollyweird, being romantically linked with a litany of Tinseltown royalty, including Colin Farrell, Joaquin Phoenix, Jude Law, Wilmer Valderrama, Jared Leto, Benicio del Toro, perhaps Bruce Willis, Bryan Adams, Ryan Adams, and this week? Match Point star Jonathan Rhys Meyers, who was spotted rooting around Lohan at NYC's posh Spotted Pig."
(Ann Romano, "One Day at a Time," March 2, 2006, Portland Mercury, http://www.portlandmercury.com/portland/Content?category=22175&issue=37578)
Made-up citation: "This is probably one of the date-iest periods of my life...though not the hot-monkey-sexiest, unfortunately."
Real citation: "Without a doubt, Lindsay is the "date-iest" gal in Hollyweird, being romantically linked with a litany of Tinseltown royalty, including Colin Farrell, Joaquin Phoenix, Jude Law, Wilmer Valderrama, Jared Leto, Benicio del Toro, perhaps Bruce Willis, Bryan Adams, Ryan Adams, and this week? Match Point star Jonathan Rhys Meyers, who was spotted rooting around Lohan at NYC's posh Spotted Pig."
(Ann Romano, "One Day at a Time," March 2, 2006, Portland Mercury, http://www.portlandmercury.com/portland/Content?category=22175&issue=37578)
Made-up citation: "This is probably one of the date-iest periods of my life...though not the hot-monkey-sexiest, unfortunately."
pseudo-doofus
noun. A doof who is a goddamn frackin' poser doof.
Real citation: "The pseudo-doofus writes: Fine as far as it goes. Your links page is missing one of the best, though. Start with this url, and work your way through:"
(http://www.xent.com/jan00/0162.html)
Made-up citation: "Scientists agree that pseudo-doofi are lower forms of life than doofi, though a cure has yet to be found."
Real citation: "The pseudo-doofus writes: Fine as far as it goes. Your links page is missing one of the best, though. Start with this url, and work your way through:"
(http://www.xent.com/jan00/0162.html)
Made-up citation: "Scientists agree that pseudo-doofi are lower forms of life than doofi, though a cure has yet to be found."
Monday, March 06, 2006
butt-white
adj. That means quite white, folks--chock full o' honkiness and crackerosity.
Related terms: butt boring, butt naked, butt stupid, butt lazy, butt annoying, butt horrible, butt heinous, butt awful, butt crappy, butt lousy, butt lame, butt nasty, pig-butt nasty.
Real citation: "It's pretty depressing, and will make the honkies among us deeply ashamed to be butt-white and filled with just as little understanding and just as many prejudices as Carmen and Bruno."
(Heather Havrilesky, "I Like to Watch," Feb. 26, 2006, Salon, http://www.salon.com/ent/tv/review/2006/02/26/i_like/index2.html)
Made-up citation: "The newest Crayola color Butt-White is not being used to paint a masterpiece of racial harmony in elementary schools across the nation."
Related terms: butt boring, butt naked, butt stupid, butt lazy, butt annoying, butt horrible, butt heinous, butt awful, butt crappy, butt lousy, butt lame, butt nasty, pig-butt nasty.
Real citation: "It's pretty depressing, and will make the honkies among us deeply ashamed to be butt-white and filled with just as little understanding and just as many prejudices as Carmen and Bruno."
(Heather Havrilesky, "I Like to Watch," Feb. 26, 2006, Salon, http://www.salon.com/ent/tv/review/2006/02/26/i_like/index2.html)
Made-up citation: "The newest Crayola color Butt-White is not being used to paint a masterpiece of racial harmony in elementary schools across the nation."
newscretin
noun. A somewhat redundant term for a non-sharp newsdude or newsdudette.
Real citation: "Don't waste time arguing with a person this crazed. The only people who think O.J. is innocent are Paige, nine semi-retarded jurors, and newscretin Tavis Smiley."
(Yukon Cornelius, Oct. 12, 2001, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.gossip.celebrities/
msg/ea809c0ee6f25b2a)
Made-up citation: "A newscretin is a special kind of cretin, just as a female naked mole rat is a special kind of naked female hottie."
Real citation: "Don't waste time arguing with a person this crazed. The only people who think O.J. is innocent are Paige, nine semi-retarded jurors, and newscretin Tavis Smiley."
