grandmother-induced

adj. Instigated, perpetrated, or regurgitated by good ol' gran-gran.

Real citations: "I'm still not in the stock market. I still haven't finished the Old Testament. I still haven't heard back from George Mason or James Madison; I'm not even on speaking terms with Patrick Henry. The fish I caught this summer was pathetic. I still don't have my hunting license. My enemy list is twice as long as it was a year ago. My wardrobe, mostly due to grandmother-induced bleach stains, isn't quite as nice. My CDs are all scratched. My tires are going bald. I'm going deaf in my left ear. I still haven't gotten into college sports. I got tired of my novel. I met Terry Brooks, but I didn't like him. And the thermodynamic state of the universe keeps getting more and more damn chaotic."
(March 2, 2005, http://quotidian.trilidun.org/index.php/2002/1036851974?FviewAll=0&Fsubmit=read)

Made-up citation: "Grandmother-induced wild monkey sex is highly recommended--if Lena Olin is the grandmother."