adj. Dry-butted and minty fresh.
Real citation: "and my new favorite shorts kept me swamp-ass free. Really, these Joe’s Bike Garage shorts made by Louis Garneau were awesome. I fully recommend them!"
(Megan Bilodeau, "sneaky," June 4, 2006, http://www.newenglandcross.com/NewEnglandCross.com/blogit/9B513333-5239-4CD6-AD9E-770824947543.html)
Made-up citation: "My freezing face, fingers, and dog are not ecstatic over the cold weather, but my nether-regions do enjoy this swamp-ass-free time of the year."