(Yukon Cornelius, Oct. 12, 2001, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.gossip.celebrities/
msg/ea809c0ee6f25b2a)
Made-up citation: "A newscretin is a special kind of cretin, just as a female naked mole rat is a special kind of naked female hottie."
Friday, March 03, 2006
moonbatette
noun. A raving loony of the female-ier sex.
Related terms: moonbat, moonbatter, moonbatty, non-moonbatty, moonbatish, non-moonbatish, moonbatesque, moonbattitude, moonbattery, moonbattage, moonbatosity, moonbatism, moonbatterism.
Real citation: "His wife is CONTEMPLATING divorce? Just thinking about divorce? Well, I suppose it doesn't matter, because if she does divorce him there are plenty of stupid women out there. And I bet you some sicko moonbatette will read about it in the papers and think..."Hmmm. So he's single again?" And write to him in prison."
(mollywog, June 28, 2005, http://64.233.179.104/search?q=cache:elcPjRb3TugJ:www.rightnation.us/forums/index.php%3Fact%3Dfindpost%26pid%3D683093329+moonbatette&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1)
Made-up citation: "Batwomen, dingbats, and moonbatettes have their charms. Especially if you're Batman or a batshit-nutty whackjob."
Related terms: moonbat, moonbatter, moonbatty, non-moonbatty, moonbatish, non-moonbatish, moonbatesque, moonbattitude, moonbattery, moonbattage, moonbatosity, moonbatism, moonbatterism.
Real citation: "His wife is CONTEMPLATING divorce? Just thinking about divorce? Well, I suppose it doesn't matter, because if she does divorce him there are plenty of stupid women out there. And I bet you some sicko moonbatette will read about it in the papers and think..."Hmmm. So he's single again?" And write to him in prison."
(mollywog, June 28, 2005, http://64.233.179.104/search?q=cache:elcPjRb3TugJ:www.rightnation.us/forums/index.php%3Fact%3Dfindpost%26pid%3D683093329+moonbatette&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1)
Made-up citation: "Batwomen, dingbats, and moonbatettes have their charms. Especially if you're Batman or a batshit-nutty whackjob."
fanfuckingtacular
adj. Fantastically, spectacularly fucking whatever.
Real citation: “i wouldve said fanfuckingtacular animation, mediocre song.”
(inhauntedattics, Feb, 9, 2005, http://hatofbugs.com/beautifulground/index.php?showtopic=366)
Made-up citation: "The most fanfuckingtacular show I've gotten into lately is The Shield, and I don't even like cop shows. But I guess I like dirty cop shows, because this shit is as addictive as the crack the main characters plant on suspects."
Real citation: “i wouldve said fanfuckingtacular animation, mediocre song.”
(inhauntedattics, Feb, 9, 2005, http://hatofbugs.com/beautifulground/index.php?showtopic=366)
Made-up citation: "The most fanfuckingtacular show I've gotten into lately is The Shield, and I don't even like cop shows. But I guess I like dirty cop shows, because this shit is as addictive as the crack the main characters plant on suspects."
destankification
noun. The arduous stank-removing process.
Real citation: "I wasn't paying attention while showering this morning, and I soaped before I shampooed! I can't even remember violating this routine; I'm pretty sure I've maintained it since I started showers instead of baths. The world is going to end. Tags: destankification, eschatology, me"
(ultranurd, Dec. 17, 2005, The Den of Nurdage, http://ultranurd.livejournal.com/tag/destankification)
Made-up citation: "There's a fine line between destankification and deskankification, according to the Bible."
Real citation: "I wasn't paying attention while showering this morning, and I soaped before I shampooed! I can't even remember violating this routine; I'm pretty sure I've maintained it since I started showers instead of baths. The world is going to end. Tags: destankification, eschatology, me"
(ultranurd, Dec. 17, 2005, The Den of Nurdage, http://ultranurd.livejournal.com/tag/destankification)
Made-up citation: "There's a fine line between destankification and deskankification, according to the Bible."
Friday, February 24, 2006
sex-upedness
noun. The quality and essence of something that has been royally pumped full of crass sexual appeal, not unlike a blow-up doll. Pardon me, I've just been informed the preferred term is "Inflatable American."
