Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Get outta my dreams, get into my tent

Today's word is "wash"--an un-orgasm-causing word on its own. As part of some phrases though, it gives me a big, fat happy.

I'm a fan of "It'll all come out in the wash" and "That makes me want to wash my hands," but I've been unsuccessfully trying to find the origin of another saying, which usually follows this pattern: "Have him/her/the dog/the vacuum cleaner washed and brought to my tent."

Sometimes the phrasing is "stripped, washed, and brought to my tent," and other times shaving, scrubbing, oiling, cleaning, bathing, perfuming, or disinfecting is part of the equation. Here are some versions I found with Google:
  • Have Teri Hatcher scrubbed and brought to my tent.
  • Have the slaveboy washed and brought to my tent!
  • Sir , have that man oiled and brought to my tent.
  • Have that one stripped, washed and brought to my tent, forthwith!
  • The President said, “have her cleaned and perfumed and brought to my tent."
  • Have him shaved and oiled and brought to my tent!
  • Have the fat, hairy loser in row 2, seat 2 brought to my tent so that I may breed with him.
  • Just scrape off all traces of your local women, have it disinfected and washed and brought to my tent!
  • Have new ones showered and brought to my tent, won't you?
  • And just for the record, you can keep Keanu -- have Hugo washed and brought to my tent, and nobody gets hurt.

In nearly every case, whoever is being requested in the tent is wanted for (cue porn music) Biblical reasons, but what is the deal with this expression? Did it originate in a movie--or just a well-publicized tent? If anyone knows where this expression started, please let me know.


1 comment:

Willy said...

Great post. It has been said that Cher, upon seeing 22 year old Rob "Bagel Boy" Camiletti in 1986, said "Have him stripped and washed and brought to me."