Wednesday, December 10, 2008


noun. Not a do-gooder. Not an evil-doer. This type can be found somewhere in the middle, on a soft couch suspended in a moral vacuum. Or, this type can be found everywhere, working a bazillion jobs at once, just to keep the boat floating on the solvent seas.

Real citation: "Moving on, things have been, you know, they way they may or may not supposed to be the summer before you leave for college after a non-traditional year of life that makes you pretty sure you're ready for it. Whether or not I'll really like it is not yet the issue. It's just time to move on. It's always on my mind but it's rare that I actually really think about that. Instead, I've spent a couple days doing menial jobs for anyone in the school of the arts where my mom pimps me out. I consider myself a freelance dowhateverer."
(June 7, 2005, almost famous,

Made-up citation: "Though my card says Executive Freelance Dowhateverer, I have standards. For example, I will humiliate myself, but I won't debase myself. I'll gladly become a floor-licker, but for the bathroom floor, I'll use my toothbrush. For a modest fee, I'll allow strangers to pour beer on me, but only the good stuff--start with a double IPA, please."

1 comment:

aworkinprogress said...

I think this might be my new favorite!