Related terms: all-wrapped-upedness, backed-upedness, beat-upedness, blowing-upedness, blow-upedness, bottom-upedness, broken-upedness, built-upedness, bundled-upedness, bung-upedness, busted-upedness, catch-upedness, caught-upedness, chalked-upedness, charged-upedness, choked-upedness, chopped-upedness, cooped-upedness, crack-upedness, cuddled-upedness, dipfucked-upedness, fed-upedness, fired-upedness, fucked-upedness, fuck-upedness, funked-upedness, gear-upedness, grown-upedness, hard-upedness, high-upedness, hooked-upedness, hooking-upedness, hung-upedness, hyped-upedness, jacked-upedness, knocked-upedness, made-upedness, mashing-upedness, messed-upedness, mix-upedness, mocked-upedness, not-waking-upedness, one-upedness, pent-upedness, pop-upedness, power-upedness, psyched-upedness, puffed-upedness, pump-upedness, put-upedness, riled-upedness, ripped-upedness, runner-upedness, screwed-upedness, screw-upedness, serious-fucked-upedness, shut-upedness, stirred-upedness, stuck-upedness, stuffed-upedness, suckin’upedness, suck-upedness, total-fucked-upedness, un-made-upedness, warmed-upedness, washed-upedness, wash-upedness, woken-upedness, wound-upedness.
Real citation: "The basic rule of interpreting remade movies is to start with the insistence that the original is better while subvocally recognizing the better pacing and sex-upedness of the Hollywood remake."
(nanio, Jan. 23, 2006, http://64.233.179.104/search?q=cache:Jx7IRdSm3EwJ:www.quasify.com/+%22sex-upedness%22&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1)
Made-up citation: "Sex-upedness does not necessarily involve sex, though dipfucked-upedness will always involve a dipfuck, according to dudes at a local research university."
Related terms: all-wrapped-upedness, backed-upedness, beat-upedness, blowing-upedness, blow-upedness, bottom-upedness, broken-upedness, built-upedness, bundled-upedness, bung-upedness, busted-upedness, catch-upedness, caught-upedness, chalked-upedness, charged-upedness, choked-upedness, chopped-upedness, cooped-upedness, crack-upedness, cuddled-upedness, dipfucked-upedness, fed-upedness, fired-upedness, fucked-upedness, fuck-upedness, funked-upedness, gear-upedness, grown-upedness, hard-upedness, high-upedness, hooked-upedness, hooking-upedness, hung-upedness, hyped-upedness, jacked-upedness, knocked-upedness, made-upedness, mashing-upedness, messed-upedness, mix-upedness, mocked-upedness, not-waking-upedness, one-upedness, pent-upedness, pop-upedness, power-upedness, psyched-upedness, puffed-upedness, pump-upedness, put-upedness, riled-upedness, ripped-upedness, runner-upedness, screwed-upedness, screw-upedness, serious-fucked-upedness, shut-upedness, stirred-upedness, stuck-upedness, stuffed-upedness, suckin’upedness, suck-upedness, total-fucked-upedness, un-made-upedness, warmed-upedness, washed-upedness, wash-upedness, woken-upedness, wound-upedness.
Real citation: "The basic rule of interpreting remade movies is to start with the insistence that the original is better while subvocally recognizing the better pacing and sex-upedness of the Hollywood remake."
(nanio, Jan. 23, 2006, http://64.233.179.104/search?q=cache:Jx7IRdSm3EwJ:www.quasify.com/+%22sex-upedness%22&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1)
Made-up citation: "Sex-upedness does not necessarily involve sex, though dipfucked-upedness will always involve a dipfuck, according to dudes at a local research university."
milfitude
noun. Look deep into the hotness of a MILF, and this ye shall find.
Real citation: "Despite having the name of someone's uncle, Daryl is way hotter in her milfitude than Uma."
(Rpb406, July 22, 2004, http://wehateerwin.com/search.php?search_author=Rob406&sid=c7961233c6c77f19e3e1d60173482a1e)
Made-up citation: "Lena Olin's got more milfitude than I can fathom, and I can fathom a lot. I'm a real fathomer. She's just HOT, folks."
Real citation: "Despite having the name of someone's uncle, Daryl is way hotter in her milfitude than Uma."
