Real citation: "I don't need special instruments to achieve my goals. I was born with all the bait I need to lead you into my trap. And you? Conveniently enough, you were born with a meat leash between your legs which allows me to lead you around as I choose and mold you as I see fit. Oh, I know that in your everyday, workaday world you swagger about issuing orders, bossing around the office girls, making big decisions and then you go home to command and be coddled by wifey."
Made-up citation: "Granddad was never the same after Grandma made meat pie out of his meat leash and served it to Snuggles."