non-emergency-room-physician-type

adj. A word encompassing nearly all the bozos who roam the earth.

Real citation: “What did regular, non-emergency-room-physician-type people do BEFORE the advent of cell phones? Did they run to the pay phone near the bathrooms every five minutes? No. They simply did not get the calls. Or they checked their voicemail after the meal. OR they stayed at home and waited for the calls. OR they went to the hospital and waited with the person from whom they would expect the calls. When did it become acceptable to answer and engage in cell-phone conversations when dining out? To me, it's one thing: RUDE.”
(April 1, 2008, Tomato Nation, http://tomatonation.com/?p=2019#more-2019)

Made-up citation: “I’m a unique, special individual. I said I'd never try online dating! But since I'm here, I’d like to meet a non-splodey, non-sharey, non-turdly, non-emergency-room-physician-type non-sleazoid. I'm allergic to ferrets, and you should be too."