(Rpb406, July 22, 2004, http://wehateerwin.com/search.php?search_author=Rob406&sid=c7961233c6c77f19e3e1d60173482a1e)
Made-up citation: "Lena Olin's got more milfitude than I can fathom, and I can fathom a lot. I'm a real fathomer. She's just HOT, folks."
Thursday, February 23, 2006
anti-kavorka
noun. An essence, mystical power, or animal-magnetismish quality that personally drives women into nunneries or lesbionic activities in droves.
Real citation: "Well, you turned her _into_ a nun, so it seems you have anti-kavorka."
(MikeWrite, June 19, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.books.tom-clancy/msg/305ed42c53aa7cba?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Though dating does feel like getting a drano enema most of the time, I'm not convinced I have anti-kavorka. Further research is needed."
Real citation: "Well, you turned her _into_ a nun, so it seems you have anti-kavorka."
(MikeWrite, June 19, 2002, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.books.tom-clancy/msg/305ed42c53aa7cba?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "Though dating does feel like getting a drano enema most of the time, I'm not convinced I have anti-kavorka. Further research is needed."
perma-sneery
adj. I told you your face would freeze that way.
Real citation: "Doctor Who didn't and yet they're regarded as its defining feature, and though I really shouldn't let these things bother me it's all part and parcel of this perma-sneery attitude the media has now, and I'm fucking sick to the back teeth of it."
(Rob Matthews, Nov. 28, 2003, http://www.pagefillers.com/dwrg/topten10.htm)
Made-up citation: "No one like a perma-sneery putz--not even a portly proctologist."
Real citation: "Doctor Who didn't and yet they're regarded as its defining feature, and though I really shouldn't let these things bother me it's all part and parcel of this perma-sneery attitude the media has now, and I'm fucking sick to the back teeth of it."
(Rob Matthews, Nov. 28, 2003, http://www.pagefillers.com/dwrg/topten10.htm)
Made-up citation: "No one like a perma-sneery putz--not even a portly proctologist."
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
metric dickload
noun. Though actual tallywhackers vary in size from teeny-weeny to circus-freaky, a metric dickload is always more than a mouthful.
Related terms: metric buttload, metric assload, metric arseload, metric bootyload, metric poop-load, metric poo-load, metric shitload, metric crapload, metric fuckload, metric frackload, metric boatload, metric truckload, metric smurfload, metric cuntload, metric cockload, metric pantload, metric pantsload.
Real citation: "Would that be a metric dickload or an Imperial dickload?"
(http://users.erols.com/aburner/quotes.txt)
Made-up citation: "He may not know the difference between a metric dickload and a bazillion, but Alex the parrot does understand the concept of diddly-poo."
Related terms: metric buttload, metric assload, metric arseload, metric bootyload, metric poop-load, metric poo-load, metric shitload, metric crapload, metric fuckload, metric frackload, metric boatload, metric truckload, metric smurfload, metric cuntload, metric cockload, metric pantload, metric pantsload.
Real citation: "Would that be a metric dickload or an Imperial dickload?"
(http://users.erols.com/aburner/quotes.txt)
Made-up citation: "He may not know the difference between a metric dickload and a bazillion, but Alex the parrot does understand the concept of diddly-poo."
Bushtin
noun. The love that can only bloom between George W. Bush and Vladimir Putin.
Related terms: Bennifer, Brangelina, Spuffy, TomKat, Vaunghistan.
Real citation: Bumiller: “Did President Bush misjudge Putin when he said he had looked into his eyes and seen his soul?” Never trust love at first sight. Rice says something that’s not really an answer and unfortunately doesn’t say if Bushtin (Putsh?) is still a couple or not.
(Ana Marie Cox, "Chatology: Digesting the Sunday Spew," Feb. 13, 2006, Wonkette, http://wonkette.com/politics/chatology/chatology-digesting-the-sunday-spew-154401.php)
Made-up citation: "Pootie-Poot and Commander Cuckoo-Bananas were caught canoodling in Kentucky--it's a Bushtin bonanza, live on CNN!"
Related terms: Bennifer, Brangelina, Spuffy, TomKat, Vaunghistan.
Real citation: Bumiller: “Did President Bush misjudge Putin when he said he had looked into his eyes and seen his soul?” Never trust love at first sight. Rice says something that’s not really an answer and unfortunately doesn’t say if Bushtin (Putsh?) is still a couple or not.
