We will free the pee

I don't know what that headline means, other than "I'm jealous of the New York Post headline writers."

Today I have a lot of words of the day, and they are all full of pee.

First, some background: this idea started two days ago, when my friend Theresa called, asking that I entertain her while she cleaned her room. Since I do this same type of self-serving multitasking all the time, I had no high horse to ride away on, and I agreed, grabbing one of my books by Dan Savage, the terrific writer and sex columnist.

I read several Savage Love letters and responses to Theresa, from the book and online, including a heartwarming story about the kind of love that can only happen between a grandmother and her parakeet.

In one column, Savage reminded me of why I like hyphenated words so much--because you can make 'em up lickety-split. While discussing watersports, Savage goes on a new-word-making frenzy, which I'll quote here:

"What's the opposite of pee-shy anyway? Pee-gregarious? Pee-forward? Pee-friendly? Pee-affable? Pee-cordial? Pee-social?"

Keep these words in mind when writing your next personal ad or limerick.

Well, I have to admit, Savage has got me kind of jealous now, what with all those new words of his. Since the world has a dire shortage of hyphenated adjectives with "pee" in them, I made up some brand-spanking-new pee words of my own to fill the gap. Use with caution:

pee-activated
pee-adjacent
pee-affirmative
pee-approved
pee-baiting
pee-based
pee-bashing
pee-boosting
pee-caused
pee-centric
pee-challenged
pee-compliant
pee-conducive
pee-controlled
pee-crazed
pee-dependent
pee-enhancing
pee-equipped
pee-faced
pee-flattering
pee-flavored
pee-footed
pee-free
pee-happy
pee-headed
pee-hopping
pee-induced
pee-infested
pee-infused
pee-initiated
pee-intensive
pee-intrusive
pee-ish
pee-level
pee-minded
pee-only
pee-oriented
pee-powered
pee-prone
pee-recommended
pee-safe
pee-scented
pee-shaped
pee-specific
pee-sponsored
pee-struck
pee-style
pee-tailed
pee-tested
pee-themed
pee-trained
pee-wacky
pee-weary
pee-whipped
pee-worshipping
pee-worthy