(Ana Marie Cox, "Chatology: Digesting the Sunday Spew," Feb. 13, 2006, Wonkette, http://wonkette.com/politics/chatology/chatology-digesting-the-sunday-spew-154401.php)
Made-up citation: "Pootie-Poot and Commander Cuckoo-Bananas were caught canoodling in Kentucky--it's a Bushtin bonanza, live on CNN!"
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
non-bonerish
adj. Yes, we have no bananas.
Real citation: "yea dont worry about it..im on this xanga thing when i should finishing or rather STARTING over due work...hahaha....daughters like mothers? anywhos.....is that your DOG? i want him....bring him to me so i can play with him...in a non bonerish kinda way...haha"
(MonkeeTee, April 26, 2005, http://www.xanga.com/item.aspx?user=morphingsheep&tab=weblogs&uid=249783793)
Made-up citation: "It's never easy for former fuckmonkeys to enjoy a friendship that is completely non-bonerish. Unless they're women."
Real citation: "yea dont worry about it..im on this xanga thing when i should finishing or rather STARTING over due work...hahaha....daughters like mothers? anywhos.....is that your DOG? i want him....bring him to me so i can play with him...in a non bonerish kinda way...haha"
(MonkeeTee, April 26, 2005, http://www.xanga.com/item.aspx?user=morphingsheep&tab=weblogs&uid=249783793)
Made-up citation: "It's never easy for former fuckmonkeys to enjoy a friendship that is completely non-bonerish. Unless they're women."
boinkdom
noun. The land of boinkery, where hot squishy monkey sex is the conjugalicious norm.
Real citation: " One thing for sure: There should be plenty to talk about when two or more AUEers are gathered in the name of boinkdom. There are many sides to this group."
(Maria Conlon, Dec. 28, 2002, groups.google.com/group/alt.usage.english/msg/8448d1272b889a72?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "In the kingdom of heaven, the boinkdom of heaven will melt your face and bake your noodle, if God is a merciful God and not just another asswipe."
Real citation: " One thing for sure: There should be plenty to talk about when two or more AUEers are gathered in the name of boinkdom. There are many sides to this group."
(Maria Conlon, Dec. 28, 2002, groups.google.com/group/alt.usage.english/msg/8448d1272b889a72?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "In the kingdom of heaven, the boinkdom of heaven will melt your face and bake your noodle, if God is a merciful God and not just another asswipe."
Monday, February 20, 2006
fuckheadface
noun. The closest relative of the common fuckfacehead.
Related terms: shitheadface.
Real citation: "Better to succeed entirely at one thing than to be a failure at everything like YOU. Thanks for the superlative, fuckheadface."
(Match 17, 2001, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.games.final-fantasy/msg/5a71b4baade9b0b1?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "I divide the world into two types of people: leprechauns and fuckheadfaces. Wheee!"
Related terms: shitheadface.
Real citation: "Better to succeed entirely at one thing than to be a failure at everything like YOU. Thanks for the superlative, fuckheadface."
(Match 17, 2001, http://groups.google.com/group/alt.games.final-fantasy/msg/5a71b4baade9b0b1?hl=en&)
Made-up citation: "I divide the world into two types of people: leprechauns and fuckheadfaces. Wheee!"
sleepwank
verb. A non-master-of-your-domainy, post-sheep-counting, mega-ishy activity that you had better not be doing in the top bunk, mister.
Real citation: "Someone i used to know used to sleepwank, she'd wake up flicking her bean. very embarrising on guide camp."
(Phil, April 26, 2003, http://www.voodoojunkie.com/voodooboard/viewtopic.php?p=172872&sid=ede3cab70df57a388df05276c29e2d08)
Made-up citation: "I thought snoring and jimmy legs were bad qualities in a bedmate...then I read about sleepwanking. Get me to a nunnery, stat!"
Real citation: "Someone i used to know used to sleepwank, she'd wake up flicking her bean. very embarrising on guide camp."
(Phil, April 26, 2003, http://www.voodoojunkie.com/voodooboard/viewtopic.php?p=172872&sid=ede3cab70df57a388df05276c29e2d08)
Made-up citation: "I thought snoring and jimmy legs were bad qualities in a bedmate...then I read about sleepwanking. Get me to a nunnery, stat!"
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